


Home Sweet Home: Sanguine Lifestyle

by VioletAmet



Series: Capricious [6]
Category: Shadowrun: Hong Kong
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Complicated Relationships, Emotional Baggage, Enemies to Friends, Friends to Enemies, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Multi, Not Beta Read, Partners in Crime, Sexual Content, Suggestive Themes, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-28
Updated: 2019-09-27
Packaged: 2019-09-29 06:56:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 20
Words: 52,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17198690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VioletAmet/pseuds/VioletAmet
Summary: She had made her choice back at that facility. Since then, he wanted to hunt her down to take her life, for the price of betrayal. But, when he finds her, things had turned out differently for the both of them. For her life, Carmen, formerly known as Capricious, is once again working with Racter, while working under a HMHVV infected man named Ryan Drake, in a strip club named Club Sanguine.Once a shadowrunner, always a shadowrunner.[A remake of the original Home Sweet Home. Since I have felt unhappy with how it turned out, I had decided to start over, and rewrite the story. I hope to bring in some ideas from the original, but I will keep the original up for references, and if anyone wants to read it. It's an AU after all. Anyway, take it easy dudes.][Latest chapter: "Sera" - (A brief growl rumbled in her throat as her brows furrowed. "Ryan is a pain in the ass...")]





	1. A Former Friend

Guards fell one by one under the hail of bullets, while workers got pulled in to a group, to keep them out of harm's way. They all held each other, confused and scared of their fate, aside from a few who seemed apathetic about it.

A huge troll, with a cigar clenched between his bulging teeth, approached the workers to eye them one by one. "To anyone wearing a cybernetic right arm, raise up your hand."

They hesitated to do it, until someone shot bullets into the air. "Do it now!" the shooter yelled, making the workers whimper, and thrust their hands upward.

One by one, they got pulled out.

"Hey, Racter, are one of these your old friend?" asked the troll in a heavy English accent.

Racter slowly approached the group, looking at them briefly, before shaking his head. "No," he replied. "None of the guards were either..."

"Well, then that's unfortunate... let's finish our jobs, and go get some drinks afterwards!"

The group, except for Racter, cheered, before they cleared out the warehouse, leaving no one alive.

 

With a cigarette between his teeth, Racter leaned against Koschei to support his weight, due to his malfunctioning legs.

 

_“I... want to get my old life back...” Capricious spoke up, loud and clear, to her supposed friends. “I want our lives back... I’m... sorry...”_

 

Racter grinded the cigarette between his teeth, while Koschei grind his limb against the pavement. He thought he had finally understood Capricious, until she said that she wanted to get her life back. Was everything she had done was to benefit her and her brother, and only them?

Whatever the reason was, she had left the crew, and nothing has been the same since.

A puff of smoke escaped from him, until he heard the troll, “Lionheart”, approach him from behind.

“I know you don’t care for this sort of stuff, but I think you need a break, Doc. Come, and join us! I’ve heard they have some pretty great bars here... as well as party places where you can watch strippers.”

Racter shook his head with a frown. “I’m afraid I-” “It wasn’t an offer you can deny, Doc.” Lionheart chuckled as he gave a firm squeeze on his shoulder. “Also, seriously, you’ve been hunting for this... Carmen for a while, and it’s clear that what that ork had told was not true. You need a break.”

Racter glared at Lionheart for a moment, as Koschei whirred and clicked his limbs against the pavement. “I’m afraid I can’t waste anymore time, Lionheart,” he replied through gritted teeth. “I’m going to find her.”

“And kill her. I know, I know...” Lionheart huffed. “Well, you’ve been very useful to us, so I will help you, Doc. But, since we’re here in Seattle, it can’t hurt to explore the city a bit. I’ve heard there is this quite well known pub in one of the Barrens... but I forgot which. Anyway, let’s go do some exploring, take your mind off from your hunt, and enjoy life... after all, you’re not getting any younger.”

Racter raised a brow. As true as it was, he was barely over his forties. Perhaps the hunt has drained more than just his resources and time.

 

The city was quite bigger than he had expected, and rather disorganized too, compared to other places Racter has been. He’ve heard stories about the Barrens, not just from Capricious and Duncan, but through rumors in the Shadowlands. From what he can tell, it’s just as bad as some other places, if not worse, but definitely not as bad as Heoi.

Perhaps that was one reason why Capricious wanted to get out of the shadowrun business when she had the chance.

But, as much as he questions her reasons, there was no point to it.

She had left him. She had broken her promise that she would stand by his side, when they usher in a new form of life. She seemed so genuine about it, until that offer came up.

Racter couldn’t help but scowl when he remembered, while Koschei roared.

Capricious is a liar and a traitor, and his prey, he thought. That’s all.

Once she is dead, he can go back to work on accomplishing his goals without her in his head all the time.

“Holy frag!” one of the crew members shouted. “This one bar is hosting a grand party, with some hot arse strippers!”

“Really?” Lionheart asked as he approached them. “What kind of arses?”

“Just look, boss!” they said as they gave him the pamphlet.

An impressed hum came from him as he read the pamphlet. “Right then, let’s go to this... ‘Club Sanguine’.”

 

As they approached the club, Racter eyed the troll at the entrance. He had quite an impressive beard, along with a few scars and an eye patch to boot. As quite over the top he seemed, something about him told him that, he wasn’t afraid of getting into a few bloody fights, to prove that this isn’t a club to mess around in.

Lionheart chuckled as he approached the bouncer. “’Ello there,” he said, “Me and my lads want in on this club.”

The man stared him down in silence, before turning his good eye to the crew behind him.

For a brief moment, as soon as he locked eyes with Racter, there was this look of recognition on his face, before the bouncer turned to glare at Lionheart. “As long as your friend there doesn’t cause any chaos with that drone of his, as well as the rest of your little crew, you’re free to go inside. However, any slip up, and you all get the boot, all right?” the troll replied, in a gruff voice that shared Lionheart’s accent.

Lionheart couldn’t help but smile and nod. “Don’t you worry, we know how to behave.” Which was an utter lie that even the bouncer could tell, but he allowed them in anyway.

Racter kept his eye on the troll as he walked past him. There was something off about this, he thought, and he didn’t like it one bit.

The club was already filled with people, as they danced to the beat of the music that blared through the large speakers, hooked up to the bright red neon lights. As they tried to approach the bar, a slender man approached them with a cup of red wine in his hand.

However, Racter quickly noticed that it looked thicker than regular wine, as the flamboyant man swirled it in his hand. “Welcome to my lovely bar, beautiful people. Take your time, and enjoy yourselves, because even runners need a break too.”

Lionheart blinked, before a grin formed on his face. “Is it just runners, or...?”

The man shrugged before he turned on his high heel away from them. “You’d be surprised... Anyway, enjoy yourselves!” he said, before he disappeared into the crowd.

Lionheart snickered. “Right... Well, let’s do as the man, says, eh?”

 

Strippers started to appear across various platforms, dancing for attention and money.

Racter sat at the bar, while the rest of the crew decided to watch the strippers perform. He looked down at Koschei, feeling fortunate that he didn’t run off like the others, and ran his hand over his chassis.

From the corner of his eye, he spotted the slender man from earlier, relaxing on a couch, while speaking to a woman that stood with a PDA in her hand. They seemed to have been having an argument, before the woman planted her right hand against her face.

As soon as she pocketed her PDA, the woman left through a staff only door, while the slender man seemed rather smug as he laid against his couch.

Since he wasn’t getting any sort of amusement in this club, Racter decided that it would be best to approach this man to ask him a few questions. With an easy smile, he caught the man’s attention with a raised brow.

“Excuse me, sir, I apolo-” “Oh, drop the formalities. We’re in a club to enjoy ourselves, not do business... unless... you want to do business.”

Racter was caught off guard, before he adjusted his black torn weathered coat, and spoke. “I should introduce myself first. I am Racter, a former roboticist from Russia. I came here to search for a woman, named Carmen Santos.” Racter pulled out his PDA to show him a picture of her. “She is an...” Racter paused to suck in a deep breath, before he continued with gritted teeth. “Well, we had history, to say the least. I just wish to know if you had met her.”

The man lifted up his aviator sunglasses to reveal his dark red eyes. He smiled as he lowered his sunglasses. “I know of one,” he replied. “However, if you want answers, there is a price to pay.”

Racter tucked the PDA back into his coat with an impassive gaze. “Of course...” he muttered.

“It's simple of course. Ditch your old crew, Dr. Racter, and work for me. Your little crew doesn’t seem as impressive as some that I’ve met.”

Racter gave him a curious look. “What sort of work exactly? Because I'd rather not do any work related to stripping,” he said, while waving his hand around the club that was filled with drunks roaring, laughing, and whistling at the naked dancer.

“I own this place, among other things, thanks to some help from some good friends, and reliable runners and freelancers.” The man got up from his couch to stand before Racter. “And if you want to find your ‘old friend’, I can help you. Just accept the offer.”

Racter ran his hand over his unshaven face as he stared at Lionheart for a brief moment. He then turned back to the man. “As tempting as it is, your offer is too vague for me to accept, so if you'd excuse me, I must take my leave." Racter inclined his head in respect. "Thank you for your time, sir."

As he was about to turn away, the man placed a hand on his shoulder to stop him. "Take this," he said as he pulled out a VIP pass from his pocket, and pressed it against Racter's chest. "Go to the elevators there, up to the second floor. Find room B08, and pay a visit to a good friend of mine in there. She will tell you everything you need to know."

Racter narrowed his eyes as he took the pass, and looked it over. "What do you want in return?"

The man grinned, revealing his sharp white fangs behind crimson lips, proving Racter's theory correct that he wasn't a normal metahuman. "We shall talk about that once you visit her. Now then, go." He waved his hand towards the elevator, guarded by a bouncer.

Racter turned the pass over in his hand, before he nodded his head, and approached the bouncer. Once he flashed the pass, the bouncer stepped aside, to allow him and Koschei to enter the elevator. He eyed the number of floors of the building, noticing there was a basement and three other floors.

Racter stepped out of the elevator, noticing how surprisingly clean the halls are. He read each room number carefully, until he stopped before B08, with the bottom part of the B chipped away, making it look more like an R.

He exchanged a glance with Koschei, before he pressed down the buzzer on the panel next to the door.

No response.

He pressed it again, this time hearing a loud thud, and someone yelling.

As soon as the door open, a short woman with dark hair was about to say something, only to stop as soon as she saw Racter. Her dark brown eyes widen in shock as she stepped back. "R-Racter...!?" she gasped, which made him grin.

Koschei lunged forward to pin her down the ground with his limbs. Racter shut the door behind him as he entered her room. "It has been a long time, 'Capricious'," he spoke in Cantonese.

Koschei whirred loudly as he pushed himself against her face.

Capricious stared into Koschei's bright red lights in awe, before she realized the situation she was in. She sucked in a deep breath, before she replied, "It really has been... but you know, we're no longer in Hong Kong, Racter! Come on, speak English!"

Racter took a look around her room, noticing how much of a mess it was, with bags of garbage taking up one corner, while a pile of clothes took another. Then there was the multiple monitors, connected to a computer, jacked into a wall. In the center is a king size bed, as untidy as Capricious herself appeared to be.

Racter decided to use the bed as a seat, while Capricious was kept pinned down by Koschei. He took a moment to examine her expression, and noticed that despite how surprised she was, there was this look in her eye.

A shine. As if she was happy, instead of scared.

Racter frowned as he pulled out a cigarette stick from his pocket. "I would love to catch up with you, old friend," he spoke in English through gritted teeth, "but, after what you've done, I don't think it would be worth it."

Koschei's engine roared as he pulled out a saw to lower it down to her face. Capricious broke into fits of laughter as she watched the saw inch closer to her, until she noticed the limb twitch for a brief moment.

Without hesitation, she grabbed the limb and pulled it away from her face, surprising Racter. She then looked to Koschei's wobbling legs, and planted her hand against his body to push him off with great effort. Capricious frowned as she rose her right cybernetic hand to the saw, to let Koschei tear into it, but it barely broke through the chrome.

"You've been slacking, Racter," she said as she turned to him with a frown. "If you really want to kill me, I've would already been dead the moment Koschei pinned me down. Tell me, what happened when I left?"

Racter narrowed his eyes as he sucked on the cigarette. "What do you think, Capricious? We fell apart within a month, and I've lost everything on the Dowager Empress when we returned to Kindly Cheng. She was a little more than unhappy with your choice, and took it out on us... so, I left, to hunt you down, to make you pay with your life for leaving us."

Capricious looked down at Koschei, holding onto the limb tightly. "And you've found me." She sighed, before bringing the saw up to her neck. "Well, if that's what you want, I'll be glad to do you a favor," she said as she rose her head up to expose her neck.

Racter raised a brow, until Capricious was suddenly pulled away from Koschei, by the vampire himself. "Now, now, Ms. Santos. I know you're suicidal and all, but I need you alive. And you," the vampire turned to Racter with a grin. "Are you happy to have found your prey?"

Racter was silent as he shifted the cigarette stick in his mouth with an impassive stare.

"Right, so, now you know she is alive and well, and living with me. Do you wish to accept my offer?"

"Wait a minute, Mr. Drake," Capricious said as she turned to him with slight frown. "You had sent him here for a deal?! Why?!"

The vampire huffed as he took off his sunglasses to glare at her. "Do you know how many times you tend to burst out into tears, wishing you could go back to Hong Kong to be with your friends, every time you got drunk? Too many times! I've grown tired of it, so might as well give you a moment of happiness, by bringing your friend here instead."

Racter exhaled out a cloud of smoke. "So, you knew of me?"

"We all do, handsome," the vampire replied. "Little Miss Carmen Santos here feels very guilty for leaving you all behind. Almost always saying things like, she didn't know why she agreed, when in fact, she wanted to stay with you and the others." He huffed as he gave Capricious a pat on the head. "But now that you are reunited, perhaps you can work better than ever, having the one person you care oh so much, darling... aside from your brother."

Capricious frowned, then turned to Racter. "I... I am sorry, Racter, for dragging you into this. You could say no, if you want to."

Racter tilted his head as he took another drag of the cigarette. "Actually, I shall accept the offer," he said as he got up, to extend his hand to the vampire. "You helped me found the one person I was looking for, but don't expect her to survive for long while we're working together."

The vampire chuckled as he took his hand. "Oh, I'm aware of your nature, Dr. Racter. You're very much welcome, but I need Santos alive for a little while longer, so please refrain yourself from killing her."

Capricious' eyes shifted between the men, until it hit her. "Wait, really? You want us to work together, Mr. Drake?"

"Oh, yes, indeed, Santos," he replied, then gave Racter a wink. "My name is Ryan Drake, Doctor. And though you already know little miss short-stuff here, you have to keep one thing in mind. She is not known as 'Capricious' around these parts."

"Then, what is she known as?"

"'Llorona', or 'Cry-Baby', considering how often she broke down into tears. Anyway, I got a party to attend to. Before I go, do you wish for me to send a message to your friends, Doctor?”

“Just tell them that I have plans to stay in Seattle, since I’ve found my ‘friend’ here.”

Carmen felt Racter’s seething in anger from how he said “friend” and sunk back.

“Very well. Now then, until I give you your own room, you shall be sharing with Santos. Please do me a favor, and don’t kill her anytime soon." He then blew a kiss towards Racter, before vanishing into a dark mist.

The two stood in heavy silence, letting the smoke from the cigarette fill the air in place of the mist.

Eventually, Carmen forced herself to break the silence, "You can call me Carmen or Santos, if you prefer, Racter, when we're not working."

Racter said nothing as he tapped the cigarette to let the ash fall onto the ground.

Carmen sighed heavily as she turned to Koschei. "I know a way you can repair Koschei, but that is going to depend on how Ryan feels, or how well I do my next job. I'm... sorry."

"Be quiet, Santos," he said in a sharp tone. "I need a moment to think, so if you would be so kind..."

Carmen turned to him with a scowl. "This is my room, that I'm sharing with you, Racter! You can't-" Koschei interrupted her by striking the ground right next to her foot. She glared at him for a moment, then shook her head. "Fine, fine, but this is still my room. I'll be back in a little while."

As she carefully made her way around Koschei, she snapped her fingers and said, "Oh, and don't look into my drawers."

 

Carmen ran her fingers through her dark hair as she walked down the hallway.

She stopped when she caught the scent of burning sage from behind. She turned to face a heavily bandaged woman, dressed in a beige robe and a veil around her head, holding a black cat with white streaks in her arms. "Greetings, Carmen," she said, as she scratched the cat's head. "Aries had noticed that you were having some trouble with someone, so I had to come by to check on you..."

Carmen smiled at the sight of Aries, and reached out to him with her left hand. "Good kitty," she cooed. "And he is right. I am."

"Shall we have some tea and talk about it?"

"Since my new, temporary roommate decided to take my room for himself, I'd see why not. Let's go, Valerie."

Though her smile was covered in gauze, Carmen caught a glint of happiness in her eyes. She then followed the shaman to her room, even though she despise the scent of sage.

 

Carmen nodded her head as she took the hot cup of tea into her hands. Once she took a sip, the strong spice of ginger, and bitterness of the powder took over her senses briefly, overwhelming her, until it settled down. "I can't wait until I have to take some sort of drug test, and see what comes up, Valerie," she said with a brief laugh.

"Not all drugs are bad, Carmen, but, I assure you, I didn't put any sort of drug in the tea."

Carmen chuckled as she eyed the Cat totem sitting on the shelf high above them, watching them. Memories of Gobbet flashed through her mind, before she shook her head to keep her attention on Valerie. "It doesn't matter anyway, since Ryan doesn't care about what we do in our personal lives, only what we do when we work. If we succeed, good, great, we get paid. If not, well, that's just too bad, get your ass to work around the club, if you are capable enough to get paid."

Valerie ran her fingers through Aries' fur, while taking a sip of the tea through her gauze. "He only does that to you, doesn't he, considering your knowledge of technology, machinery, et cetera?"

Carmen groaned with a slow nod. "Well, if you have skills, why not put it to use? Otherwise, it would be a waste of potential, or what have you..." Carmen took another sip of the tea. "Ryan Drake is a pain in the neck, but at least he gave me a place, plus a second chance at something that I felt much more comfortable with, than what I... What I..."

"What you'd thought was the best for you and your brother." Aries did not purr as she continued to pet him. "Whatever happened is in the past, Carmen. Please, don't beat yourself up for it. I've already witnessed you try to take your own life because of your guilt and regrets, but if it wasn't for Brimstone, you wouldn't be alive right now..."

"Then you became my therapist, in a way." Carmen chuckled, before taking another sip. "Ah, I am just kidding. You are a good friend, Val. Thank you."

Valerie laughed briefly as she bowed her head to Carmen. "It is no problem, Carmen. Remember, I'm always here for you."

"As you have been." Carmen rose up her cup of tea in honor. "Cheers."

Valerie did the same with hers, and tap the cups together gently. "Cheers."

 

Carmen couldn't believe that Racter was here in Seattle, but when she returned to her room, and saw him sleeping on her bed, while Koschei seemed comfortable on top of her pile of clothes, she had to.

Even though she knew better than to sleep next to a person who wants her dead, it was still her bed. She eyed Racter as she crawled under the covers, and laid on her stomach.

As she shut her eyes, she heard a click, and felt something press against her head.

She slowly turned to Racter as he moved the gun under her chin.

She stared into his cold glare silently, before she gave him a smile. She rose her hand up over his own, and tapped her finger against his that held the trigger. "Do it, Racter. Ryan has eyes and ears everywhere, but it takes less than a second to blow my brains out."

Racter held onto the gun tightly, as he watched her smile. He then pulled the gun away from her and placed it on the nightstand next to him. "Tell me, have you been diagnosed with depression, Santos?"

"I can't say, Racter." Carmen shut her eyes as she turned away from him. "I can't go to some psychiatrist and be diagnosed, as long as I don't have my SIN and work as a criminal."

Racter let out a brief laugh. "How ironic, Santos. You worked so hard to get your life back, and now, look at you. You live in a strip club, for what? Sexual favors and work?"

Carmen shot up from the bed to stare at Racter in disbelief. "What?! No! I am not doing sexual favors! I'm doing work in general! Maintenance, thievery, murder, whatever is on the list, except, sexual favors! I've told Ryan Drake that I will not do any sort of work involving that!"

"But without your uterus, you have such a wonderful opportunity."

Carmen growled as she laid back down. "That was out of my power, Racter."

"Of course... the tumor." Racter chuckled as he shut his eyes. "But, I do have to point out one thing: you have quite a collection of 'toys'."

Carmen wanted to kick Racter out of her bed in that moment, but this strange comfort she felt being next to him after so long made her have second thoughts. "I've told you not to look through my drawers..."

"But, I couldn't help but be curious, Santos... Unless it was something vital, you've always shared your secrets with me."

She scoffed. "Says the man that wants to kill me. Why do you even care, if you hate me so much?"

"Because I have to know who you have become, Santos, after so long..." He sighed heavily as he tried to relax. "Anyway, I'm quite exhausted, so let's talk more in the morning. Good night, Santos."

Carmen pursed her lips as she adjusted the pillow under her head. "Good night... Racter."


	2. Lust for Life

Racter opened his eyes to the sight of an unfamiliar ceiling, then turned his head slowly to the side, to see that there was no one there. At least, not anymore, he thought, as he ran his hand over the sheets that have become cold, thanks to the open window that allowed the Autumn wind inside.

He then felt a tingle in his spine as Koschei slowly rose up from under the pile of clothes, that seemed to have been thrown on top of him when they were sleeping. Racter chuckled from the sight of a bra hanging from his limbs, before he slowly got off from the bed.

Racter pulled the bra off from Koschei, and tossed it on the bed, before going to the bathroom to take a shower.

It felt pleasant to feel hot water run down his body after so long, that washed away all the grime, dirt, dead cells, and more that were stuck on him down into the drain. Unfortunately, he didn't have an extra set of clothes, so he had to wear his old, tattered ones until he could buy some when he gets the chance.

He then hung Carmen's towel over the bed post, before he left the room with Koschei close behind.

 

"All right, lady and gentleman!" Ryan shouted from behind the bar, to draw both Valerie and Brimstone to him. "I think it's time for a new bet, don't you both think?"

"Wait, where's Carmen?" Valerie asked.

Ryan gave her a wide grin as he poured a glass of water for her and Brimstone. "Here is the thing, Val, the bet involves her, and her old friend."

Valerie blinked, and was about to say something, until Brimstone spoke, "You want a bet over how long it takes until they sleep together." The troll let out a snort, as he ran his fingers over his long, red beard. "I give it... at least a week."

Valerie was taken aback, while Ryan replied, "I'd think a month at least. What about you, Val?"

Valerie shook her head with a huff. "I can't believe you guys are taking a bet on this... I give it at, oh... never! The man wants to kill her, not sleep with her!"

Ryan laughed as he picked up a vial of blood from under the counter. "Ah, my dear, sweet, Valerie, you are aware of how strong Santos' sexual drive is, don't you? She may not have sex with anyone since her time here, but with this man..." Ryan took a sip of the vial from the bottle. "Oh, I can feel something between them."

"I think you just want to sleep with him yourself, Ryan," Valerie scoffed.

"You're not wrong there." He gave her a wink.

Brimstone shook his head, then noticed Racter coming in from the elevators. "Well, I still say a week. If not, I will give you one thousand nuyen for it, Ryan."

"Very well. Val?"

Valerie paused as she eyed the silver haired man approaching them. "Okay, fine, I'd bet it will happen in two months! Now then, if you'd excuse me, I got to go back to my room." She picked up the cup to swallow it all in one breath, then gently placed it back down on the counter. "I don't feel comfortable around this man."

Ryan gave her a salute as he watched her walk away. He then turned to Racter with a smile, and pulled out a drink from the counter. "So, how was your first night here?"

Racter declined the drink by gently pushing it back before he replied. "Surprisingly pleasant. The mattress was rather comfortable, despite my companion."

"Who, Santos, or your drone?"

Racter chuckled. "Santos, of course. Speaking of, where is she? I did not see her when I woke up."

"Oh, I have her working on our equipment in the basement. If you wish to join her, all you need is this." Ryan pulled out a key card from his pocket, to pass onto Racter.

"If you break anything down there, you will have to deal with Brimstone here," Ryan pointed at Brimstone, who Racter recognized from last night. “But, I’m sure you know how to behave, handsome.”

Racter grinned as he flipped the key card between his fingers. "I promise you that I won’t break anything. But, before I go, I must ask, do you provide jobs for us, or do I have to go to someone else for them?”

Ryan gave him a confident smile. "I have plenty of connections, so if anything comes up, I will be glad to send it your way. Other than that, you can also work on maintenance with Santos for some pay. I'd appreciate it."

"Very well. I shall go to the basement to see what I can do."

"Again, don’t break anything… and anyone down there.”

Racter chuckled as he walked away back to the elevator.

"Definitely by the end of the week," Brimstone spoke up, once Racter entered the elevator.

 

Once he took a step out of the elevator, Racter heard a whir, and looked up at the turret hidden away in the corner of the ceiling. He had to admit it's not a bad idea, even though anyone who is clever enough will know its there, before they even step outside.

He then heard a click as he took another step forward, and saw more turrets appear from the ceiling. Racter sighed as he decided to walk back into the elevator, until he heard footsteps coming towards him.

"Ah, hey, Racter," Carmen greeted him, before opening a panel to access the Matrix and allow the system to recognize his face and name, along with Koschei. "That should do it..." she said, as the turrets turned away immediately. "Now then, do you need anything?"

Racter stared at her right arm for a moment, noticing there was something odd about it that he didn’t notice before. She also didn’t change out of the clothes she’d slept in last night, which happens to be her uniform, he believed. "I came down here to take a look... Are you the only one who works on maintenance?"

Carmen shook her head as she closed the panel. "No, but, Ryan prefers to have me keep things in check, before he sends actual maintenance workers down here. Anyway, want breakfast? A sandwich? Whatever?"

"What do you have, Santos?"

"Not what I have, but what Ryan provides, which ranges from simple sandwiches, to like full blown meals, if you have nuyen to spend. So, what do you want?"

Racter huffed as he walked behind Carmen to take a look around the basement. "Perhaps something simple, such as eggs and bacon."

"Okay then," Carmen stepped into a small area where there were kitchen appliances all set up, and a vending machine on the side. "Ryan likes to keep things sorted, so we have to be careful down here." She opened up a refrigerator to take out four eggs, and slices of bacon.

"Ryan had warned me already before I came down here.”

Carmen chuckled as she turned to Racter briefly, before she set the ingredients down. "So you get the idea.” She cracked the eggs, and let them sit in the frying pan for a while. "Speaking of, Ryan tends to hold bets with the others, and if I have to assume one thing, I think there is one already."

"Really now? What kind of bet do you think it is?"

Carmen gave Racter a wry smile, before she turned back to the eggs. "Perhaps how long it will be until we have sex."

Racter let out a brief laugh. "Pardon?"

"You've heard me, Racter."

"But, Mr. Drake knows that I want to kill you, not… have _sex_ with you."

"Oh, Racter, Ryan adores drama, and he can't help but talk about how intense and beautiful hate sex is, because of his own experience."

Racter frowned, while Koschei's limbs clicked against the ground, before dragging it across the floor. "What do you propose, then, Santos?"

Carmen dropped the bacon into the pan. "Just wait it out. No one is going to get any money, nor the satisfaction of being right, with me involved."

"At the sacrifice of your own satisfaction?"

Carmen laughed briefly. "Have you already forgotten about my 'toys', Racter?"

"But you wouldn't dare use them while we share the same room, would you?"

Carmen said nothing as she let the eggs fry.

Racter frowned as he approached her, and picked up a knife from the collection of silverware. He then raised it up to her neck, which amused her. If Ryan wasn't so concerned about her life, Carmen would had long been dead.

A sigh escaped from Racter, as he stood behind her, and tapped the edge of the knife against her left arm, then her right, which clicked against the metal hidden underneath her uniform. "May I see it?"

Carmen pinched the tip of the knife with a smile. "Only if you put this down."

As soon as he placed the knife down, Carmen rolled up her sleeve to reveal the metal arm underneath. Racter tapped his finger against the chrome, before giving Carmen a look. "An accident or...?"

"I lost it in an accident." She rolled down the sleeve, before flipping the egg over. "The doctor who replaced it used to work here, until she was caught up in something family related." Carmen clicked the stove off, and picked up a plate to put both the bacon and eggs onto the plate. "Here you go, Racter, enjoy. I got some things to do, but you are free to help if you wish. If not, you can take a look around the basement to see what Ryan has stored away in here. I'd think you be impressed."

Racter watched her walk away as soon as he took the plate. He picked up a fork before he followed her out of the kitchen. "How did a HMHVV infected person like Mr. Drake own a bar? People must either be really ignorant, or choose to ignore that about him."

Carmen chuckled as she picked up a ladder to take it another spot. "From what I've heard, Ryan bought this bar some years back, because he adored this one bar called The Streamstresses Union somewhere in Redmond." She placed the ladder down below a panel, and climbed up towards it to open it and check the wiring.

Racter took a bite of the eggs as he watched her work. "Bought it?" he asked.

Carmen looked down at him with a smile, and shrugged. "He has quite a history, from what I've been told, but I can't say they are true stories. Ryan Drake gets off on drama and gossip, though, so whatever you've been told, do take it as a grain of salt." She turned back to the panel to close it, and climbed down from the ladder.

"I shall keep that in mind, Santos," he replied, before he decided to sit down and eat.

Carmen gave him a look for a moment, before turning away to carry on with her tasks.

 

Racter washed the plate and put it away, then walked out to see Carmen standing next to the elevator.

"Listen, I know that you hate me and all, but you look like you need some new clothes. Since I've finished, want to go shopping?" She then pointed at her cheek with a smile. "You also look like you need a trim, Racter."

He frowned as he ran his fingers over his beard. "Are you going to be the one who pays for everything?"

"I would be glad to."

"Even though you have to know this won't change a thing between us?"

Carmen rolled her eyes with a scoff. "Do you want to go out, or not?"

Racter grinned with a nod. "Yes, I would love to."

 

"Now, don't get me wrong, Racter, shopping has been fun with you and all, but... do you really need all of this?" Carmen asked as she looked over many bags next to her legs. It made her cringe when she checked the receipts themselves. It nearly reached over ten thousand nuyen in total.

"Clothing, tools for cyber and Koschei, razors, et cetera..." Racter shrugged. "If it wasn't for the fact that you made me lost everything several months ago, you wouldn't be so worried about money."

Carmen made a face before she stuffed the receipts into her pockets. "I hate myself too, Racter, but I can't go back in time to correct my mistake... I had to accept what I had done..."

Racter clicked his tongue while wagging his finger at her. "Don't you dare think that I'd accept your... 'mistake' myself, Santos, because it's not a mistake. I remember exactly what you had said, word for word. 'I want to get my old life back. I want _our_ lives back.' You and your brother's lives." Carmen sank into her seat as he continued to berate her in a calm manner that masked his rage. "You can pity yourself as much as you want, and say what you will, but understand this: nothing will be the same as it was before."

Carmen gritted her teeth, until she yelled at him with tears in her eyes. "Then do me a favor, and kill me already!"

Koschei's engines roared, while Racter gave her a bitter smile.

"How pleasant the thought is, to rip and shred you apart," Koschei's spread his limbs far apart, "to see you cry and scream and beg for me to stop," Koschei's bright red sensors glared at her, "until you're suddenly quiet, and become nothing more, than just a fleeting memory that I will forget. Ah, how satisfying it would be..."

Racter placed his hand on Koschei's chassis to calm the drone down.

Carmen narrowed her eyes at them while she held her breath. It took her a minute to realize that Koschei was back to normal.

She exhaled in disbelief, then noticed that Racter's smile had eased into amusement.

"Unfortunately, I can't kill you, as long as we work together. Now then." Racter got up from his chair and picked up some of the bags. "Let's go back to the club, Santos."

 

It felt strange for Carmen to stay in the room while Racter changed his clothes.

It wasn't exactly uncomfortable, but surprising to her. Perhaps he didn't care, because of their history together. Or maybe, he wanted her to see the scars on his body, and damage to his cybernetic legs, to make her feel even more guilt.

Whatever the reason was, she noticed it, and asked, "Racter... do you want me to fix your legs...?"

He glanced at her briefly, before resuming to button up his shirt. "Can you?"

"I've have learned what I could from the doctor who used to work here, and I would be glad to help, if you're comfortable with it."

Racter saw the small smile that crept on her lips on her reflection in the mirror, then looked at himself as he ran his hand over his recently shaved face. "Very well. I want to see what you're capable of, Santos."

Carmen chuckled briefly. "Okay. We can do it tomorrow morning."

"Why not tonight?"

"Because it's almost time for Ryan to open the strip club, and I'd rather not get involved in any funny business down there."

Racter chuckled as he turned to her. “You don’t want to involved with questionable business, even though you work and live in a strip club, Santos?”

"It may be a strip club, but Ryan treats everyone who works for him well, and anyone who dares mistreats the strippers and workers will pay for it, dearly." Carmen got up from the bed to approach the pile of clothes that Koschei rested on. She carefully picked up a set of clothes, and gave the drone a wink, before stepping inside the bathroom. "Loyalty over business."

Racter hummed thoughtfully. "I suppose I can understand that... but what about relationship between co-workers?"

"As long as we don't kill each other, we're fine."

"Much like how he doesn't want me to kill you?"

"Pretty much."

 

As soon as she stepped out of the bathroom, she nearly tossed the uniform over Koschei, until he turned to her with a loud whir. She chuckled briefly as she decided to toss the uniform on the floor instead, and plopped down on the bed.

Racter laid next to Carmen as she pulled the sheet over her body.

Aside from the clicking sound of Koschei's limbs, as he pulled Carmen's pile of clothes closer to him, there was silence.

Carmen shut her eyes, while Racter stared at the ceiling.

She wasn't sure what to say, or do, except reach out to touch his arm.

As he turned to her, she tried to retreat it, only to be stopped as he grabbed her wrist. Carmen kept her eyes shut, while he moved closer to her.

Familiar emotions started to churn deep within her. She struggled to ignore them, while Racter held her tightly in his grip.

"Please..." she whispered to him. “Let me go..."

Racter stayed silent as he released her. He watched as she curled up under the covers.

"Do you think he had done this on purpose?" he asked her in a hush tone. "To put us in the same room, to torment you?"

Carmen laughed. "Of course he would... Ryan knows me well enough, to poke me in the right spots to get the right reaction..." She sighed. "But, if I understand him as well, he doesn’t expect us to have sex within the first week.”

"Then when you do think it would happen?"

"That would depend on both of us."

Racter traced Carmen's figure over the covers with his hand, making her squirm. He then pulled his hand back with a smile and laid his head down against the pillow. "Very well then... Good night, Santos."

Carmen huffed out a heavy sigh, before she poked her head out to breathe. "Good night... Racter."


	3. Doctor! Doctor!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _[Please don't go no please don't go_  
>  _Cause I don't want to stay here on my own...]_  
>   Doctor! Doctor! by the Thompson Twins

Carmen woke up in the middle of the night to the sound of her PDA beeping. As she got up, she realized how close she was to Racter, and quickly backed away from him to pick up the PDA from the floor. When she noticed it was Duncan calling, she got up from her bed to walk out of the room and answer.

"Hello, Duncan... Why are you calling so late at night?"

Duncan let out a heavy sigh, before he replied in a very weary voice, "I was wondering if you're still alive... which seems to be the case, so that's good to know."

"What the hell do you mean?" she asked, almost growling at him.

He paused. "He's here in Seattle, Carmen. Racter. I thought you should know, since I've met him about a week ago."

Carmen blinked, then laughed. "Ah, really now?"

"You knew?"

"’Knew,’ Duncan? He's here! Living with me in Club Sanguine! How could you not tell me that he was here in the first place, huh?!"

Duncan growled. "I just thought it was better for you to not know... but... I guess things turned out differently... well... Good night, Carmen."

Before she could say anything, he hung up, fueling the rage within Carmen. She wanted to yell, but instead, she gritted her teeth as she entered her room. She placed her PDA on her desk, before she stripped off her clothes as she stepped into the bathroom to take a shower.

 

Once she calmed down and washed up, she stepped out to be hit by the strong scent of tobacco in the air. Carmen quickly took her towel to wrap herself up, as she eyed Racter with a frown. "So, you’ve met with Duncan... is that how you found me?" she asked.

Racter had his back to her while he smoked. "Not exactly, Santos. He told me where you could be, but not where you live. It was a surprise to me to have found you here instead."

It was hard to swallow that Duncan had sent Racter her way, but at the same time, he may had derailed him on purpose. Was he doing it for her safety? If so, why didn't he warn her? Or perhaps, Duncan didn't care would happen to Carmen enough, and just told Racter for his own sake.

She sighed heavily as she tried to picked her clothes from the pile underneath Koschei, only for him to whir at her, and pull in the pile closer to him. Carmen laughed. "Racter, can you please get Koschei off my clothes? I need to get dressed."

"Ah, but isn't being naked apart of the job here?" he replied.

"Not for me, it isn't. Now, please, can I at least get my panties and bra on? And the rest of my clothes?"

As he inhaled the cigarette smoke, Koschei slowly climbed off from the pile, to let her pick her clothes, and slip them on. Once she was done, the drone settled back into place, which made her wonder if he is going to keep doing that, even after Racter gets his own room.

Then it hit her, and with a grin, Carmen climbed back into bed. "You know, he isn't going to give you your own room," she said.

Racter turned his head slightly with a raised brow. "You mean that Ryan has other rooms available, but he doesn't want me to be in a separate one, because putting us together amuses him more than anything?"

"Exactly."

He scoffed before he got up and threw the cigarette out the window. "Of course. Well, then, I suppose there is nothing we can do about it." Racter laid back on the bed and closed his eyes. "What does he really want from us, Santos?"

"He doesn't want me dead, but he does expect us to have sex at some point," Carmen continued as she tucked the pillow under her head. "In all honesty, I believe we can manage ourselves well, but it depends on you, as much as it depends on me." She turned to him with worry behind her eyes. “If I may ask… are you okay with... being 'friends' again, and pretend you’re not here to kill me?"

Racter paused to think it over, then shrugged. "Until I can take your life, then yes, I believe we could be... 'friends' again."

"Okay, good... nice." Carmen let out sigh of relief, before she shut her eyes. "I promise you, I will allow you to kill me when we're done, okay? Just... be patient, Racter."

He chuckled deeply. "I've been very patient, Santos... _Very_ patient."

Carmen's lip curled out of amusement. "Then you can wait a little longer, Racter. Good night."

\---

Carmen felt oddly restless when she woke up again. It didn't take her away from doing what she needed to do however, and went down the club floor to go speak to Ryan as he relaxed on the couch in the corner. "Hey, Mr. Drake, I need to ask you about something, if you don't mind."

"You want access to Dr. Moira's floor, don't you? To help your 'friend'?"

"Yep," she replied with a nod. "Didn't think that you would simply allow me inside, so I have to ask, got a job for me? I promise I will do almost anything, if you allow me to go and use Moira's equipment once I'm done."

Ryan pursed his lips as he took off his sunglasses and stare into Carmen's eyes. He then smirked as he slipped the sunglasses on. "Considering yourself lucky, Ms. Cry-Baby, I got a job for you."

Carmen cringed as he called her 'Cry-Baby', before shaking her head to dismiss it. "All right, send me to the information, and I'll check it once I'm done with maintenance down in the basement."

"Actually, my dear, don't worry about maintenance for today. Here." Ryan took out a thin parcel from underneath his couch, and gave it to her. "Go to the location written on the paper inside, and do the job that it’s also written on it, okay? Once you're done, I will allow you inside Moira's medical room. Oh! And bring your friend along! Maybe he will enjoy the sights of Seattle."

Carmen chuckled as she tucked the thin parcel under her arm. "Okay then..."

 

"That's a new look for you, Santos," Racter said, as he looked over Carmen's mask, with a smiley face drawn over it. "Smart too."

She wasn't sure if Racter was being sarcastic, as she adjusted her hoodie over her head. "It has worked for me so far, in keeping my identity a secret. I don’t know about you though, with your… everything,” she said as she waved her gloved hands over his general direction, which made him laugh.

Once the train had arrived to their destination, Carmen took Racter by the arm to drag him out into the city. "Let's go do our job, Racter."

 

After hacking the cameras, sneaking by some guards, and climbing up some stairs, the two finally arrived to the floor written on the paper.

Carmen used her PDA to see no sign of guards or anyone in particular.

She then turned to Racter with a thumbs up as she approached one of the doors, and hacked into the panel to open it using her board. A chuckle escaped from her as she slipped inside, and sat on the chair. She then set up her board to jack into the Matrix. "I trust you to watch my back, Racter," she said as she lifted up the cable to her head.

"I will do my best, 'Llorona'."

Carmen giggled before she plugged the cable into her datajack, and felt her entire mind get dragged out of her body, into the digital world that is the Matrix. She wasted no time to float around the void in search of data, while avoiding security within.

Eventually, when she found the file, she skimmed through a list of people that worked in the building. One name in particular caught her eye. Catherine Talon.

Carmen forced herself to close it, take the data, then jacked out as soon as possible. She tried to get up, only to fall back down from dizziness and nausea. "God... damn it... Racter...?"

For a moment, she thought he wasn't in the room, until she felt a hand on her shoulder, making her jump and turn to look into his impassive eyes. Carmen let out a sigh of relief, before she noticed her mouth was salivating in a bad way. She lifted up her mask to cover her mouth, to keep whatever she ate inside, but knew she couldn’t, and pointed at a nearby trash bin.

Racter quickly picked it up and gave it to her for her to empty her stomach out. He huffed as he turned away. "Are you okay?" he asked, once she calmed down.

"Y-yes... more or less... but... I... I need to throw this out."

Racter looked at her with a raised brow. "You're seriously not thinking about taking it with us?"

She forced out a laugh as she slowly got up. "No..." she slowly walked up to a nearby window to force it open, and tossed the bin out. "There we go... no evidence left behind... though, I'm sure they are going to realize they are one bin less." Carmen shrugged before she lowered her mask. "Let's get out now, and get this to Ryan."

 

As they were about to reach the exit, Carmen spotted a woman walking down a hallway. She stared at her, before she turned away to leave with Racter close behind.

"Do you think I haven't noticed, Llorona?" he asked.

She said nothing as she lead them out.

"Who was that person you were staring at?"

"Catherine Talon..."

Racter gave Carmen a questioning look. "That name sounds familiar..."

She let out a snort. "She once was someone important to me a long time ago... and was the one who threw me into prison." Once they exited the building, Carmen took off her mask to take in the air. "To think, that she has become a successful businesswoman, Racter... after all she has done before... It's... unfair."

"Ah, right... I'm surprised you decided to not kill her, Llorona..."

"Well, despite how much it screwed me up big time, Racter, I found myself happy at some point, with where I was... only to throw it all away, on an impulsive, stupid decision..." Carmen paused, then shook her head as she placed the mask back on. "Anyway, it doesn't matter. Let's get back to the club."

 

On the way to Club Sanguine, Racter noticed that Lionheart was standing right around the corner. He exchanged smiles with him as they passed him by, and entered the club through the front entrance.

Carmen pulled down her hoodie before taking off her mask, and yelled into the air, "Hey, Ryan! We're back! I got the data for you!"

Ryan appeared for them in a dark mist, and extended his hand with his polished fingernails, coated in magenta polish and with small white rhinestones on each one. He gently took the flash drive from her, before giving her a wide smile. "Nicely done, as always my dear Cry-Baby. I'll give you the money once I'm done," he continued, before vanishing.

"Wait! What about the keys!?"

"What key?" a woman spoke up, making Carmen jump.

She looked over to a red haired woman, with freckles on her nose. She was not much taller than Carmen, and bulkier too. At first glance, Racter thought she seemed friendly, until she said, "You don't seriously think you're going to use my equipment without my permission, do you, Carmen?"

Carmen flinched from her scolding tone, then sighed as her shoulders slumped. "I really need to use it, Dr. Moira. It will help my friend and I a lot."

Moira looked over to Racter with a frown. "That 'friend'?" she scoffed. "I've heard things about you. I don't appreciate the thought of you using my equipment for yourselves."

Before Racter could say anything, Carmen stepped forward while lifting up her sleeve to reveal her cybernetic arm. "You did this for me, Moira, so I don't plan to mess with your things if it wasn't for serious matters. You see, Racter here is heavily modified with cyber, starting from the waist down. I just want to make sure that everything is in working order with him, and his drone, since he needs repairs."

Moira stared down at Racter with narrowed eyes, before looking down at Koschei. She huffed as she turned away. "Come on then, you two. You need to be taught a few things, before I’d allow you to use my equipment."

Carmen smiled as she turned to Racter, and signaled him to follow her.

 

Moira lead them to a locked door in the basement, and slipped a key card into the slot, before putting in a password. It then opened to reveal a large room, with all sorts of medical equipment ready to be used, along with cyber and machine parts. Carmen noticed how surprisingly clean the room was, as if someone had been tending to it since Moira left.

"Get the man on the bed," Moira ordered as she approached the medical bed. "And get yourself ready, Carmen. You are going to help me with him."

Carmen exchanged looks with Racter. Though he seemed indifferent on the surface, there was this hint of amusement in his eye as he looked at her. "Should I strip down?" he asked.

"You have to if you want to get your legs fixed," Moira replied. "You can wear a gown if it makes you comfortable."

Racter chuckled as he started to unbutton his shirt, while making his way to the bed. Carmen didn't realize she was staring, until Moira called out to her to change into scrubs.

 

Carmen noticed how relaxed Racter seemed as he laid back. "Cold?" she asked.

"A blanket would do nicely, Santos," he replied with a wry smile.

She chuckled as she took out a blanket from within a box, then draped it over his chest. "Get cozy, Racter. I promise to be gentle with your cyber." She then heard a click, and looked down to see Koschei eyeing her.

"I certainly hope so, for your own sake, Carmen."

"I'd prefer if you both don't flirt while we work," Moira said as she brought up a cart covered in tools. "Though, I guess I don't have to worry, since you will be sedated."

"Sedated?" Racter scoffed. "I prefer to be awake during the procedure, if you don't mind."

Moira raised a brow, before she turned to Carmen. She gave her a shrug as she said, "Doesn't matter to me."

"It should matter, Carmen, if you want your patient to not die from shock."

"I understand, Dr. Moira, but he can handle it, I promise."

"But-" "I don't mean to be rude, Doctor," Racter interrupted, "but I assure you I will be fine. I trust that Santos will do her job well."

Moira looked between them with a raised brow, then sighed. "Fine." She pushed the cart towards Carmen, and stood beside her. "Remember, Carmen, don't break anything."

She chuckled. "If it's Racter, I can handle it. Now then, shall we get started?"

Moira nodded as she picked up a tool, to pass it over to her.

 

Within the next hour, Moira stood behind Carmen, as she worked on Racter's cyber. She couldn't help but smile as they spoke during the procedure, with him guiding her, instead of Moira herself.

She also noticed how gentle Carmen was with him, in a intimate way, with how she touched and handle the chrome, especially with his clawed feet.

 

It took a few hours until they were done, and helped Racter on his feet. Carmen held onto him as she helped him test out his cyber by walking with him. He hummed in appreciation once he noticed it was in better condition than before. "Thank you, Dr. Moira," he said as he turned to her.

"Why thank me, when you should be thanking her?" Moira replied as she pointed at Carmen. "I didn't know that she knew you so... intimately, for the lack of a better word."

Carmen chuckled. "We have history... but..." She turned to Racter with a small smile. "To say the least, I really screwed it all up, didn't I?"

He smirked. "To say the least, yes, you did. But, I suppose I should be thankful for your help. I was afraid you would make a fatal mistake, but you knew better than I'd thought. You’ve learned a lot since I’ve last taught you myself."

Carmen giggled sheepishly as she felt her cheeks grow hot. "I was taught by the best Doctors."

Moira rubbed her chin, taking in Carmen's glow, before she noticed that Racter seemed indifferent to her, despite his smile. There was no hint of pride, or any positive emotion in particular in his eyes. It unnerved her, but she didn't want to say anything, because of how happy Carmen was for once.

Which reminded her of something, so she cleared her throat to get Carmen's attention. "Since I have a kid, I can't move back in Club Sanguine, but I will trust this place to you and Valerie, okay? I will be coming back from time to time to see if things are in good condition, and if something goes wrong, let me know. And if your friend needs to repair his drone, he can use the equipment here as well, but, you have to keep an eye on him."

Moira exchanged glances with Racter as she spoke, which made him grin.

"Got it, Carmen?" she continued.

"Got it!" she replied. "Racter knows best, so you don't have to worry, I promise. But, I'll let you know if anything happens."

Moira frowned slightly, before she shrugged. "Sure. Feel free to fix up your drone, while you're here, Racter."

"I will be glad to, Doctor," Racter replied with a slight bow of his head, while Koschei whirred from under the bed.

 

Racter felt like a new man by the end of the day, and was satisfied with his work on Koschei, after not being able to repair him for so long. "Dr. Moira is quite a reliable woman, isn't she?" he asked, as he turned to Carmen while she stripped off her clothes.

"Yep, she is. And single, if you want to know," she replied as she slipped on some comfortable clothes for the night. "But, do be careful, Racter. She bites."

Racter chuckled as he pulled out a cigarette stick from his pocket. "Like you?" he replied, before lighting it up.

Carmen let out a brief laugh. "It helped get you off at that time," she pointed out. "Anyway, how are you feeling?"

"Truthfully? Better than ever, Santos. Better than ever..." Racter ran his hand over his thigh, as he inhaled smoke into his lungs. "You haven't forgotten what I've taught you, and you've learned more about cyber since you've betrayed us."

Carmen huffed, before she sat beside him on the bed. "I really don't know why I did what I did... which isn't an excuse, by the way. I just feel better if I talk about it."

"Right, of course. But, you do know you can't be forgiven either, yes?"

"I'm not looking for forgiveness, Racter... at least... not from you..."

"What do you mean?"

Carmen paused, as she entwined her fingers together. "I've been wanting to forgive myself, for what I've done... but, there is nothing I can do to accept it. I want to say, 'I'm sorry', and be freed from this guilt that is basically suffocating me, but... it isn't letting me go, nor is it killing me. What I think could, however, is myself, so... that's why I am here now. Duncan hated my choice to leave him again, to live this life, because nothing makes me feel better, than to find a way to die by another's hand... but now, that you're here... I don't have to worry."

Carmen felt a lump in her throat as she spoke, and her eyes water up. She took in a deep breath, before she continued, "I want to end it all, Racter... there... there is nothing for me in this world... in this life..."

As she broke down, Racter watched as she buried her face into her hands.

Eventually, as she laid back onto her bed, Carmen fell asleep, with her tear stained face. Racter kept smoking, up until he reached the butt of the cigarette stick, then flicked it out the window. He turned to Koschei for a moment, before he looked to the pile of garbage in the corner of the room.

He then picked them up, with Koschei's help, to throw them out into the garbage disposal outside the room. As he was about to return to Carmen's room, Racter noticed a black and white cat sitting in the corner of the hall, staring at him.

The cat was picked up by a woman dressed in a long robe, with her face hidden under her hood. She held the cat close to her, before she retreated into a door.

She must had been scared to see them, he thought, as he continued to throw away Carmen's trash.

Once he was done sorting things out in her room, except her pile of clothes, he washed his hands in the bathroom, before taking off his boots to lay beside Carmen on the bed, while Koschei sat on her clothes.

He felt nothing towards her, but he did it to repay her for her help.

Once he shut his eyes to sleep, a memory played out in his dream.

 

The first night she had slept with him, in his dimly lit workshop in the Dowager Empress.


	4. Late Night Talk

"What has brought you here, Santos?" Racter asked, as he stood near the window, with a cigarette in hand.

The image of Carmen flickered on the monitor screen, while her body laid back against the chair. As she hummed, there was static in her voice, coming from her speakers. "What do you mean exactly? Here in this part of Seattle, or how I came across this club?"

"How did you come across this club? Why did you choose to live here, and work under a vampire?”

Carmen chuckled, before she brought up an image of Duncan and her, posing in his office, and smiling with pride.

Racter noticed immediately there was no shine in her eyes, as she stood beside her brother, with her hands doing peace signs.

"It was during one of his early investigations," Carmen said. "I stuck by him at the time, to help him pick his job up from the ground, and go from there. One of the first jobs we had was related to a missing person, and one of the places they had worked at, was here in Club Sanguine."

She chuckled as she pushed the image aside, to bring up an ad for Club Sanguine. "Ryan flirted with Duncan as soon as they'd met, but Duncan didn’t approve, since he is a vampire. I don't really blame him, honestly; I don’t want a vampire to bite me either during sex." She paused. “Especially around the genitals...”

The ad dissolved into nothing, revealing Carmen once again. "That job didn't turn out well, in the end... only because, when we learned about the person's fate, I jumped into something without thinking twice, only to be caught in an accident." Carmen slowly raised up her right hand to her head, to jack out into the Matrix.

Once she returned to her body, she nearly collapsed over her table, but quickly caught herself. To her surprise, Racter placed a bottle of water down beside her. Carmen didn't question it, as she took it, and opened it to chug it all down in one breath.

She then crushed the bottle in her cybernetic hand, before placing it back down on the table. "Thanks..."

He hummed in response as he sat down on her bed, and ran his hand over Koschei's chassis. "So, that's how you lost your arm... is it also why you lived in Club Sanguine?" Racter asked.

"Yes... Despite the fact that the job was a disaster, and as much as Duncan didn’t want to, he had to trust me in the hands of a vampire, and the people who work for him, or else... well... I'd imagine you'd be very disappointed, if you've learned I've died by some other cause, instead of you."

"So, to sum it up, you live in a strip club, to repay the people who'd helped you."

"Pretty much, yeah. Duncan and I had an ugly argument, which ended with him saying that I am no longer his sister anymore. Obviously, things just haven't been the same, but... we both knew it was going to happen sooner or later. Living a life, pretending that everything that had happened, didn't, was not something I could get used to. So... I burned my SIN, willingly this time, and lived with Ryan and the others here in this club."

Racter hummed as he took one last drag of the cigarette, then stood up to crush it against the ashtray sitting on Carmen's desk. "Out of curiosity, have you ever stripped, Santos?" he then asked.

Carmen struggled to hide her blushing face, as she turned away from him, only to be stopped by Koschei as he reached out to her armrests with his limbs. She forced herself to clear her throat before she answered. "Yes... I did... once."

A wry smile played on his lips. "Was it thrilling?"

Carmen paused as she straightened herself out, and turned to him with a straight face. "More like awkward, Racter... Especially since, at that time, my entire body was coated in make-up, to hide the scars... Ryan doesn't care about cyber, because he finds that flawed people are the most beautiful, but I have too many scars on my body, that made him worry that people wouldn't find that attractive... Especially the one across my abdomen."

She sighed as she looked down at Koschei. "After we both talked about it, it was then decided that that would be the only time I would ever strip, and I would just work on maintenance instead..."

"Was there any recordings of this event?"

Carmen gave him a sharp glare, before she shook her head in disbelief. "Why do you want to know?"

"I was simply wondering, Santos... and it's amusing to think that you did something so... 'risque'."

She scoffed. "Says the man that I've slept with so many times back in Heoi."

Racter snapped his fingers, as he gave her a wide smile. "That brings up another question; you have quite a collection of 'toys', which makes me _think_ that you haven't found anyone that can satisfy you... but, _did_ you ever have sex with a person since you've been living here?"

"I've told you that I am not a sex worker before, Racter. I also haven't dated anyone, because I haven't felt happy with myself, and who wants to deal with someone like me? Everything you see before you, hasn't been touched by anyone, since I've... betrayed you guys."

Racter stared at her as she became quiet. Once Koschei stepped back to unpin her, Carmen looked up at Racter with a slight frown. “Why do you care about my life, if you hate me so much? Aren’t I just a dead person to you?”

“Since we’re working together, I believe it’s better to... ‘get along’ with you again, instead of treating you as if you’re my enemy - which really doesn’t apply to you, since you’re helping me, instead of holding me back...” Racter paused for a brief moment to think. “You haven’t changed that much, since you’ve left... well, except for your hair and arm.”

Carmen ran her fingers through her dark unkempt short hair. "It was getting too long for my liking... Anyway, with that said, I’m... kind of glad that you wish to want to know about me... It helps with this whole... ‘friendship’ thing.”

He shrugged. “As long as you don’t forget the real reason why I’m playing along.”

Carmen pursed her lips as she dropped her hands. "Y-yeah... of course... But... if I may ask, Racter... what... happened to the others?"

Racter gave her a hard stare, before he took in a deep breath. "I don't know. I left them not long after I was punished by Kindly Cheng, when she took everything I’ve worked so hard on, away."

She blinked. "W-wait, she really...?"

"Yes, really. Everyone was punished differently, but I didn't care enough to know what happened, so... I left. I took a long trip from place to another, until I found myself with a group of people, that were willing to help me get out of that country, and travel here to Seattle." He then lowered his hand down to wrap it against her neck with a wide smile. "It gave me a lot of time to think about what I would do to you, when we meet."

Carmen felt the hair on her body raise up, as she felt his warmth. She squirmed in her chair as she tried to grab him by the wrist, and push him away. "Please, Racter..." she gasped, which made him chuckle as he pulled his hand back.

"And you still ‘love’ me, after all this time..."

She shut her legs together, as she turned away from him in shame. "S-so?"

Racter laughed as he sat down on her bed. "Well, it's not like you ever said you didn't want to have sex with me, only that you don't want the others to win the bet."

"And...?" she glared at him with a frown.

He paused, then shrugged. "I suppose it doesn’t matter."

Carmen let out a sigh of relief, until she saw Koschei perk up with a whir.

"But, it would not count if I find other ways to please you, I'd think."

Carmen sputtered out into laughter with a shake of her head. "Stop messing with me, Racter! Koschei is a part of you, so yes, it does count!"

"To a certain extent. One mind, two bodies. Every click is a tingle in my spine..."

"Everytime he kills, it gives you a sense of satisfaction."

He slowly nodded his head with a cold smile. "Exactly. Besides, don't you miss having sex with someone, or something, aside from your massagers? The warm embrace of another person, holding you tightly during an orgasm?"

Carmen lifted her legs up to the chair, while Koschei began to click his limbs against the ground. She stared at Racter, hesitant to answer his questions. She cursed under her breath as she lowered her head. "Please, stop saying things like that, Racter. This... relationship between us... it's not meant to be anything more than a simple 'friendship'. I want to help you, not... have sex with you."

Racter hummed, then nodded his head. "Very well, Santos. I understand."

Koschei stepped back to climb onto her pile of clothes, letting Carmen get up from her chair, and sit beside Racter. "But... you're not wrong about me wanting to sleep with someone. I do miss feeling the touch of another person... The warm embrace... but, it makes me scared... to even think about us having sex again."

"Why, Santos?"

"I... don't know. I just am. It's been so long, Racter... and things between us just isn't the same anymore. Before, I felt as if I earned your trust, which made it so much better... even though, you didn’t seem to care all that much about sex.”

He chuckled he nodded. "You're correct; yes, I didn't have much interest, but it was entertaining. Amusing, even, every time you struggled to keep yourself from moaning."

A bashful laughed escaped from Carmen. "And you never seem to find it... titillating, either... Which makes me wonder if you've been testing that implant in your head since then..."

Racter scratched his head, before he replied, "Not as much as I used to, unfortunately, since I’ve lost my equipment"

Carmen hummed, before she gave him a small smile. "Well, I hope to help you rebuild, Racter."

"Out of kindness, or guilt?"

"Both," she replied, followed by a brief chuckle. "But... it depends on you. Do you want me to help you?"

Racter looked at her in silence, before he sighed. "I believe I can't say no at this point."

"Then, let's work together to rebuild your life, until you kill me."

"Yes... until then..."

Carmen was about to get up, until he rose his hand up to her face to caress her cheek, capturing her in his warm gentle touch. A soft gasped slipped out from her mouth, as she planted her hand over his. She cursed under her breath as she found herself drawing close to his face to plant a kiss, tasting tobacco on his lips.

She then forced herself away. "I... don’t want... to have sex..." she whispered to herself, as if she was trying to convince herself, instead of him.

“Don’t you worry, Santos; I don’t want to either, but, you did give me an answer to another question."

"W-what sort of answer...?"

"That you've been waiting for me."

Carmen stared into his impassive gaze, before she pursed her lips, and leaned into him to bury her face into his chest. "When they gave me my SIN back... it hit me... You were going to hunt me down, for being a traitor.”

He chuckled, as he ran his fingers through her hair. "You also knew how persistent I am..."

"Yeah... I’m… weird, aren't I? Waiting for you and Koschei to come kill me for the past several months? I deserve to die, for betraying your trust, Racter... Yours... Gobbet's... Isobel's... Gaichu's... and... even Duncan's... I betrayed... everyone..." Carmen started to tear up, while keeping her head down. "I don't deserve to be pitied... I don't deserve to have anything... I-" "Be quiet, now, Santos... you're starting to bore me."

She blinked then looked up him. To her surprise, he lost his smile, which was almost always rare to see.

"Let’s drop the subject now, okay, and talk about something else..."

Carmen was in disbelief, before she decided to go along with it. "Fine... let's talk about some of the things that happened here in Seattle... You know, I've learned that there was a cult a few years back... and a serial killer too! Now, I am not saying I believe all of it, but after killing a god back in Heoi, I think it's best to keep an open mind about anything that happens… no matter how bizarre it seems..."

"Right... Well, please, continue, since you've actually caught my interest again, Santos...”

She chuckled, before she pulled herself away from him. “Okay... if that’s... what you want...”


	5. La Llorona

"No, wait, stop, Racter!" Carmen shouted, as she tried to reach out to him, as they approached Ryan, who was relaxing on his couch on the dance floor. "Please! Don't!"

"Now, now, what's this?" Ryan asked as he sat up with a perked brow. "An argument between my favorite couple?"

Racter chuckled as he shook his head. "No, Mr. Drake, I'm actually here for something, if you don't mind."

Carmen tried to jump in front of Racter, only for Koschei to stop her by leaping at her, and pinning her to the ground. She tried to push him off, but the sound of his saw forced her to stop, and stare at the drone anxiously. "Please... don't do it!"

Racter ignored her cries when he asked, "You have a recording of Carmen stripping here in Club Sanguine?"

Ryan's lips curled into a wide grin, revealing his sharp white fangs. "Oh, yes, I do. Here, you go, handsome," he replied, before bringing up his PDA. He eagerly tapped away with his polished clawed fingers, then gave the rigger a firm nod, before he tucked his PDA back into his pocket.

Racter laughed as he took out his PDA to see the recording. Once he pressed play, Carmen yelled as soon as they heard music play, and people cheering, only to be silenced by Koschei as he pierced the ground next to her head. She squeaked, while Racter continued to watch.

It was almost unbelievable to see that the woman on the screen was Carmen, until she spun around a pole, and posed for the audience. Her face was hard to see, thanks to her visor, but the bizarre make-up that covered nearly all of her body, her right arm, and body shape was enough to tell him it was her. He turned to her with a grin. "Now I see why you wore a mask during our last job, Santos. This is quite amusing."

"Whatever, Racter..." she huffed. "Now that you have the copy, can you please get Koschei off me?"

Koschei whirred as he climbed off of her, and stood beside Racter, as he pocketed his PDA. "Thank you very much, Mr. Drake. I appreciate your help."

Ryan chuckled as he laid back. "Carmen is a dear, isn't she? She may be a cry baby, but she is talented. I will give her that."

"You guys know I'm standing right here, right?" she said as she waved her arms in the air.

"Yes, Santos, we know," Racter said with a smile. "It makes it so much more amusing to see your reactions."

Carmen groaned as she turned on her heel. "Screw this, I'm going to the basement."

"Be well." Racter watched her walk into the elevator, then turned back to Ryan once it shut. "Has she done anything else similar?"

"Unfortunately, no. She is quite a personal person. Never wanted a partner, for whatever reason, so she never had sex. She hasn't done anything that could be considered as raunchy, either, except have fun with herself." Ryan sighed as he adjusted his sunglasses. "But, you could change that, I believe."

Racter let out a snort. "Carmen has told me about the sort of bets you tend to hold. She assumes that the current one is based around if and when we would have sex."

"Oh? She is sharper than I've thought..."

"So, it's true."

"Very much so, handsome. Now, if you want in, you can't, considering this one involves both of you. But, you can join in on the next one. It's always a blast when it comes to bets."

Racter gave a brief low hum. "Perhaps, if I have enough nuyen... speaking of, I may join Carmen in the basement. Do you pay us equally, or do you give us half of the nuyen?"

"Equally, and by the hour of course. If you do better than I'd thought, than you can get a bonus. If you do a run, then that depends on the person who gave me the job, not me... and, unfortunately, I don't have anything at the moment. I will let you guys know when I do."

"Very well. Thank you for your time, Mr. Drake," Racter continued, before he left to go to the basement.

 

As soon as Racter stepped out of the elevator, he heard Carmen's speaking to someone. He quietly approached her, to see the robed woman from before.

"Ah, Racter," Carmen spoke up, "this is Valerie, a friend of mine. Valerie, this is Racter, the man I was talking to you about, and Koschei, his drone."

She stared at him silently, before she slowly bowed her head. "Hello..." she said, in a low muffled voice.  Once she lifted her head back up, Racter noticed that she was heavily bandaged under the hood.

"Greetings, Miss Valerie. It's a pleasure to meet you," he replied.

"Y-yes... sure... um... I'm going to my room. Take care, Carmen... Racter..." Valerie then looked down to see Koschei. "Koschei..." she muttered, before she hurried out of the basement.

Racter gave a brief hum as he watched her run out. "How much have you told her about me?"

"Almost everything."

"Even about my condition?"

"Ah... no. Well, at least, I don't think so..."

Racter turned to her with a raised brow. "You don't remember?"

She shrugged. "No. Anyway, you came here to work, right? Then, let's work."

Racter gave her a smile. "Very well."

 

"Tell me, Santos, did you create the mask that you wore before?"

Carmen blinked, while in the middle of slurping noodles. "Valerie helped me with it, actually. It was a small art project that she wanted me to get into, to help me distract myself from my problems. I've made... quite a few, but I didn't like all of them, so I threw some of them into the garbage pile, which I haven't thanked you for throwing away, by the way, so... thanks!"

"You're welcome," Racter replied.

Carmen chuckled. "Anyway, I decided to keep just one of them, which is that smiley faced one. I think it was the best one I made..."

"Interesting. In a way, it's kind of ironic, considering your nicknames, Santos."

She paused, before she opened her mouth as if something just dawned on her, making him chuckle.

"You really didn't notice?" he asked.

"No, Racter, I have not... I just thought it was the best mask to wear!"

Racter laughed. "I see. I’d thought you were self aware of it, however, especially since it’s fitting to name yourself after a myth about a mourning mother, who drowned her children in a river. ‘La Llorona’ was it?”

Carmen blinked, before she said, “Well, I didn’t notice, until now. I was willing to use any nickname, since I was told there was a well-known runner, that was also known as ‘Capricious’, some years back. If I didn't want to be confused for someone else, I had to change my alias... and Ryan insisted on calling me ‘Cry-Baby’, which I hate, so I went to the next best thing... ‘Llorona.’"

"Carmen 'Cry-Baby' Santos..." Racter muttered to himself, then paused. "Carmen 'Llorona' Santos..." He shrugged dismissively. "Interesting."

She forced out a laugh as she got up with her empty bowl. "Anyway, it doesn't matter what anyone calls me here. I'm still me, by the end of the day..."

"You're still 'Capricious'."

Carmen gave him a look, before she shook her head, and approached the sink to wash the bowl. "You say that, but even Duncan has stopped calling me that, once he knew my new alias... It's been 'Carmen' since then."

"I'm surprised you still stay in touch, despite the fact he doesn't want to acknowledge you as his sister anymore..."

"Yeah... me too. Anyway, let's head back upstairs, since our shift is over."

Racter smiled as he nodded. “Let’s…”

 

As they arrived to her door, Racter noticed Valerie standing on the other end of the hall, staring at them. Once they stepped into her room, Racter looked down at Koschei, and ran his hand over his chassis. "How close are you with... Valerie, was it...?"

"We're pretty good friends, I would like to think... but, she is scared of you, Racter."

"Oh? I couldn't help but notice, Santos."

Carmen chuckled as she shrugged. "Yes... right. Well, I think she is just scared of people in general... Except for Ryan, Brimstone, and I, since we work together."

"Brimstone..." Racter laid down on her bed, while Koschei took his place on the pile of clothes, once Carmen picked up her sleep wear. "I don't believe I've met him properly."

"Brimstone spends most of his time in a nearby gym, or working on a run, before he comes to work here. He lives here too, but he prefers to spend his time outside the club."

"Is there anyone else that lives here, Santos?"

"Well, most of the rooms here are rented by the strippers, if they feel unsafe to leave, or live far away. But, that's all I know. Ryan lives on the first floor, but loves to hang out on the ground floor most of the time. Other than that, I don't know anyone else, except for Val, Brim, and Ryan."

"I see... Anything that I should be aware of?"

"Appearances can be deceiving, so don't you dare mistreat anyone in this club, unless you want to be killed. Valerie is a cat shaman, Brimstone will beat you to death, and Ryan will drain your blood until you're dry."

"Ah..."

"Ryan prefers to have the best sort of people working under him, even though there are some exceptions... well, at least, I am one, since I owe him a lot for saving me."

"How long have you been working for Ryan?"

"At least... five to six months so far..."

Racter hummed thoughtfully. "How much longer do you plan on working here?"

Carmen blinked, before she paused, then shrugged. "I don't know. I guess that depends on Ryan."

Racter chuckled. "So, he controls everything here..."

"I guess so, in a way..." Carmen paused, before she stepped into the bathroom. "Anyway, I'm gonna go take a shower. You can use it once I’m done.”

“Thank you, Santos, and take your time. I got some planning to do...”

“Of course you do, Racter...” she said, before she shut the door behind her. "Just don't plan on anything that would get us kicked out, okay?!"

"I won't..." he replied, half-jokingly.


	6. A Deal

Racter woke up around early afternoon, to see that Carmen was already up once again. He began to wonder how early she tends to wake up, considering that she sometimes goes to sleep rather late. He then dismissed it, since it didn’t matter that much, unless they were going to do a run.

After he got ready for the day, he went down to the basement to look for her.

Once he exited the elevator, the first thing that Racter noticed, was Carmen's absence. Instead, the robe woman, Valerie, was in the medical room, cleaning up tools. "Are you... looking for Carmen?" she asked, as she placed down a scalpel.

Racter eyed her, before he answered, "Yes, I was. Do you happen to know where she is?"

"She is out doing errands, but she will be back soon... I hope."

"You hope?" Racter repeated with a slight frown.

There was a moment of silence between them, until Valerie said, "There are some men that have been looking for you, Dr. Racter... I assume that they are your old friends... if you even call them that..."

Racter ran his hand over his chin, then gave her a slow nod. "I will go look for her, if that's what you are trying to tell me, Miss Valerie."

She gave him a light chuckle. "I'm not trying to tell you anything, Doctor... but, I am worried about Carmen..." Valerie grew silent, then turned to Racter with a bottle in hand. "Just... please... go find her... and give her these." She walked up to him, with the bottle stretched out for him to take.

He noticed that there was no label on it. Only tiny round pills inside the dark capsule. "What are these, if I may ask?"

"Simple medicine, to help her... sort out... her emotions... and thoughts..." Valerie went back to cleaning the room immediately. "I'm just worried about Carmen... and even though you don't... Ryan needs her alive... we all do. You and Ryan see her as nothing more than an asset, while she is a friend to me... and I appreciate it, if you don't hurt her..."

Racter grinned as he tucked the bottle into his pocket. "Now, now, Miss Valerie, you're assuming that I am using her for my needs, when in fact, she is actually helping me out of her own free will. While I can't say that I feel anything for her, I do appreciate everything that she is doing for me. She is quite a reliable person."

"Which is why I don't like that you want to kill her. Ryan has explained to us the situation, just in case something goes awry between you two. What I do for Carmen, is out of respect... something that I assume you don't care much about."

Racter huffed out a sigh, while Koschei let out a low whir at the same time. "I will go out to find her, Miss Valerie, to ease your worries."

"Good luck, Dr. Racter."

 

"Is this all?" the convenience store clerk asked.

"May I have that pack of cigarettes?" Carmen replied, pointing at one of many boxes of cigarettes, all stacked up in rows, behind the clerk.

As soon as they placed it down, Carmen didn't realize she was actually buying a pack of cigarettes again, until she saw the box. The last time she did that was not long after she arrived to Seattle, and bought a pack subconsciously.

A sigh escaped from her, as she gave the clerk nuyen in exchange, and placed the pack into her bag of snacks and drinks. Once she gave them her thanks for their service, Carmen walked out of the store. She looked up at the sky, to see dark clouds gathering, blocking out the sun.

She raised up her hood over her head, even though she knew that the fabric wouldn't keep her safe from the rain. Instead, it soaked her clothes underneath, which stuck to her skin. Carmen tried her best to run despite the rain, until she bumped into a troll.

"Sorry, excuse me," she said, before she tried to walk around, only to be stopped.

"Tell me, girl," the man said, in a heavy English accent. He brought up his PDA with an image of Racter, setting off an alarm in Carmen's head. "Have you ever met this man?"

She focused on the image, before she shook her head. "No... I have not..."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure... If I may ask, why are you looking for this man?"

"It's personal business, miss. Thank you for lying to me."

Carmen blinked, before she heard footsteps approach her from behind. A wry smile crept on her lips. "If this is personal, then there is no reason for me to be involved," she pointed out. "I promise you, I'm not lying."

The man gave a brief chuckle as he eyed her bag. "Sure... but, we have been keeping watch over him, and found out that he actually found a woman named 'Carmen Santos'. A woman that he was looking for a very long time, and by some sheer coincidence, you happen to look like her." He then changed the image to one of Carmen, and the rest of the crew, as they stood in front of the Dowager Empress.

She felt her heart cringe, when she remember that moment. It was sometime after they defeated Qian Ya, the Yama King. Even though Duncan and her didn't feel like smiling at the time, being surrounded by the others - Gobbet, Isobel, Gaichu, Racter, and Koschei - was enough of a reason for them to smile as they did in the image.

Carmen felt a lump in her throat, which forced her to swallow hard before she said, "I'm sorry... I am not who you think I am."

"Oh, come on, you terrible liar! We know that you are her! The girl that he is looking for!"

Carmen looked behind her, to see the others tense up, but they weren't going to shoot her, yet. "I-" "Why, greetings, Lionheart. It's a pleasure to see you again."

Carmen blinked, before they all turned to Racter. He waved his hand to Carmen, to signal her to run to him, which she was more than happy to obey in that moment of confusion. He gave her a smile, as she grabbed his arm."How are we doing?" Racter asked, while Koschei stared up at the troll.

Lionheart laughed, before he shook his head. "Just fine, Racter... however, I was very surprised to hear that you decided to leave us, once you had found her... Tell me, is she that good in bed?"

"Hey, I'm not a sex worker!" Carmen shouted.

Lionheart scoffed. "Then why do you live in a strip club?"

"Because it's our home," Racter replied. "A surprisingly safe place for us to live in, and find jobs, aside from stripping that is. The owner of that club is quite resourceful, and has provided me with so much, ever since I've decided to work for him. Much more than you ever could."

Carmen looked up at Racter with a wry smile, while the others stared at him in shock. Lionheart burst out into laughter, and shook his head in disappointment. "Right.  Well, you seem happier, Racter... but, you should be careful. Especially you, girl. This man clearly doesn't care about anyone, except himself."

"You are aware that Racter and I had worked together before, right?" Carmen asked Lionheart. "You don't think I am aware of what Racter can do? Hell, we made a deal to work together, that will benefit us in our own ways!" She then turned to Racter. “Let’s go home, now.”

"No-" "Quiet!" Lionheart roared to his crew member, then gave the two a wide smile, revealing his crooked teeth, and curled tusks. "I will allow you both to leave just this time... but, don't expect I will let either of you go when we meet again."

"Thank you, Lionheart," Racter said, as he hooked his arm with Carmen’s, and walked away, with Koschei on alert right behind them.

Lionheart scoffed, before he turned away with his crew right behind him.

 

After a shower, and a change of clothes, Carmen dug into the plastic bag, to take out a pack of cigarettes. "Here, Racter," she said. "Good thing it is wrapped up in plastic, isn't it?"

He chuckled as he took the box from her hand. "Thank you, Santos. I appreciate it."

She gave him a smile, before she took out a chocolate bar. "So... what should we do?"

"About what?" he asked, while tapping the box against the palm of his hand. "Lionheart?"

"Yeah... like... I have no doubt they want to hurt me, because of you... which worries me, because I want you to kill me... not them..."

Racter unwrapped the box, and opened it to take out a cigarette stick. Once he lit it up, he took in a deep breath, then breathed out the smoke. "It goes out without saying that, you should keep your guard up whenever you go out."

"Same goes for you, Racter. You and Koschei."

He chuckled. "Then let's protect each other, until things get sorted out."

She let out a snort. "Or until I'm dead. Whichever comes first."

Racter shook his head, before he took another drag of the cigarette. "The more you say that, the less it makes me want to kill you, Santos. Do you really want to die, or are you are tricking me into not killing you?"

"No tricks, I promise. I will refrain myself from saying it anymore, if it truly bothers you."

"Good," he replied with a smile. "Very good... Oh, and by the way, here." Racter pulled out the small bottle Valerie gave to him. Carmen recognized immediately, but hesitated to take it from him.

"Can you... hold on to that for me?"

He raised a brow. "Valerie told me it was to help you, so why do you wish for me to hold on to it?"

Carmen pursed her lips as she pressed her fingers together, then sighed as she extended her hand to take her. "I don't like them. That's all."

Racter gave her a look, before he placed it down on her palm. "Don't like the idea of having to live with medicine, or is it because they taste awful?"

"It's the idea of having to live with it... I don't... want to be controlled by medicine... but it is something that helps me get up, and work. Valerie says it's not dangerous, and if I wish to stop, I can, but I will suffer from terrible withdrawals. If I do, I must go to her for help."

"Was she taught by an actual medical doctor, or did she study this sort of thing?"

"She told me she studied medicine, but got into an accident, which left her heavily scarred... since then, things just hasn't been the same for her. Eventually, she met Moira, and with her help, learned so much more than she expected. Valerie may be a shaman, but she knows that modern technology is quite important, especially when it comes to medicine. However, she does make her own type of medication, using certain types of plants, herbs, and whatever else she can get her hands on..." Carmen then whispered, "I think she also cooks certain types of drugs too..."

Racter chuckled, before he took another drag. "How interesting... so, what will you do, then? Take the medicine, or not?"

Carmen looked down at the bottle, then pursed her lips as she nodded. "Yeah... might as well..."

"Very well then," Racter said, before he knelt on the floor to pull out a box of water bottles. "Here." He took one out to give to her.

"You know, I forgot that you bought those," she said, while she opened the bottle.

"It's important to keep yourself hydrated, my friend."

Carmen blinked, with the pill half way up to her lips. "Excuse me?"

"Pardon?"

Carmen frowned slightly, before she shook her head, and took the pill. Perhaps she had misheard, she thought, while gulping down the water. "Never mind. Anyway, I'm going to lay down for a bit... these pills make me drowsy."

"Rest well, Santos."

Carmen looked up at his smiling face, and gazed into his snow white eyes. They contained no hint of warmth, just like before, back in Heoi. She then shut her eyes to sleep. "Good night... Racter."

 

Racter tucked the cigarette between his teeth, so he could bring up the cover over Carmen. Once she was settled in, he walked out of the room with Koschei close behind. He noticed Valerie standing at the hall, holding a black and white cat in her arms.

Neither one said or did anything, before Racter turned away to go to the elevator, to reach the dance floor, and approached Ryan as he stood behind the bar. "Hello, handsome," Ryan said. "What's on your mind?"

"Santos and I had met with my old crew earlier. I wish to ask if you have any plan on allowing them inside, or plan on getting them to work for you."

Ryan gave Racter a smile, before he pulled out a bottle of thick red wine. "They are allowed inside, but I have no plans on letting them join. I have a decker, a rigger, a shaman, and a brawler. Sure, I don't mind having more people join us, but that depends if they are good enough."

"I see... tell me, did you allow Santos to stay because she is good enough, or was it to repay you for your help?"

Ryan took a sip of the "wine", then let out a satisfied sigh, followed by a chuckle. "It's a little bit of both, actually. Little miss short stack is a great hacker, not to mention, she can kick some ass when she has to. Tell me, is it true that you and her fought a god together, with your crew at the time?"

Racter let out a snort, once the memory came to him, as if it happened yesterday. He then looked down at Koschei with a proud smile. "Indeed, it is."

"Ah, then I have the finest runners in my grasp! Perhaps you both could take on the tough jobs together!"

"Would they pay more?"

"Oh, you bet your fine ass it will, handsome. But, for now, I suggest you and short stuff take your time to get ready, before I send a job to you. I don't want for either of you to die."

Racter let out a brief chuckle. "Of course. But, would you also allow me to have more resources to help improve my drone?"

"Of course! You and short stuff will have the best reliable resources to build whatever you guys want to build!"

Racter stared at Ryan with a perked brow, while inhaling smoke into his lungs. "Wait," he said, letting the smoke out in a puff, "Santos has been building drones?"

"At first, she did. She said she wanted to repair a drone of hers, but after breaking it so many times, Moira and I forced her to stop. If she agrees to the jobs, then I will allow her repair the drone for as long as she wants."

Racter hummed thoughtfully, while rubbing his chin. He then nodded his head with a grin. "I will make sure to tell her once she wakes up."

"That will certainly make her happy," Ryan said, before he took another sip of “wine” straight from the bottle.

"Thank you, Mr. Drake, for your help. I will go do some work in the basement, so have a pleasant day."

"Enjoy yourself, handsome," Ryan said, and gave Racter a wave, before he returned to the elevator.


	7. Hatred

Carmen stared at the jewels in her duffle bag with a frown. She thought their next job was supposed to be challenging, but to steal some supposed valuable jewelry in some rich man's house was one of the easiests type of run. A low hum escaped from her as she zipped up the bag.

"Unhappy, Llorona?" Racter asked, as he watched the door.

"A little... I know, I shouldn't complain over a milk run, since we have dealt with worse, but I'd thought Ryan was going to give us something more than... this!" Carmen threw her arms up in the air, to show off the penthouse around them. "You'd said Ryan would give us difficult jobs! This is not difficult, not by my standards at least!"

Racter chuckled as brought his PDA out. "Let's just get this over with, Llorona. It was a clean sweep, without casualties... as disappointing as that is."

"Right, of course," she huffed.

 

The hallways were quiet, which should be normal, since it was very late at night. The only thing that could be heard was their footsteps, along with Koschei's quiet whir, as his limbs walked over the carpet. When they reached a fire escape, Carmen allowed Racter and Koschei to go out first, to watch their backs, before she followed them.

As soon as they reached the ground, Carmen looked down at the dark alley. She extended her right hand out, and whipped the air in front of her with a laser wire that came out of her cyber. A man stepped out from the darkness, with his hands up in the air. "Don't kill me, please!" he cried out.

Carmen sighed in relief as she pulled the wire back into her wrist. "Let's go," she said, as she took Racter by the arm.

Racter exchanged looks with the stranger, before he turned away.

Heavy metal music blared from the front speakers of Brimstone's van, while he watched the cars pass by. He looked at the rear view mirror when he heard the back of the van open up, and watched Carmen climb in, with Racter and Koschei.

Once the doors closed, Carmen took off her mask to wipe the sweat off her face, and breathe in the chilly fresh air. She noticed the look in Racter's eyes, as he ran his fingers over Koschei's chassis. She forced herself to turn away to ignore him, which made him smile.

Brimstone let out a snort as he adjusted the mirror. "I'm surprised that you two haven't banged, with all this... tension in the air," he said sarcastically.

Carmen rolled her eyes as she laid down on the seat. "Yeah, too bad that it hasn't happened, or else you would have won the bet..."

He chuckled as he turned the vehicle on. "Losing a little bit of nuyen won't kill me, girl, but I am surprised you haven't gotten laid, considering that you often complained about it…”

"Screw you, Brimstone!" Carmen snarled.

"Nah, I'm good." Brimstone laughed.

Racter smiled as he stroke Koschei's body.

 

As soon as they entered their room, Carmen dropped the duffel bag, before she plopped onto the bed. Racter smirked as he walked around the bed, to tap her shoulder. "Isn't it important to report to Mr. Drake?" he asked.

"You can do it instead of me, Racter..." she groaned. "Just give him the duffel bag."

Racter was silent as he sat down beside her. "Tell me, who did you expect to see in that alley, Santos?"

She turned her head slightly to look at him. "What do you mean?"

"You were on edge earlier, ready to strike out from the moment you would hear the wind blow. So, I will ask you again - who did you expect to see in that alley?"

Carmen took a deep breath, before she replied, "I thought we were being followed, that's all."

"Really?"

"Yes... You never know what to expect in this streets, Racter, even if you grew up in it. At some point, you're going to have to expect someone to come up to you, with a gun to your head, ordering you to give them your money, and your belongings if they are feeling bold enough. Hell... I'm lucky to have you."

Racter became silent when he recalled what Brimstone said to her. His brows furrowed slightly, as he backed away from her. "I shall go speak to Mr. Drake, Santos. Rest well."

"All right, see ya."

As he picked up the bag, Racter watched as Carmen moved around the bed in a fit of restlessness, before he left the room.

 

Racter arrived to the dance floor, only to find that Ryan Drake wasn't there. He went down to the basement, and saw Valerie was in the middle of cleaning it. "Excuse me, Miss Valerie," he spoke up, as he stepped out of the elevator.

She stopped briefly to look at him, and bow her head, before she resumed her work. "How may I help you?" she asked.

"Do you happen to know where Mr. Drake is?"

"I believe he is either busy with maintaining his looks, or sleeping."

"I see... Thank you," Racter said with a smile. "I shall leave you be, Miss."

"How is she?" Valerie asked, stopping him from leaving.

"Santos? I would like to say she is doing well, but she seems to be rather... restless."

"Restless...? So she hasn't been taking the medications..."

Racter grinned. "Do you think it's a good idea to repress her emotions and urges, instead of letting her express them? Don't you know that it's quite unhealthy?"

Valerie glared at him. "Don't you understand how it feels when you're lonely, but afraid? Carmen wants a partner, but you're always on her mind. She doesn't want to be with anyone else, ever since she had left you and the rest of her friends - which is the reason why you despise her, no? You want to kill her, for heaven's sake!"

Koschei roared as he readied himself to pounce, until Racter looked down at him with a forced smile. "That is between her and I, Valerie, not you."

"No!" she shouted as she threw the broom away, and approached Racter, despite the fact that Koschei was ready to kill. "You don't give a damn about Carmen, to know that she is hurt! If it wasn't for Ryan, I would had killed you myself!"

Racter stared down at her, then scoffed. "Not if I had killed Carmen first," he said as he turned on his heel. "But, as you have pointed out, we can't do anything, with Ryan around."

"Wait a minute," Valerie spoke up, "you're not planning to kill him, are you?"

Racter faced her as soon as he stepped into the elevator. "And lose this? No... no, I'd rather not. In fact, working for Ryan has benefited me more anything, and I hope that he stays in good health. The only person you should be worried about is Santos, but I promise you, that nothing will happen while we're working together. Well, nothing bad, at least." He then gave her a slight bow. "Have a good night, Valerie."

 

On the way up to the second floor, Racter and Koschei stepped aside as soon as they noticed a cloud of mist form before them. Ryan chuckled as he held the close button down. "You have something to report?" he asked.

Racter smiled as he gave him the bag. "The job was a success, but Santos couldn't help but be disappointed that you gave us such a simple task."

Ryan took the bag, then pressed the first floor button. "Come with me for a moment, handsome, I got something to talk to you about."

"Very well," Racter answered. He followed Ryan to a room at the end of the hall, that was colder than he had expected. It brought bitter memories of his childhood, even ones that he had hoped to never remember again.

"I couldn't help but notice that Valerie really hates you... now, while I understand why, because she cares about Cry-Baby and all, here's the thing - I can't have anyone killing anyone while working for me. It's bad for business."

"I apologize, Mr. Drake, I really don't wish to get involved in any sort of violence myself." Racter looked down at Koschei with a small smile. "Even though the one thing that brought me here is to kill Santos."

"Yes, yes, of course, bad blood between you two and all that, but I need you to understand this: I want you all alive. You all can hate each other, as long as it doesn't end with someone getting shanked, so, don’t. That's an order."

Racter looked at Ryan with a raised brow. "Very well... You have my word that I won't do anything that would put your business at risk."

"Good to hear. Now, do you want something to drink? I have other types of drinks aside from different types of blood."

Racter chuckled with a shake of his head. "No, thank you... but, I do wish to ask you something, if you don't mind."

"Go ahead."

"You don't happen to have the rooms bugged, do you?"

"Oh, no, no, no, that would be a breach of privacy. Why?"

Racter grinned. "No reason. I must go now, and rest. I feel as if my conversation with Valerie has drained me."

"Sure. See you around, handsome. Oh, and I'll be sending the nuyen through Carmen's computer."

"It was a pleasure doing business with you, Mr. Drake. Have a pleasant evening," Racter said, before he left the freezing room.

 

Racter was quite surprised to see Carmen sleeping half naked. Was this an habit she developed during her time here, he wondered, as he looked around the room. "Santos," he called out. "Wake up!"

Carmen groaned as she turned over on the bed.

He started to snap his fingers over her ear, while calling out her name, until she planted her hand against his cheek. "Shut up," she mumbled.

Racter grinned, as he lowered her hand. "I would, once you get yourself dressed."

Carmen opened her eyes to glare at him, until she realized that she was actually sleeping in her underwear. She cleared her throat as she pointed at her pile of clothes. "Can you give me a shirt and pants then? I would appreciate it..."

The smile didn't disappear as he reached out to her pile, and gave her something to slip into.

"And here I thought you didn't want to walk around naked..." He eyed her shirt for a moment, before he turned away to run his fingers over Koschei. "Did you often sleep without clothes before I came along?"

"Maybe... It's not that I don't trust you, but I get weird when I sleep naked..."

"Oh? How so?" he asked, with a devilish smile, making her blush.

"I just get weird... that's all..." she said as she laid back.

Racter stared at her for a moment, then climbed onto the bed to lay next to her. "Good to know... Anyway, let's get some sleep, Santos." Koschei took his spot on Capricious' pile of clothes. "Today has been quite draining..."

"Okay... good night, Racter."

"Good night, my friend..."

Carmen paused. She then took a deep breath, before she said, "Did you just... call me 'my friend'...?"

Racter frowned slightly. "Have I...?"

Carmen let out a heavy sigh as she turned away from him. "Maybe my hearing is getting worse... Even though... this wasn't the first time you called me that... since we have been working together..."

Racter stared at the back of her head, thinking. Certainly she must be mishearing him, but he couldn't dismiss that he has been calling her that again, after so long. Was this because of the conditions of their relationship? Or perhaps, it was an old habit he couldn't get rid of.

Whatever the reason was, it didn't matter. He came here to take her life, and will, once the time comes.


	8. Pomegranate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was bound to happen, knowing me... As a heads-up, sexual content ahead.

Carmen gasped when she felt a hand travel up her right thigh, and teased her sensitive flesh with gentle strokes. She wanted to see the person that held her close to their body, but it was difficult to make out anything in the dark. She decided to raise her hand up to their face, to trace their strong, chiseled jaw.

As she was about to call out their name, the figure disappeared, and fell into the darkness, only to wake up when she landed on the carpeted floor.

Carmen cursed under her breath as she tried to get up on her feet. She wasn't surprised to see Racter sleeping peacefully, while she abruptly woke up by slamming onto the floor. At least she wasn't bleeding, she thought, before she climbed back into bed.

 

No matter how hard she tried to ignore it, Carmen noticed how strong her urges became over time, when she worked with Racter down in the basement. It made her unable to focus on their work, which eventually lead him to take over the job himself, while she stood aside and watched. She felt ashamed that she allowed her feelings get the best of her.

Once he was done, Racter turned to her with a satisfied smile. "You see, Santos? That wasn't too hard."

She force out a chuckle along with a nod, before walking towards the kitchen. "I knew you would had done a great job, Racter," she said. "Now, let's go eat."

He chuckled as he and Koschei followed her. "You know, I can't help but notice that you are unusually quiet today... Is there something wrong?"

"No, not really," she replied, as she took out a couple sandwiches from the fridge, and gave one to Racter. "I just had a lot on my mind."

He gave her a curious look as they took a seat at one of the tables. "Must be something rather unpleasant, if you couldn't work today."

Carmen grinned, right before she munched on her meal. "It's not," she continued once she swallowed, "it's just frustrating... Honestly, I rather not talk about it."

"If it's frustrating, I expect that you will blow up at some point, so isn't it better to talk about it, instead of keeping it to yourself?"

She huffed. "Fine... I feel sexually frustrated. Are you happy now, Racter?"

Racter blinked, before he gave her a wide smile. "It's such a difficult urge to live with, isn't it?" he said, as he slowly reached out to brush her hair behind her ears. She shuddered under his touch, as she quickly backed away from him.

"Don't tease me like this," she mumbled. "And don't think I will say 'yes' immediately, and jump on your cybernetic dick, while I'm in the middle of eating, Racter."

He laughed as he pulled his hand away. "Very well, but I do suggest that we should have sex, just to get it over with, Santos. It’s easy to notice how much it bothers you, when others tease you about your needs. While I do wish to still kill you, there is nothing I can do, as long as Ryan is watching, so, shouldn’t you to be taking advantage of this, while you still have the chance?"

Carmen didn't want to look him in the eye, as she ate her sandwich. The food felt dry in her throat, so she forced herself off from her seat, to get some water from the faucet. She nearly jumped when she felt Koschei brush past her rear. She took in a deep breath, before she turned to face Racter with reddened cheeks. "Eat first, then we will talk, okay, Racter?"

He gave her a firm nod with a smile.

 

While there was a large party going on the dance floor, Carmen slammed her hips into Racter's, taking in his length, as he laid back on her bed. The music that blared from her speakers drowned out her moans and fits of laughter, along with her screams, calling out for him.

Even though she knew he couldn't feel it the same way she does, it didn't make it any less amazing. When she leaned forward to kiss him, Racter held her in his arms, to make her roll over, so he could take control. Carmen laughed as she wrapped her legs around him.

Racter grinned as she heard her moan into his ear. An all too familiar sound, that he hadn't heard in a long time.

It made him eager to hit her hips harder, while he started to massage one of her breasts. Carmen cursed breathlessly as she balled up the bed sheet underneath her in a tight grip. She didn't want to stop, but she could feel her insides getting wetter and tighter around his length.

She then felt her body tense up, as an orgasm overwhelmed her senses. Carmen's limbs twitched, before settling down on the stained sheet. Racter continued to push himself into her, while playing with her sensitive skin, to help her ride out her orgasm.

As she settled down on the bed, breathless and weary, Racter reached down to her entrance to dig his fingers inside, and pulled them out to taste her. "How... sweet," he commented. "You haven't changed at all, my friend."

Carmen chuckled. "You did it again, Racter..."

He blinked, before he laid beside her with a half smile. "It was just a slip of the tongue, Santos... Don't think too much of it."

"I'll try... but, I won't forget how amazing your wicked tongue is."

Racter turned to stare into her dark brown eyes. He then raised up a hand to wipe the sweat off her forehead. "I shouldn't find it surprising that you wanted to have sex, despite the fact Ryan could be watching this..."

She scoffed as she slowly sat up on the bed. "Not watching, but recording, Racter... Didn't I say he has eyes and ears everywhere? He may be busy downstairs, entertaining the guests, but he always have the rooms equipped with cameras, all connected to... something somewhere in this building. I'm trying my best to find it in the Matrix, but it's impossible. Almost as if... it's never in the same place twice... Weird, isn't it?"

Racter shrugged. "I can't tell you, Santos; I don't have the mind of a decker."

"Right... Well, where ever it is, Ryan keeps these recordings secured, and only he has access to them, to my knowledge." Carmen climbed out of the bed to stretch out her body, and pet Koschei as she walked past him to go to the bathroom. "Either way, it doesn't matter... Ryan doesn't seem interested in the act of sex, unless it involves men, and if he is apart of it. He also prefers to ask first, before anyone wishes to have sex with him."

"So, you're not bothered by this fact... interesting."

"Oh, it's weird, don't get me wrong, but thing is... it has saved me from... dark moments..." Carmen grew silent, then shook her head to dismiss the thought.  "Anyway, I'm going to take a shower... Do you wish to join me?"

"No, not tonight, Santos. Perhaps another time."

"Okay then," she said, then stepped into the bathroom.

 

Racter took a shower not long after Carmen was done. After he slipped into some comfortable pants, Racter looked over her sleeping face, before bringing the blanket up to her shoulders. He couldn't help but think how vulnerable she was now, in this state of bliss

Koschei could slice her across the neck with ease.

Racter huffed, before he picked up a cigarette stick and lighter, and stepped out of her room. He noticed Valerie standing at the end of the hallway, holding Aries close to her chest. He gave her a smile, and a small salute, before lighting up the cigarette.

She stared at him for a hard minute, before going to her room. He chuckled, before taking another drag.


	9. A Tangled Red Thread

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _[This magical cord may stretch or tangle, but never break.]_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm... not great at chapter titles.

"Congratulations, Carmen Santos!" Ryan Drake shouted, as soon as she stepped out of her room. "You finally had sex!"

She rolled her eyes with a groan. "Go away, Ryan... besides, it's not like I was a virgin before," she said, as she went to elevator, with Ryan close behind.

He laughed as he squeezed her cheek and cooed. "But, you won me the bet! And, now, I don't have to worry about you anymore, darling."

"What the hell do you mean by that?" she asked as she slapped his hand away from her face, before pressing the "B" button on the panel.

"You had sex with the man who wants to kill you! Don't tell me that won't benefit you in any way?!"

Carmen scoffed. "It's not... why, do you think having sex with Racter will magically fix things between us? It wasn't going to, and never will. You don't know him like I do."

Ryan grinned as he adjusted his sunglasses. "Perhaps I don't... but, you will be surprised what sex can do, darling... Unless... there is something about him that you haven't told me about."

She frowned. "The thing is, Ryan, Racter is a determined man. He will kill me, regardless of whatever deal you made... especially since, I made a promise with him." As soon as she stepped out into the basement, Carmen gave him a wink. "But, I did enjoy myself, and maybe, depending how things go, everyone should expect loud music from my bedroom more often, okay, 'drop-dead gorgeous'?"

Ryan laughed. "What a treat you are, darling... and thank you for letting me know. Perhaps, I can make things work between you two anyway... You never know."

"Thank you, Ryan, but I won't hold my breath. Anyway, you know where to find me, so have a good one."

"Of course, enjoy your time working, Carmen." Ryan gave her a wave, before the elevator doors closed.

 

While in the middle of contemplating, and enjoying a smoke, Racter heard a knock on the door. Once he opened, he gave Valerie a smile, while she narrowed her eyes at him through the bandages. "Are you proud of yourself?" she asked in disgust.

He chuckled as he stepped out of the room, and closed the door with Koschei behind it. A barrier between them, just in case this conversation makes something click in Racter's head. "'Proud' is not the word I'd use, Miss Valerie, but I was left satisfied," he replied, with a superficial smile.

"What do you think you're getting out of this? Sexual gratification, or having Carmen in the palm of your hands, to take her away from us? You're a selfish man, Racter..."

Racter inhaled smoke deep into his lungs, before he let it all out in a plume. "If I may ask, Valerie, do you truly care about Carmen enough, that you don't mind if she doesn't return your feelings, and just want her to be safe and sound? Or will you carry that jealousy until you’re dead?" He chuckled as she was clearly taken aback by his words.

Before she could say anything, he raised up a finger and clicked his tongue. "You and I both know that she is her own woman..." He paused as he just felt a sense of deja vu, before continuing, "So, whatever she does, is her own choice. What she wishes to do, is up to her, and only her. Obviously, I don't need to say such things like this, if you knew her well."

Valerie's body tensed up as she stepped back from him. "You... don't deserve her... You're... using... her... Don't you dare think that... you will get away with this... She should... know..."

"Ah, but what makes you think that she doesn't?"

Valerie became silent, before she turned on her heel. "You both... have history..."

"Exactly. But, as long as we're working for Ryan, I can't kill Santos. I can spend time with her, but that doesn't change anything between us. We can have sex as much as we want, but that doesn't mean anything to me. While I'm sure she still carries feelings for me, I'm sure she knows me well enough that nothing can change my mind... especially since we made a promise."

"A… promise...?"

"Ah, yes... We made a promise that I would kill her, once we are done playing our roles here. Until then, we will remain as 'friends'. Nothing more, nothing less."

Valerie said nothing as she returned to her room.

Racter took another drag of his cigarette, before he stepped back into the room, noticing the long scratch marks on the other side of the door. He ran his fingers over Koschei with a small smile. "She is quite bothersome, isn't she?" he asked.

 

Carmen was surprised to see Racter in the basement, while in the middle of eating lunch. She greeted him with her mouth filled with rice, then drank a cup of water to swallow it. "How are you doing, Racter?" she asked with a wide smile.

"I'm doing well, Santos," he replied, before sitting across from her at the same table. "Got into a rather... interesting conversation with Valerie earlier."

Carmen raised a brow. "What did you talk to her about?" she asked, before taking another spoonful of rice.

"About our relationship. She is... quite unhappy about us having sex. I believe it made her uncomfortable."

Carmen frowned slightly. "I thought I played the music loud enough to drown out my screams... Guess not..."

Racter chuckled. "It's not that, Santos. I believe she carries feelings for you."

Carmen choked on her rice, until Racter sprung out of the table, to save her with a Heimlich maneuver. She wiped her saliva off her chin, before looking up at him with widen eyes. "She... does...?"

As soon as he let her go, Carmen started to clean up her mess, and dump the rest of the food into a trashcan. While she wiped down the table with a paper towel, she looked up at Racter. "I... have been so... selfish... and ignorant..." she said.

"You can't blame yourself for not noticing it, Santos. It's obvious that you are too focused on the past, to realize the things that are happening now. It's not healthy, but it happens. Now, knowing this, what are you going to do?"

Carmen sat back down and thought it over. "I... don't know. Valerie is... a very good friend but... you... I... I still carry feelings for you... and... Val..." Racter noticed that she was starting to tremble in her seat. He sighed as he placed his hands down on her shoulders, and squeezed them to help her calm down.

"Take a deep breath, Santos..." She sucked in air through her nose. "And breathe out..." Then let it out slowly between her clenched teeth. Carmen turned to look at his hands, just noticing that he wasn't wearing gloves. As she placed her own hand over his, she looked up at him.

"How long have you not been wearing gloves, Racter?"

He shrugged as he lifted his hands away from her. "For quite a while. It's rather unfortunate, but I can live without it."

"Well... you should get a new pair, and build a new bracer. I can help you with that, if you'd like me to."

"You're trying to forget what I've told you," Racter pointed out.

Carmen grew silent, as she entwined her fingers together. "I-I know... But, what can I do...? I suck at this... I'm... not meant to be in love..."

He gave her a half smile. "Not meant to be, or are you nervous about the idea of being with someone that can properly love you? You fell in love with me, because you knew what to expect. When you know someone is in love with you, it seems that you don't know what to do, because you are unsure and afraid."

Carmen huffed before she turned to Racter with a frown. "Are you really analyzing me, Racter?"

"I'm just telling you what I think. We had these sorts of discussions before, didn't we? So why do you seem so unhappy about it?"

Carmen stared at him, before she let out a brief laugh. "Well, not entirely unhappy... I do miss our conversations..." She then gave him a firm nod. "Right, okay, so, let's say you're right - that I am afraid. Valerie is a good person, but I was too focused on the past, that I've never noticed it before. But, now that you're here, what can I do about it? If I try to talk to her about it, it wouldn't feel natural. In fact, it would feel... strange. At least, that's what I'm afraid of."

"Of having a potentially awkward conversation over feelings?"

Carmen sighed. "Yep. I don't want to hurt Valerie, but... I know it can't be helped when you're in love, and know that the other person doesn't feel the same way... It's the same between us, because you don't feel the emotional sense of love, but thought of what love could potentially be, and humored me with it. Everything between us was purely cerebral then. I knew that. We had sex, because you were the only one I could go to satisfy that craving." She took in another deep breath. "And, despite the fact that you want to kill me now, we still did, because it's just that. Mindless sex."

Racter smiled at her, while running his fingers over Koschei. "So, you're afraid of actual commitment... I suppose that's understandable. Not every runner can keep a romantic life, in between the moments of bloodshed..." He shrugged.

She chuckled. "I've heard of successful relationships before, but I don't think I can ever have one myself... and besides... even if I do found myself in one... well..." Carmen lowered her head as she idly ran her her hand over her abdomen. "I... don't think it would last..."

Racter looked down at Koschei, staring at his disfigured reflection on the drone's metal body. "Do you think that having a uterus matters, Santos? You never seem to care much about it before, so why do you think of this now?"

"It's not that I have, Racter, in fact, it tends to jump in my mind when I least expect it. But, it doesn't matter anyway. I don't think I can handle the idea of taking care of a child, while putting myself at risk."

"Then, what about a drone?"

Carmen blinked, before she turned to Racter. "What?"

He gave her a smile. "You can't give birth, but perhaps, you can put your time and energy into creating a drone, and cherish it, just like how you act around Koschei. After all, don't you still have Buddy?"

Carmen grinned as she stood up from the table. "You knew?"

"I do, after a pleasant conversation with Ryan, about using Moira's equipment. It's what got you excited for the jobs, wasn't it?"

"Well... you're right, Racter... I think... repairing Buddy can make me happy again, but... I don't know. What do you think?"

He grinned. "I think it's a fine idea, Santos... Perhaps, I could help you with rebuilding him, if you wish."

That brought a wide smile to Carmen's face. "That would be fun! There is still a lot I have to learn from you, Dr. Racter."

Racter laughed briefly, while Koschei clicked his limbs on the ground gently. "Good, Santos. Very good. Now then, can you show Buddy to me? Perhaps we could do some quick repairs on our own, before using the equipments."

"Sure!" Carmen laughed. "I will be glad to!"

 

Valerie was silent as she overheard their conversation, and felt her heart cringe from the sound of Carmen's laughter. She then quietly stepped into the elevator to go to her floor. She felt her bandage soak up a tear on her cheek, before she tried to breath in through her nose.

The moment she arrived to the dance floor, and saw Ryan standing across the room, with a cup of blood in his hand, she rushed towards him. He quickly caught her wrist, before she could swipe her clawed fingers nails across his face. "Upset, Val? I'm not surprised," he said.

"You bastard!" she snapped at him. Valerie then tried to kick him, but he quickly vanished, before reappearing behind her in a cloud of black mist.

"For what? Getting those two together? Letting them stay in the same room, until they had sex? Don't you understand there was unresolved sexual tension in the air, at least on Carmen's part? She favors types like him, more than anyone else, Val."

"So, what?! It doesn't give you the right to manipulate them! That man is not normal!"

Ryan clicked his tongue in disappointment. "I thought you had an open mind, Val, but it seems that your love for Carmen has blinded you. You should know that even she is 'not normal'. We all are 'not normal'. I'm a vampire, for pete's sake, girl! And you're a cat lady."

She hissed at him, which made him laugh.

"See? A cat lady!" He took a sip of blood. "But, there is nothing that can done about this now... Whatever happens, happens. I am hoping that we get to have two reliable runners on our side, but I believe from what Carmen has told me, it would be very difficult to keep her alive."

"So, you don't care what he does to her? What he is doing to her now?"

"What? Have sex, and spend time in the basement, where they both seem to love to be in, and have a chit-chat? Have you not seen how they are when they are together? While she is madly in love with him, he seems to enjoy her company to some extent, at least. Perhaps he is coming up with ways to kill her, but he hasn't attempted it, yet."

"But, are you aware of their promise? That once they are done with their jobs here, she will die?"

Ryan paused to take another drink, then nodded his head. "Yes, I am. Carmen claims that I don't know Dr. Racter as well as she does, and while she may be right, I think I can convince him to change his mind about her. After all, people are rather flexible, I think."

Valerie growled through clenched teeth. "You are a terrible man, Ryan! Why are you doing this?! For your own amusement?!"

Ryan sighed. "Not entirely, Val... As I've said, I want them both alive, and on my side, because they are quite capable... I can see that myself, thanks to the time they spent working together in the basement. So, letting them be together is not simply out of my own amusement, but for their sake. Well... At least, Carmen's. She needs someone she trusts to watch her back."

"Then why not Brimstone or I?!"

"Because you are too in love with her, that you will never allow her to use her skills out of fear, and Brimstone loves causing harm, instead of protecting her. It seems that the only person that knows her better than us, and knows what they are doing, is Dr. Racter."

Valerie glared at Ryan. "You don't know that... you don't know anything!"

He laughed. "Maybe you're right. Perhaps, I don't know anything, and I only think that this is the case. So, I shall send you three off for a run, okay? Then, you can tell me what you think afterward. Give me your full report."

"I shall! And I will prove to you how wrong you are!"

"Then, it's a deal. Now, go and rest your mind, Valerie... you are going to need it."

Once she turned on her heel, Valerie stomped towards the elevator, leaving Ryan alone, to enjoy his drink. A smile played on his lips, before he sighed in satisfaction.


	10. A Questionable Relationship

Destroying property was always fun for Carmen, especially when it belongs to some unfaithful, manipulative bastard. Racter and Valerie watched, as she broke things apart with a bat, and flinging them across the room, watching the pieces scatter across the floor. A maniacal cackle escaped from her, before she started to cough.

"Such admirable enthusiasm, Llorona," Racter spoke up, "but, do keep in mind that we are here to steal."

"Yeah, yeah, I know. Let me just..." She picked up a vase, before slamming it down on a glass table, making Valerie jump in fright. "There we go… The more damage we cause, the more nuyen we get in return," she said, before walking into another room, filled with books, paintings, and a computer. She took a seat before the computer with a smile, and begin to type away on the keyboard. "Let me do some quick hacking, while you two keep watch, okay?"

"Okay... take your time, Llorona..." Valerie said, before she turned to the books, reading off the spines.

While Carmen was busy, Racter sat down on the desk, stretching the new pair of gloves out in his hands. It felt pleasant to be gifted something, but he wondered if Carmen was doing it out the goodness of her heart, or was she manipulating him? He may have to ask her later when they are alone.

He exchanged glances with Valerie, before she turned back to the book in her hand, until she was rudely interrupted by the sound of shattering glass in the other room. They turned to Carmen, as she sat frozen in the chair. She then snapped her fingers at them to be ready, while she continued to search through the computer.

Racter grinned as he got up from the desk, and signaled Valerie to follow him and Koschei out the room. As much as she didn't want to, she followed.

"Oh, well, well, well..." spoke up Lionheart, as he watched the two step out. "Greetings Racter and... not 'Carmen Santos'. Surprised to be seeing you two here."

Racter chuckled as he shut the door behind them. He noticed that the men behind him were wearing uniforms, and carried themselves like mercenaries. Bold, stoic, and ready to attack at anytime. "How unexpected to see you as well, Lionheart. Something tells me that you're here on a mission... Who hired you?"

Lionheart's crew readied their weapons, but he quickly raised a hand up to signal them to stay back. "You're just making assumptions, Racter... ones that are very inaccurate."

"Oh, so, you and your ‘friends’ just happened to be in the neighborhood, and decided to pay a visit to this apartment in particular, where we are in. My... companions, and I."

Valerie gave Racter a look, before she turned back to Lionheart. "We have to take them out, Racter."

Racter grinned as Koschei crawled out from behind him. "I agree, Valerie..." he said.

Lionheart snorts as he shook his head. "Fine by me..." He then whistled to his crew, to pull the trigger.

With a raise of her hand, Valerie set the carpet below them on fire, forcing Lionheart to jump out of the way, while the others screamed in agony, as they shot the ceiling. Valerie turned to Lionheart, ready to launch another attack, but Koschei leapt onto the troll with a loud roar.

Lionheart kicked the drone back, before he heard the sound a of gunshot ring past his ear. Racter cursed under his breath as he shot again, to hit the broken vase behind the troll.

"Really?" Valerie said in disbelief.

"Always a terrible shot he is." Lionheart laughed.

The door then burst open with a hard kick by Carmen, followed by a swing of her arm, to lash out at the troll with her lazer whip. He narrowly avoided it, giving Koschei a chance to pierce a blade into his foot, forcing Lionheart to collapse near the fire. He screamed as he tried to roll away, but Koschei quickly climbed on top of him, to pin him down by the arms.

The smoke from the fire set the sprinklers off from the ceiling, extinguishing the fire, while the others became drenched. Carmen retracted the wire, before stuffing her hands in her pockets. "How in the hell did this guy find us?" she asked.

"We... don't know..." Valerie replied. "Should we... torture him to find out?"

Racter frowned as he holstered his pistol. "I would normally agree to the plan, however..."

Two men and a woman arrived to the scene, with their weapons in hand. "Racter!" the woman shouted, catching all their attention. "You traitor!"

Carmen burst into laughter, getting some questionable looks from everyone, except Racter, as he stood behind her silently with a half smile. Once she calmed down, Carmen gave Racter a gentle jab on the arm. "You really leave quite a lot of broken hearts, Racter."

Racter sighed with a shake of his head. "It's not like that, Llorona, I assure you."

"Sure, sure... But, you know, this really proves-" "Hey!" the woman shouted, as she rose up her grenade launcher. "Shut the hell up, if you want to get out alive! We just need the old man!"

Carmen turned to the woman with a raised brow. "Sorry, but I'm not going to allow that. Well... at least, I wouldn't but, what do you want to do, 'old man'?" she asked Racter.

While his brows furrowed, Racter gave her a grin. "I made a deal, and I will stand by it. The only way this will end, is with someone dying... but it isn't going to be my companions or I..." He slowly raised his finger towards Koschei, as he kept Lionheart down.

"Lionheart!" she screamed in panic.

The troll struggled to fight back against the drone, but once Koschei pulled out his saw, he stopped. There was no sense of hesitation as Koschei drew it closer to Lionheart's face.

"Stop it, Racter!" the woman's voice cracked.

"We all know that won't happen, Peony," Racter said.

Valerie stared at him in fear, before looking at Carmen as she seemed relaxed, despite what was going on. "Llorona..." she whispered to her. "Aren't you... going to do anything?"

Carmen stared at her for a moment, then realized something. "Oh, wait, Racter, why don't we make a deal?"

Valerie and Racter blinked as they looked down at her, while Koschei suddenly stopped. "I think it would be better to just get it over with, and kill him, Llorona," Racter replied, "but very well. What sort of deal?"

"Lionheart's life,” she said as she inclined her head towards the woman, “in exchange for some information. You seem to love the guy, so it would be a such a shame to lose him, and hey, since you haven't killed us yet, it means you don't want this to end up in unnecessary bloodshed, so! What do you think? Are you willing to tell us what we need to know, and get your friend back, or let us be ignorant, and kill your friend?"

Peony and Valerie stared at her in disbelief.

Valerie was used to seeing the very peaceful side to Carmen, but being in Racter's presence changed that. She couldn't tell if this is Carmen's true colors, or if this is Racter's influence. It sent chills down her body, and an unsettling feeling in her gut.

Peony looked at Lionheart, as he continued to try to fight back against the drone, before she sighed, and signaled the men to lower their weapons. "Fine. What do you want to know?"

Carmen clapped her hands together. "Who sent you?"

"We... don't know who exactly... some person under the alias 'Capricious'."

Carmen exchanged looks with Racter. "Oh...? I see. Do you know anything about this 'Capricious'?"

"Nothing at all, I swear."

Carmen stared at Peony for a moment, before nodding. "So, how did they get in contact with you?"

"Through an anonymous message... We've heard about a 'Capricious', but, there was nothing that could we could find that would prove us they are the same person... After all, 'Capricious' has become a well known name some years back..."

Carmen frowned as she tapped her mask. "Right... Well, thank you for the answers... Racter."

With a whistle, the drone climbed off from Lionheart, letting the crew scramble towards him to get him back on his feet. "Screw you, Racter... and you too... Carmen..." Lionheart breathed.

Carmen sighed. "Name is Llorona, not Carmen."

He scoffed. "No point in hiding behind a fake name, if we know who you are..."

"Maybe, but you don't know me personally. They do." She pointed her thumb over her shoulder towards Racter and Valerie. "Now, then, I think we're done here. Let's go guys."

Carmen left the room, with the two following them.

"You wish to hunt for this 'Capricious', don't you, Llorona?" Racter asked.

"Oh, I do... I really... really do..." she growled.

 

The crew found Ryan relaxing on the sofa on the dance floor, with a glass cup of blood in his hand. Carmen took out a case, to show him the bright, brilliant jewelry with a blue sapphire stone in the center. He was in awe as he took the case, and set it aside. "Well done..." he said, then looked them over. "But I get this awful feeling that you found some trouble during your run."

Carmen sighed as she took off her mask. "Met with Racter's old crew during the run. Seems they were hired by someone going by the name 'Capricious'..."

Ryan's brow raised. "Oh? Interesting... Do you have any information about this... 'Capricious'?"

Carmen shrugged. "Nothing much, but I'm going to my room to do some digging in the Shadowlands to see what I can find. See you." She gave him a wave, before walking away.

Racter gave Ryan a brief nod as he followed Carmen into the elevators.

Valerie stood before Ryan with a hard glare. "Something... is not right..." she said.

He scoffed. "Of course that is what you would say after a run with them... What is not right, Valerie?"

"Carmen... was not like her usual self today... Being with Racter... changes something within her..."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes... He... isn't a good person..."

Ryan sighed as he crossed one leg over the other, and took a sip of the blood. "No one is actually 'good' as a shadowrunner, Valerie... You got kind, but not good... People can be terrible... Harsh really... but, they aren't always bad either. You should know that."

"But... this... was different."

"How so?"

"I... I don't know..." Valerie paused, then shook her head. "I want... to continue... to work with them... please."

"Hey, go ahead, I'm not stopping you from doing what you want to do. Hell, the more you work with them, the better you will get to know them. Especially, Carmen. Just, try to open your mind and see who Carmen really is for once, instead of the kind girl you see her as." Ryan took another sip. "I wonder if this what they mean by 'love is blind'..."

Valerie stared at him in silence, before she turned towards the elevators.

 

After she changed into a tank top with shorts, Carmen sat near her computer, idly tapping away at the keyboard.

"Are you afraid of what you might find, Santos?" Racter asked, as he ran his hand over Koschei.

"Yes..." she answered, not bothering to turn away from her monitor. "This person... whoever they are... took my name... I'm afraid that... what I find won't be pleasant... even... even if they did some good."

"Why?"

"I... I don't know... What if... What if they are better than I could ever be? Or what if they are the worse person that ever existed? I won't be able to use 'Capricious' knowing that, I could never be as good as they are... or be stained with infamy and hated... I... I'm afraid... Damn it...! Who am I anymore?!" She slammed her hand against the desk, causing Koschei to whir in alert.

Racter looked down at him with a smile. "I suppose I can understand how it feels, to lose your identity, because you're no longer 'Capricious the Yama King killer'."

Carmen pursed her lips.

"'Capricious the woman who fought a god, and won.'"

She buried her head into her hands.

Racter lifted his hands up from Koschei, to take Carmen's, and grabbed her chin to force her to look into his eyes. "'Capricious', 'Capricious', 'Capricious', the woman who was well liked in Heoi, and loved by her crew... but lost it all... Lost it all, because you wanted your old life back, only to realize, that you did not."

Carmen struggled to fight back her tears, while Racter cupped her cheeks. He wanted to say something to her, but scolding her for her actions wouldn’t help either of them. Instead, he decided to do what he didn’t think he would do ever again, and pulled her close to his chest.

His familiar warmth melted whatever wall she tried to keep up, and made her cry heavily as she wrapped her arms around his waist. There were no words to bring her comfort, but he knew actions were better than nothing, so he gently pulled her off the chair, to guide her to her bed so she could lay down. Carmen held the pillow close as he sat down beside her.

He let out a snort as he shook his head. "'Llorona' really suits you better than 'Capricious'..." Racter then took off his gloves as he laid down, and placed them on the nightstand. He started to run his hand through Carmen's hair, before tucking strands behind her ear. She looked at him with puffed up, red eyes, and clenched teeth.

He gave her a smile in return. "If you keep clinging onto the past, feeling guilty for your actions, then you wouldn't be able to move towards the bright future that I see. That I'm shaping with my own hands."

"B-but..." she hiccuped, "I don't deserve it... I... I broke everything apart... I left you all behind!"

"You are starting to sound like a broken record, Santos, and I'm growing bored of it," he sneered. "I'm not going to waste my time, listening to you going on about how much you hate yourself, for making a 'mistake', so either you break out of that monotony, and grow, Santos, or stay stuck in that rut that you've found yourself in." Racter inhaled deeply, while Koschei began to rip Carmen’s pile of clothes apart, grabbing her attention immediately.

“Hey, wait a min- Koschei, stop!” she shouted at the drone as she sat up. “Racter, make him stop!”

He gave her a look, before he whistled to Koschei. The drone slowly came to a stop, and walked towards Racter, with pieces of Carmen’s clothes stuck to his limbs. Racter pulled a fabric off to wave it between him and her. “In all honesty, Koschei did you a favor, by tearing up your old clothes.”

Carmen huffed as she took the fabric, and ran it between her fingers. She frowned at the sight of it, before she let it fall down to the floor. She groaned as she plopped back into the bed. “You are a terrible roommate, Racter.” She then chuckled as she shut her eyes. “But, then again, things could be worse... I don't know... I suppose I'm happy to have you here with me again... despite... everything... Well, at least we are... 'friends' to some extent.” She forced out a chuckle.

Racter smirked as he ran his hand through her hair again. “Actually, that reminds me of something I’ve been meaning to ask you, Santos.”

“What?”

“When you bought me those gloves, were you doing it out of the kindness of your heart, or are you trying to manipulate me to have me on your side?”

She gave him a look of confusion, before she buried her face deep into the pillow. “I bought them for you because I simply wanted to… and to help you build a new bracer too… Didn’t I tell you this before?”

Racter paused, once he remembered that she did in fact say that, back in the basement the other day. “Ah… right. I thought you were lying.”

A laugh escaped from her, muffled by the pillow. “Of course you did… Anyway, we could get you a new coat too, if you want to. I don’t mind your old one, but I’m worried that it’s not going to last much longer.”

He chuckled as he curled a strand of her hair around his finger. “You just want to go shopping for new clothes, after what Koschei has done.”

“Pretty much,” she said, trying to stifle a yawn. “Ah, I’m so sleepy... Good night, Racter.”

Racter continued to play with her hair as she drifted off to sleep. “Good night, Santos,” he muttered.

 

Ryan stared at the monitor screen with a slight frown. He zoomed in closer to Racter’s face, taking notice of how cold his eyes were, betraying his charming smile.

Racter then shifted his eyes towards the camera, striking fear into the vampire’s heart. A brief laugh escaped from him, once Racter looked away. Now he understood what Valerie may had meant when she claimed something was off about them.

However, Ryan believe there is still a chance to help Carmen regain Racter’s trust again, but that may be a little bit harder than he originally thought, now that he learned something interesting, about the silver haired man.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uggggh, I lost the later chapters, along with the original file for this, but I'm glad I saved it somewhere else when I was about to edit it...
> 
> For now, I'm going to try to bring my focus back on the future chapters, while writing other stuff in between. It's makes me slightly sour about it, but nothing I can do. *shrug*
> 
> Sorry for the mistakes...


	11. Bad Blood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _"But those are the days that bind us together, forever_  
>  _And those little things define us forever, forever"_  
>  "Bad Blood" by Bastille

"'Oi, Ryan," Brimstone spoke up, as he and Valerie approached the bar. "Are you going to make another bet, or do you actually need us for something?"

Ryan raised up a finger, so he could take a sip of blood from the wine cup. "I need you both to do me a favor, and keep an eye out on Carmen and Racter for me, during runs."

"So you finally believe me, for once," Valerie said.

Ryan frowned slightly as he swirled the cup in his hand. "I have noticed something about him, that had answered quite a few questions since I've first met him." He took another sip, before placing the cup down on the counter. "And I won't lie - I don't feel happy that I haven't noticed it sooner, since Carmen loves to talk about her old group quite a bit..."

Brimstone huffed as he rolled his broad shoulders. "After a while, it all becomes white noise," he said. "So, what's this thing that you have noticed about the... old man? Is he even an old man?"

Valerie shrugged.

Ryan chuckled as he leaned against the counter. "The hair makes him seem old, but I believe that he is still around his early forties at least... but, that doesn't matter."

"I think it does, because that leaves quite a large age gap between Carmen and him," Valerie pointed out.

"That still hasn't stopped our little friend from having sex with him, did it, Val?" Ryan asked her with a raised brow. She scowled at him, but said nothing. "Right, anyway, to answer your question, Brimstone, I've noticed certain qualities about him, that could be linked to certain anti-social behaviors. But, I don't think that he will actually ever tell us anything about it, and may try to avoid it, so, with that in mind, I need you two to just keep Carmen safe, while I try to bring them closer together. I don't know if it will ever happen, but I really need them to trust each other... even though, it's more like I need him to trust her again."

Brimstone exchanged looks with Valerie, before they turned back to Ryan. "I don't think that's possible, Ryan," Valerie said.

"Why?" Ryan asked.

"I... am not sure." She idly scratched the back of her neck. "I think that... Cat knows something about them, but you know how she loves to keep secrets... Besides, Carmen knows Racter better than us combined, so it shouldn't be a surprise to us to know that it's impossible to bring them together."

Ryan scowled as he rubbed his forehead. "Well, I don't like the idea of them keeping secrets... if anything strange is indeed going on between them, I will need to speak with them about it."

"Aside from their little promise?" Brimstone asked.

"Yes."

Brimstone chuckled. "Well, if it means I still get paid, I don't mind working with them. The more, the merrier, as they tend to say."

"I'm only doing it for Carmen," Valerie spoke up. "I want to keep her safe."

Ryan snapped his fingers at her. "Don't smother her, Val, but thank you both, for doing this favor for me. If anything happens, do let me know. Otherwise, just mind your own business, okay? Keep things cool."

"No promises," Brimstone replied with a crooked grin.

 

"You know, considering how much damage we usually do during a run, I'm surprised the police never catches us," Carmen said, as she laid on the medical bed. "I mean, back in Hong Kong, we were kind of under the radar, thanks to Kindly Cheng, but now, things are different, you know? Do you think the police will eventually find us?"

"Hiding out in a strip club?" Racter asked as soon as he finished doing repairs on Koschei. "I doubt it, unless they are off the job."

"I don't doubt that Ryan tends to pay them to look the other way, thinking about it." Carmen shrugged. "But, the only person I would really worry about is Duncan. While he usually minds his own business, I sometimes bump into him during runs... It usually leave me feeling a bit... eh."

Racter watched Koschei climbed off the table to stretch his limbs out. "That's quite vague, Santos, but honestly, I don't think I would understand how it feels, even if you are a bit more specific."

"Just saying, though..." Carmen sat up on the bed with a smile. "So, shall we do a bit of repairs on Buddy?"

"Let's."

Carmen slid off the bed, to drag a metal container out from one corner of the room. Racter raised a brow at the sight of the container, and as he helped her lift it up, it was surprisingly lighter than he had expected. After putting in the code, she opened up the container to reveal Buddy, separated into pieces, all kept inside a black plastic foam.

"He's... grown," Racter pointed out, as he ran his gloved hand over the drone's body. Since the last time he had seen Buddy, it was the size of Carmen's forearm, now, it was about the size of her torso. He gave a low hum as he rubbed his chin. "Do you still have the blueprints for him?" he asked.

Carmen turned to a nearby monitor to bring it to life, then reached back into the container to take out a flash drive. She inserted it into the monitor, to show the blueprint to Racter. He chuckled from the sight of it, noticing that it was a decent job for an amateur, along with the sketch designs, and images that were also saved inside.

Even though it wasn't as refined compared to a professional, there was clearly a sense of passion within the images. Something that was similar to his drive to improve Koschei. He turned to Carmen with a smile, and a shine in his eyes. "Impressive, my friend."

Carmen chuckled bashfully, as she twiddled her fingers. "Well, I learned from you, Racter. It... may not be up to your... level, but I tried to do everything you had taught me back in Hong Kong, while doing my own thing at the same time. After all, I can't be like you... as much as you can't be like anyone else..."

Racter grinned as he turned back to Buddy. "That is certainly true... Now then, let's repair your old companion, Santos."

Carmen nodded as she turned the monitor to his direction. "I will do my best, Racter."

 

Valerie arrived to the basement to find Carmen speaking to Racter in a different language, while working on the drone on the table. She cleared her throat to catch their attention, and being greeted by Carmen in Cantonese, until she realized it.

She chuckled briefly as she elbowed Racter gently in the waist, before speaking to Valerie in English. "Hello, Valerie. Is everything okay?"

"Y-yes, everything is. You... do know what time it is, don't you?"

Carmen blinked twice, until she pulled out her PDA. "Oh." It was close to midnight, and she didn't even realize it. She tried to get up from her chair, only to realize they have gotten stiff after so long. Racter laughed as he got up with ease, getting a look of disapproval from Carmen.

"Go with Valerie, my friend, and sleep. I shall clean this up for you."

Carmen nodded as she stretched out her body. "Okay. See you later, Racter." She gave him a gentle pat on the arm, before she followed Valerie out the basement.

As soon as they arrived to Carmen's door, Valerie spoke up. "I... want to ask you something, Carmen..."

"About what?"

"About... the man... Racter... Do you..." She paused to take in a deep breath. "Do you really... trust him?"

What Racter had told Carmen about Valerie's feelings for her echoed in her mind. Carmen wasn't sure what to say or do, but she still cared about her, and didn't want to hurt her feelings, but, she won't lie to her either. "Yes, I do trust him... It's strange isn't it? To trust a man that wants to kill me."

Valerie pursed her lips as she tangled her fingers together. "I'm... worried, Carmen. I don't want you to... get hurt..."

Carmen chuckled as she shrugged. "It's a risk I'm willing to take, Val, besides, as long as Ryan is around, I don't think anything will happen to me."

Valerie shook her head with a frown. "I want to... believe you, Carmen... I really, really do... but..."

Carmen wrapped her hands around Valerie's arms to give them a firm squeeze, while she stared straight into her eyes. "I can't promise you anything, Valerie, because I already made a deal with Racter about my life. You can try to get involved to stop us, but it won't change anything between us." She released her from her grasp, letting Valerie step away. "As I've said, I trust Racter."

"You're... in love with him..."

Carmen silently turned towards her door. "I don't think it's love, Valerie... not anymore..."

"No, you carry feelings for him, like I-" Valerie quickly bit her tongue. She noticed Carmen turned her head slightly, to reveal a hidden smile, but a sorrowful look in her eyes. Valerie felt her heart cringe as she quickly retreated to her room.

Carmen huffed as she opened the door and stepped inside. She then laid down on her bed, to stare the ceiling, while she screamed at herself in her head.

 

As soon as he opened the door, Racter noticed that Carmen wrapped herself up in a blanket. He chuckled as he signaled Koschei inside to close the door, then ran his fingers across the dents that the drone made the other day. "We should either replace this door, or fix it," he said, before he made his way to her bed. "But, you don't care about that, do you?"

Carmen groaned as she slid the blanket off. "Love is a God damn curse, and I hate it."

Racter gave her a smile as he laid beside her. "I assume you have spoken to Valerie, then."

"What could I had done, Racter? Lie to her? Tell her I love her, when in fact, I am not?! Tell her I am not obsessed with you?! You... you're always on my mind, Racter, and it drives me crazy. I... I don't even know why."

"Are you saying we should have sex again, Santos?"

Carmen gave him a look, before she shook her head with a grin. "That isn't going to change anything, Racter, in fact, it would make things worse for me... I'm already confused about how I should feel about you."

"And what do you mean by that, Santos?" Racter asked with a raised brow.

Carmen paused. "Even though there is bad blood between us, for what I've done, I still care about you, and trust you, Racter. I want to move on from the past, but it is easier said than done, when you know how much damage has been done..." She started to rub her eyes, to fight back the tears. "What's worse is that, this thing we have going on between us, means nothing anymore, since you don't see me as your friend, just a target, and an asset. Which is fine by me, because, no matter what happens, I will still see you as a friend. I really want to help you rebuild your life, even though it was me that destroyed your life and work in the first place." She sighed as she dropped her hand. "Along with everyone else's."

Racter stared at her silently as she turned away from him.

"Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that, I don't think I'm in love with you... or at least, I don't believe I should be, because of everything I've done. I'd betrayed your trust, so I have no right to do or say anything, except help you rebuild your life." She chuckled. "At least you're a brilliant man, Racter, so you know what you're doing... I'm just holding you back."

Racter was still silent as she pulled the covers over her shoulder.

"I'm... tired..." she muttered. "Good night, Racter... and... thanks, for helping me with Buddy."

“It was my pleasure, Santos… Rest well,” he replied, watching over her as she fell asleep.


	12. Do Me A Favor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _"And do me a favour, and ask if you need some help!_  
>  _She said, do me a favour and stop flattering yourself!"_  
>  Do Me A Favor by Arctic Monkeys

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've run out of chapter titles, so I'm going by song titles instead... Yes.

A fire fight shouldn't had happened here, Carmen thought, while staring at the woman, holding a grenade launcher in her hand, on the other side of a crumbling wall. Her name is Peony, Carmen remembered, as she ran towards her with her clawed hand, and her blood is red, like any other metahuman, she learned, as she slashed across her neck.

Carmen then picked up the grenade launcher, to see there wasn't any ammo left. She then searched through Peony's clothes, to find only one grenade left, which was good enough for her. As she slot the grenade inside, Carmen walked out of the door, leaving a trail of blood behind.

Carmen tried to call out to her crew, but the gunfire drowned out her voice. She then saw the body of an innocent civilian roll down the stairs, from the upper floor of the apartment. Through her mask, she looked into their puffy red eyes, and the streaks of tears down their cheeks. She snarled as she stepped over the body to climb up the stairs. "Lionheart! Come out, you bastard!" she yelled.

Of course, there was no response, but she was determined to find him. She went all the way up to the roof, to see a tall, broad shoulder figure stand at the other end. They were clothed in a black leather coat, and a gas mask with bright red lenses. "You're not Lionheart..." Carmen laughed, then noticed the helicopter that the enemies had arrived in. "Nice touch," she said as she pointed the grenade launcher towards it. "But, that's not something shadowrunners usually own..."

The person said nothing, as they pulled out a large axe.

"Not much of talker, are you...?" she huffed, as she aimed the weapon towards their direction. "Doesn't matter." As soon as the grenade went flying, the person rushed towards her, with their axe low to the ground.

They dodged the grenade, to grab Carmen by her neck, and flung her across the roof. She slammed into the cement hard, and was about to get up, to nearly fall off at the edge of the roof. Before she could even register it in her head, Carmen was picked up again.

She found herself sputtering out in shaky fits of laughter, as she stared at the gas mask. She jumped as soon as the axe landed on the ground, and flinched when her attacker reached to her mask to pull it off her face. The figure nearly let her go, as soon they saw her face, but held onto her tightly, before pushing her back down onto the ground.

They then picked up the axe from the ground, and stood over Carmen. They kept her pinned with one foot on her chest, as they lifted the axe over their head. Carmen started to curse herself for her fate.

She was going to die by someone's hand, which means her promise with Racter would be broken.

How unfortunate.

Even when Carmen shut her eyes, the image of the axe was burned behind her eyelids.

Then she heard the sound of a machine roar, followed by a muffled scream, that grew distant. She opened one eye to see light reflecting on Koschei's blood covered metal body, and no sight of the attacker anywhere.

Carmen struggled to get up on her feet, until she felt someone take her arm, and help her up. "It's a pleasure to see you alive, Llorona," Racter said, with a wry smile on his lips. "Let's get out of here."

"W-wait," she pleaded, as she turned to Koschei. "The masked... person..."

"Got thrown off the edge, thanks to Koschei. Come on, we should go, _now_."

Carmen was silent as she held onto the rigger. She pursed her injured lips, before nodding her head in agreement.

 

On the way down the stairs, Carmen heard her PDA ring. Racter dug his hand into her hoodie, to pick it up.

"Ah, the lovebirds have made it!" Brimstone laughed. "Good to know."

Carmen frowned. "It's good to see that you're alive too... but... Valerie?"

Brimstone looked around the room for a moment, then shrugged. "I think she is upstairs somewhere..."

"That doesn't help... but, fine." She took her phone to end the call, then went down her contacts list to find Valerie's name.

"Is 'Clanky' my number?" Racter asked with a raised brow.

"Hey, it wasn't me that did it," Carmen replied with a smile. "Isobel hacked in my PDA, I swear... and I couldn't change it back since!"

Racter snort. "Right... go on, and call Valerie, 'Cry-Baby'."

She rolled her eyes as she pressed the call button.

Valerie's PDA went off close by as they arrived to the fourth floor. They turned to see Lionheart holding her in a tight grip, with a wicked smile on his face. "Good evening, you two," he said, while she struggled to be released.

Carmen's face darkened as she let go of Racter. "Don't hurt her," she pleaded, as she slowly approached them.

Lionheart smirked, as he held Valerie close. "No, I-"

The sound of a gunshot rang in the air, freezing everyone in place. Valerie ran towards Carmen as soon as Lionheart slumped over on the floor, with a smile on his face. Behind him was an ork, wearing bright red glasses and dressed up in heavy armor.

Duncan stared at Carmen in silence, before he turned to the window, where he could see bright red and blue lights flashing from a distance. He stood there, while Carmen helped Valerie down the steps, with Racter and Koschei close behind.

As soon as they met with Brimstone, he noticed the look in Carmen's eyes. He said nothing as he lead them out one of the back doors of the building.

 

"They knew we were coming!" Carmen yelled at Ryan, while the others tended to their injuries down in the basement. "Who the fuck were they?!"

"I really don't know, Carmen," Ryan replied, as he pushed a bottle of alcohol towards her direction. She stared at it for a moment, before she forced the top open to chug the beverage down. "I know you're tired, scared, and confused, but I swear, I don't know how they got there, or why."

Carmen cried out in anguish as she shattered the bottle against the counter. Ryan sighed as he started to pick up the pieces. "Go rest, Carmen. You'll need it."

"No, you owe us, Ryan! We will use Moira's equipment as we see fit, for future runs, starting today! And, we need some other equipment too, if you want us alive!"

Ryan glared into her eyes for a hard minute, before he dropped his head. "Fine, use everything in that basement, but you are going to be held responsible if anything breaks, okay? No running to me, or Moira, complaining about broken machines."

"Fine by me," she said. "And... can you give me another drink?" she asked, as she placed her credstick on the counter. Ryan turned it over his hand, then nodded. "I'll give you the strong stuff, Carmen."

 

"Hello, everyone," Ryan said, as soon as he appeared in the basement, with Carmen in his arms. "Short stack is drunk."

Valerie exchanged looks with Brimstone, before she laid her eyes on Carmen. She realized she was out cold, and waved her hands towards the medical room. "Lay her down, please, I'll take care of her," she said.

"I know you can, Val," Ryan replied with a wink, then brought Carmen to the room, where Racter was fixing Koschei.

The rigger turned to them with a raised brow, until he noticed Carmen. "Is she breathing?" he asked, which Ryan answered with a nod, as he placed her down on the bed.

"She is okay, but very drunk."

"Drunk?" Racter smirked. "Santos was never a drinker before..."

"Well, she caught that habit, since she lived in this club," Ryan said, as he walked away. He then placed his hand down on Valerie's shoulder. "Take care of her, and do bring a bucket, just in case... a large one."

"Will do, Ryan."

With that, the vampire vanished. Valerie sighed as she rolled her sleeves up. "Brimstone, please bring a bucket," she ordered.

The troll nodded, then brought a large yellow bucket used for cleaning into the room. He let it sit beside the bed, while Valerie started to mend some of her visible injuries. "If you men don't mind, I would like you two to leave, so I can mend some of her... other injuries."

"I'm done here anyway," Brimstone said. "I'm going to go to sleep. Night."

Even though Brimstone had left, Valerie knew that Racter wasn't going to leave. "Do you like seeing her like this?" she asked. "I mean, you always wanted to kill her, so..."

Racter scoffed as he turned back to Koschei. "I don't think you care much about what I think, Miss Valerie. Besides, you should focus on Santos, instead of speaking to me. She is in your hands, after all."

Valerie gave him a look, before she unzipped Carmen's hoodie. She continued to take care of her injuries, while Racter repaired Koschei.

 

Valerie felt exhausted by the time she was done mending Carmen's injuries. She ran her hand over her bandaged face, with a small smile.

She then turned to Racter, as he sat across from them, with Koschei standing right beside him. He kept watch the entire time, which unsettled her.

She took in a deep breath, before she asked, "If you're done with your work, why are you still here? Are you waiting for me to leave, so you can take advantage of Carmen while she is vulnerable?"

Racter leaned back into the chair with an impassive gaze. "There are some lines that should never be crossed, Valerie, so I would never dare to do anything to Carmen, without her consent. The sheer thought of it disgusts me."

She scoffed. "That's what you say, but I don't believe you."

Racter shrugged with a crooked grin. "You don't have to, for as long as we work together."

"And I pray that it ends soon... with Carmen alive."

"I can't promise you that, Valerie." Racter stood up, and approached her with Koschei close behind. "Besides, I already told you before - she and I made a deal."

Valerie quickly backed away from him, even though she was leaving Carmen defenseless. Racter chuckled as soon as he felt a hand on his arm. He turned to Carmen as she slowly reached out to him.

"R-Racter...?" she muttered.

Racter turned to her with his hand over hers. "Good evening, Santos."

"You're... okay..." she spoke with a slur in her voice. "I'm... happy." Carmen started to burst into tears as she pulled him closer, unknowingly causing Valerie's heart to cringe as she watched them. "I'm sorry..." Carmen continued. "I... shouldn't had made the deal... back  at Tai Po... I should had stayed... with you and the others... at the Dowager Empress... I shouldn't... I shouldn't had been afraid to lose... the only family member I had left..."

Racter said nothing as he hugged her.

"I-I broke our promise... to see the new life you would bring to this world... Something you... worked so hard for... I even helped you take back... what was stolen from you... I... I loved you so much... and I still do... and it hurts... It hurts so much to know that I betrayed you. I'm sorry... I should never be forgiven... but, God, I want to be forgiven..."

Racter sighed as he pat her back.

"I am... a terrible person... a coward..."

"Calm down, Santos."

"B-but-" "I said, calm down." Racter pushed her back, to cup her cheeks, and stare into her eyes. "You should know how I feel about this already."

Carmen started to hyperventilate, while he brushed her unkempt hair behind her ears. "There is nothing you can do, to make up for what you done, Santos, but, we can move on from this. If you truly want to be forgiven, then you have to stop pitying yourself, and accept what you've done, as I've told you many times before. There is no room for forgiveness here."

"I... I know..."

"Then take a deep breath, my friend, and calm yourself down. You're drunk, injured, and no doubt, weary, after what had happened today. Do me a favor, and rest."

"R-right... I will... I..." Carmen paused to suck in air between her clenched teeth. "I will move on from this... eventually..."

"You better, my friend. Now, lay down." Racter gently laid her back on the medical bed, then turned to the roll of paper towels, to wipe away her tears.

"I... am sorry... but... thank you... Racter." Carmen raised her hand up to trace his stubble covered jaw under her fingers. "You're... a good friend..."

He chuckled as he stepped away from her, and faced Valerie, as she held onto her robe tightly. "Do you wish to keep watch of her, or shall I?" he asked.

Valerie shook her head as she hurried out the room.

 

Racter laid Carmen on her side, with her hair kept away from her face, so she wouldn't choke on her own vomit. He spent the next few hours in the basement, working on Koschei, until he heard the sound of heels clicking against the floor. "How may I help you, Mr. Drake?"

"I’m here to check on our drunk friend... I've seen what happened earlier... It crushed Valerie's heart, you know."

"Of course she would be sad," Racter said, as he ran his gloved hands over Koschei's saw. "Love is such a complicated emotion. A strong chemical in the brain, that leads one to act irrationally at times..."

"Something you don't feel for Carmen."

Racter turned to Ryan with a grin, revealing his strong teeth. "No... No, I do not."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm very sure. I mean, you should know that this is the case, since you must had already known the truth about me."

"That you’re a sociopath?"

Racter inclined his head as he clicked his tongue. "A sociopath is made - a psychopath is born."

Ryan rolled his eyes. "I don't care much about what you call yourself, but since I know the truth, I want to ask you something, if you don't mind."

"Go ahead."

"If you truly don't love Carmen, then do you hate her?"

Racter paused as he glanced at Carmen. "I do."

"Then why does it seem like you still care about her?"

"Because, I am forced to act as if nothing has happened between us, that made me loathe her, thanks to you. If it wasn't for you, she wouldn't be alive now."

Ryan narrowed his eyes at Racter. "So you really do want to kill her."

Racter laughed. "Of course, I do! Carmen has to pay dearly for her betrayal, and she will, with her life."

The corner of Ryan's lips curled in a smile. "That's unfortunate... and here, I thought you and her were becoming good friends, despite everything."

"You would, wouldn't you... You're a manipulator, Mr. Drake. An admirable thing, even though I despise people such as you. Using and abusing people who are weak minded and weak willed, for your own benefit."

"Are they really weak minded and willed, Racter? Brimstone and Valerie? Carmen? Listen, if you really loathe her, you could had killed her long ago, no matter what I had said or done, considering everything I've heard about you, Dr. Racter. You never hesitate to take a life, and you had so many chances to kill Carmen before… so, why didn't you? And don't say it's because of our deal. Our deal has nothing to do with it."

Racter stared at Ryan for a moment, while Koschei rumbled and whirred. His limbs clicked against the ground quietly, but it was enough to stirr Carmen awake.

"Damn it... what happened?" she groaned. "My head... hurts..."

Ryan placed his hand on Carmen's head, to brush her hair. "Now, now, short stuff," he whispered, "you drank a lot, so don't move. We will bring you back to your room shortly."

"Ugh... You're loud, Ryan..."

He laughed, while he looked at Racter from the corner of his eyes. "Then sleep it off, Carmen... Racter will be here to watch over you... alone."

Racter blinked.

"Good night," Ryan gave him a wink, before he vanished.

Racter stood up from the chair, to approach Carmen. He looked over her with pursed lips.

Koschei whirred and clicked, as he wrapped his hand around her throat.

He had often imagine, and even dreamt, about how it would happen when he would see her again. Killing her would bring an end to the annoying image in the back of his mind. The look on her face, before she left them.

The glint in her eyes whenever she looks at him, even now.

It would all vanish.

 

But there would be nothing to replace that, he thought.

Nothing could replace Carmen.

As much as he loathed to admit it, without Carmen, things would be far less interesting. Besides, she has been true to her words so far, so it would be best to keep her alive.

A laugh escaped from Racter, as he turned back to the chair, and dragged it to sit beside her. He will never truly understand why Carmen does the things she does, or feel the way she does about him, but it fascinated him in a way.

 

_“I don’t care if you’re a psychopath, Racter. I consider you a friend.”_

 

The look on her face, despite how much it pained her to know he wouldn’t be able to connect with her emotionally, was one he could never forget at that time. Carmen always brought up the word “friend” between them, and he knew she felt insulted the moment he called her a “soundboard”.

Racter chuckled as he remembered how many times she brought those subjects up, acting as if it doesn’t bother her, when in fact, it did.

Then, there was the time she had told him how she felt about him.

Racter clicked his tongue as he stared at Carmen. Perhaps it was because he was the only man there, that she could go to for her sexual urges, but then again, they often held conversations about various subjects. It often left her thinking about his perspective, and slight understanding about him, though it seems she probably will never truly understand him.

Just like how can’t understand her.

Racter hummed as he noticed Carmen trembling. He looked around the room to find a blanket, and draped it over her body. The medical bed clearly wasn’t as comfortable as their king sized one, and even though she is certainly quite drunk, he need to sleep as well.

Racter picked her up with ease, and took her to the elevator. He signaled Koschei to press the button that led to their floor, while he carried her in both of his arms. As soon as they arrived to her door, Racter struggled to open the door, until he noticed Valerie come out from her room.

He could tell she has been crying, even though she was trying to hide her face.

Without a word, she opened the door to their room. “Get a bucket, if you want to keep things clean in there,” she said, before she returned to her room.

Racter wasn’t sure how to respond to that, but the thought vanished, when he approached the bed. He kept Carmen on her side, and brought a trash can from the corner of the room to the bed.

After he slipped off his shoes and unbuttoned his shirt, Racter pulled back the blanket to lay beside Carmen. While she definitely needed to be watched, he fell asleep within seconds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for any mistakes I may have missed... It's 3 in the morning here when I post this, and right now, my brain decides to go into this direction, even though I didn't really want to in the first place! I struggled hard to steer it in a different direction, but I couldn't help myself... Hence, why, things may go into unexpected places from here on. Boy, oh, boy.


	13. Change of Plans and Deals

The sound of dance music blaring on the ground floor, made it difficult for Carmen to even think, as she tried to recover from her hangover. She buried her face into her hands, while her headache thumped with the beat. Racter laid beside her with a cigarette in hand, lost in thought.

"God..." Carmen groaned, while struggling to sit up. "I hate this..."

Racter scoffed before he took a drag. He watched Carmen reached for the cup that Ryan had given her earlier, to help with her migraine, and take a seat. "Does that sort of thing work?"

"What, hair of the dog?" she shrugged as she took another sip. "It's not the best solution, but it helps... kind of... My headache is just-...!" She stopped mid sentence to get up immediately, and run to the bathroom. Racter continued to smoke, as she stayed there for a solid minute, then turned on the showers.

Once she finished and put on her underwear, she returned to the bed. The chilling breeze from the air conditioner made her shudder, and wrapped herself up with the covers. She then shuffled her way to get closer to Racter.

"What are you doing, Santos?" he asked, while trying to push her away.

"You're warm, Racter," she replied.

He stared down at her for a minute, before he took another drag of the cigarette. "And you're wet."

She giggled. "Phrasing."

Racter paused, then shook his head with a quiet chuckle. "If I may ask, Santos, do you really see this place as a permanent home, or a temporary one?"

Carmen backed away from him to lay on her back, and stare at the ceiling. "That's... a good question..." She shut her eyes to shield them from the lights, even though they were already dimmed down enough because of her headache. "I... don't know. I guess you can say that... this is a place that I'm allowed to live in, like a shelter... but, I've never talked to Ryan about living here for good. He allows me to stay, because I help him, but it's not exactly a proper home. It's a strip club..."

She pursed her lips as she turned on her side. "But... it's not so bad. At least, I don't think it is. I'm not exactly close to Brimstone, but he isn't a bad guy, just really sarcastic and blunt. Valerie is sweet, but I think she knows that it won't work out between us. I don't think that will stop her from helping me, though."

"What about Ryan?" he asked.

She paused. "Ryan..." She snickered. "Ryan may be something of a drama queen, but he knows it, and owns it. I respect him."

"Similar to how you respect your foster father?"

Carmen turned to Racter briefly, then answered, "No, my respect for Raymond is different. He gave Duncan and I a home, and he tried to set us straight, even though we were complete hard heads. When it came to his rules, we would find ways to break them." A memory of Duncan sneaking out to see his boyfriend at the time, but was quickly caught by Raymond as he stood outside the house, made her laugh.

She then sighed as she lowered her arm. "But... I can't lie, I'd never felt like I'd fit in. I tried to, and studied thanks to Raymond, but even though I did learn a lot, it didn't change me. I've begun to believe that life isn't for me at all, so, I became friends with people, and, well... I've screwed myself over..."

Carmen chewed on her lip, and turned her gaze back to Racter. He was long finished with the cigarette, that sat on the ashtray on the table next to his side of the bed. As they locked eyes, she smiled. "I know that you hate me and all, but, can I say that, I'm happy to have met you, Racter? That we had been friends at one point?"

He gave her a puzzled look with a smirk. "I suppose you are allowed to, since you've already said it."

She laughed. "Yeah, I guess I just did... but... I mean it. Things... aren't the same, I know, and I am not looking for forgiveness... I just... want to say that..."

"But something tells me you are, Santos," Racter replied, making her shrink back a little. "You are trying to convince me that you don't want to be forgiven, but in truth, it's more of the opposite. You want to be forgiven, and that's what you are hoping for, so you can erase your past mistakes, but we both know that is impossible."

The sound of Koschei's engine whirring as his limbs stretched out over her clothes, then pulled them in underneath him roared into her ear. As she was about to turn to face him, Racter grabbed her face to make her stay put, and stare into his freezing glare.

Her heart thumped fast against her chest, while her cheeks turned red. Carmen started to curse at herself as she tried to keep her distant.

Racter smiled as he let her go. "You still have feelings for me, after all," he pointed out.

She backed away with a huff. "S-so?" she asked. "I mean... it can't be helped! I can't control how I feel! Besides, just because we had sex, it didn't mean anything! We've only done it to get it out of the way!"

"I've said nothing about sex, Santos."

Not only was Carmen's heart beating faster, her headache started to get worse. She tried to get up from the bed, only to see that the room was spinning, so she laid her head back down on the pillow.

Feeling defeated, she sighed heavily. "Is it wrong, Racter?" she asked him in an almost whisper.

"You have to be specific, Santos," he said.

She inhaled deeply as she shut her eyes. "Is it wrong to feel this way? I think you had already known that the real reason why I wanted us to 'pretend' that we're friends again, is because I want us to be friends again... That I wanted to be forgiven... But, I know, I don't deserve to be. It's why I tried to end it all, so many times before, but, somehow, someone or something usually stops me from really doing it."

Her voice started to crack as she balled herself up with the cover. "I... really wish you could... just do it, you know? Just... end it all... but... with Ryan watching..."

Racter was quiet as she started to sob.

The sound of the party music from the ground floor filled the silence between them. When she became quiet, Racter checked to see that she had fallen asleep.

This woman, with tears that had stained her cheeks, is the same woman that he saw leave that very night, he thought. He has every reason to not trust her anymore, nor care about her, but he didn't want to kill her.

Not anymore at least.

There was still potential within her, that is buried deep within her emotional state of remorse. If only she could stop pitying herself, then perhaps, things between them could be fixed.

She just needed to be pushed, and Racter is a little curious to see if he could be the one to push her.

After all, it's obvious that Carmen still trusts him. It just depends on him, if he wants to repair this broken bond.

\---

The scent of cigarettes was strong as Carmen slowly woke up. She blinked a few times and yawned, before looking up at Racter. A smile crept on her lips, until she realized she was sleeping on his chest, and quickly rolled off from the bed with a thud.

She silently hissed in pain as she got up from the floor, and slipped into the bathroom to wash herself up for the day.

No matter how hard she tried to wash it away, she could still feel his warm body against hers.

What a silly woman she is, Carmen thought, to be feeling like this again. She almost forgot he loathed her.

Once she slipped into her uniform, Carmen turned to Racter one more time, before she opened the door, to be greeted by Ryan. He pulled her out of the room quickly, to lead her to the elevator. "Your brother is here," he said, making her eyes go wide.

She saw he wasn't lying, when they approached the ground floor, and saw him stand before the bar. "Duncan," she called out to him, catching his attention away from the stripper poles around the club.

"Carmen," he simply replied with a nod. "Glad to see you're still alive."

"Same here... but, why are you here?"

"I am here to get some information, actually, because I had a client recently, that had reported 'suspicious activity' around their workplace. To say the least, they believe a hacker got into their files, and stole some information, to sell to someone else..." He paused as he gave Carmen a sharp stare. "You are catching my drift here, right?"

Carmen exchanged looks with Ryan, before she sank back with her arms across her chest. "Is this a warning, or are you here to arrest us?" she asked.

Duncan shifted his weight from one leg to the other as he rolled his shoulders. "I'm not here to arrest you, Carmen, to be honest, I don't even want to get involved with anything that you find yourself in, so yes, it is a warning. I think you already got enough on your plate as it is, with that Russian, don't you? I just want to clear up anything that may be related to you, and the others here in the club."

Carmen blinked a few times. "Are you saying you want to look the other way, if we happen to be related to the case?" she asked.

"I'm risking my job here, so yeah, I am. What do you say, Mr. Drake?"

The siblings looked towards Ryan, while his lips parted into a wide grin. "I had a recording that your sister here was busy that night, with a certain someone," he said. "All night long."

Even though that wasn't much of a surprise to Carmen, Duncan shuddered at the thought of what Ryan was suggesting. He shook his head in disbelief. "Very well then. Just give me whatever information you have, but please, spare the details about what my sister was 'doing' that night."

"Not, 'what', my dear Mr. Wu, but 'whom'." Ryan burst out into laughter, while Duncan cringe in disgust.

"Please, Mr. Drake, I'd prefer if you'd be professional about this..." he pleaded.

"I am, Mr. Wu, I promise. I always keep an eye on everyone here, for their own safety. After all, this club is not just my home, but shelter for my darlings, such as Carmen. I promised you I will take care of her, did I not? So, don't you worry about us."

Duncan narrowed his eyes at Ryan, then sighed heavily. "Very well. I shall put this in my reports. Carmen..." he said, grabbing her attention, "Good bye."

Carmen gave him a small wave as he walked out of the club.

Ryan then leaned against her as if he was about to faint. "Your brother is so handsome, Carmen... it's a pity that he prefers normal metahumans, instead of infected."

"You would bite his junk off, Ryan," she said bluntly.

"True... but, I am a gentleman."

Carmen scoffed with a shake of her head. "Sure. Anyway, which recording are you talking about, Ryan?"

"Have you forgotten?" he asked, and she replied with a shake of her head. "You had sex with Racter, Carmen."

It took her a moment to remember, and pushed Ryan off to run back into the elevator. "I knew it!" she yelled. "I have to tell Racter!"

Ryan chuckled as he watched the elevator doors closed.

 

"Racter!" Carmen shouted, as soon as she slammed the door open, and dodged Koschei's attempt to leap onto her out of reflex. She crawled towards the bed, to see Racter slowly wake up with a scowl.

"Do you have a good reason to wake me up, Santos?" he growled.

"Yes, Racter, I do, and it's very important news!" she replied excitedly, while catching one of Koschei's limbs with her cybernetic hand. "I promise!"

He stared down at her with a raised brow. "For your sake, I hope you live up to this 'important news'." He then signaled Koschei to get off from Carmen, so she could climb on top of Racter to his surprise.

"Duncan came by, asking for information, and it's about one our runs, I think. Someone must have gone to him for help, but he is willing to cover it up, for me, so Ryan claimed he has proof that we weren't doing a job at that time, thanks to a recording. Do you know what recording that is?"

"I'd appreciate it if you get off from me, Santos," he said as he pushed her off. Carmen laid beside him with her face as red as a tomato.

"Ryan definitely has a recording of the time we had sex, Racter! I knew it! I knew that he would have one!"

"Didn't you say something like this before?" Racter asked.

"Yes, yes, I definitely did, because this is Ryan. He would totally have a recording of the time we had sex."

"So...?"

"So?"

"So what does this have to do with anything, aside from 'proof'? Do you find it disturbing that your boss has such recordings?"

Carmen paused as she thought it over. "I... No, actually," she answered as she sat up. "I mean... I don't know..."

Racter smirked. "Don't forget, Santos, I have a recording of you stripping at one point, and that trideo was given to me by Ryan himself. If I recall correctly, you didn't like the idea of me having such a recording, so why does this come as a shock to you?"

Carmen tilted her head to one side with her pursed lips. "I guess... it's because I knew this was bound to happen at some point. Ryan always keeps these recordings, and I never really knew why. I actually consented to the idea, since I first started to work here, since Ryan believes there might be a traitor working here."

"Pardon?" Racter slowly sat up with a quizzical look. "Ryan believes there is a traitor here?"

"It's why I work during the day, Racter, to keep track of maintenance. If anything is out of place, I have to report it to Ryan. The reason why he keeps every room bugged, is to find any possible traitor, that may destroy his business. This place isn't just a strip club, or a home to him, it's his base of operations. Ryan is careful with who he does business with, but sometimes, things may escape him. It's why he keeps only a handful of runners, like you, Valerie, Brimstone, and I. He also keeps watch of the strippers too, just in case, but I think that itself is separated from our type of work. We are shadowrunners, not strippers."

She paused as she realized something. "I... didn't tell you this before, did I?"

"No, Santos, no, you did not."

Carmen sputtered into laughter as she ran her fingers through her hair. "Ah... Yeah, that's a thing. Ryan wants to keep his eye out for possible traitors under his payroll. I think he may have had some history with that, which is why he keeps such a close eye on us all... but... I can't say for sure this is true. I just assume that this may be the case why he does what he does..."

She grew silent as she climbed off the bed. "A-anyway, I got things to do... Sorry for bothering you, Racter. Rest well."

As she reached for the door, Koschei kept clicking his limb over her feet, nearly making her trip over him, until she left. He then returned to Racter's side to run his hand over the drone. Curious, he thought, that Ryan would be keeping watch of everyone in this club. If there truly is a traitor, then who would it be? Maybe Ryan prefers to be safe than sorry.

Racter wouldn't blame him for that. He understood full well how it feels to be betrayed by supposed "friends". Even Carmen was in the same position as well.

Which reminded him that he should speak to her about the change of plans.

\---

In the middle of her break, Racter approached Carmen to speak to her.

"What do you need?" she asked.

"It's important that we speak about our relationship."

Her brows furrowed. "Okay... what's on your mind, Racter?"

"I've had a conversation with Ryan the other day, when you were in a drunken stupor, and I believe that things have changed between us, at least, professionally speaking. Keep in mind, I have not forgiven you for your actions, but that doesn't mean you still aren't useful to me, Santos. I believe you have a lot of potential, and if we work together as we used to, I can rebuild myself right here in the city. You are the key to that future."

Carmen frowned at what he was suggesting. "You want to break off the deal..." she said.

Racter simply smiled at her silently.

She huffed. "Where is the revenge driven man I know and love, Racter? Surely, you can't just change your mind that easily. I know you!"

Koschei's limbs clicked against the ground as he walked closer to Carmen. She stared down at him with thinned lips, but didn't move an inch away from the drone. She waited.

"You are guilt driven, Santos, and you think that your death would truly solve all your problems, but in truth, you want to escape from them," Racter spoke up, while Koschei slowly moved around Carmen, keeping his sensors on her at all times. "That wouldn't bring me the satisfaction that I thought I wanted, when I first came to this city, to search for you. I won't lie; I've changed my mind. Instead, I want you to live with that guilt, Santos. Live, and move on, because you still have potential in this world. Something that I need for the future that I seek."

"So," Carmen spoke up, while staring at Koschei, "to say the least, you need my help."

Racter nodded his head, still smiling.

She chewed on her lip while Koschei still circled around her.

After thinking it over in silence, she raised her eyes to lock them with Racter's impassive gaze. A sigh blew out from her lips, before she gave him a smile. "I don't agree with this sudden change of plans, but fine, I will play along with it, and help you, Racter."

Koschei whirred, then returned to Racter's side, so he could lay his hand over his chassis. "Good," Racter said. "Excellent. Now then, shall I assist you with work, my friend?"

Carmen scoffed with a nod. "If you want to, sure. You will be getting a load off my back, now that things seem mostly all right, between us... for real this time."

"Very well,” he replied.


	14. Dreamer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If there has been any mistakes, please feel free to point it out to me. I tend to overlook them a lot.

The sun's rays beamed through the window, hitting Carmen's eyes. She rose up her arm to shield them from the bright light, until she noticed something shining on her ring finger. A brilliant silver band, with a diamond in the center. Her eyes widen in shock as she quickly sat up.

What's wrong with her, to sleep with her wedding ring on, she thought. Well, there was no point in taking it off now, since she is awake.

"Are you okay, darling?" her husband murmured.

Carmen turned to him with a smile, and gently pulled him to get a better look of his face. She ran her fingers over his chiseled jaw, while staring into his dark eyes. A giggle escaped her when she brushed his blond hair back. "I'm perfectly fine," she purred.

"Good." He pulled her in to kiss her gently, only for her to return it with a passionate one, which made the start to their day rather amazing.

Unfortunately, it couldn't last for much longer, since he had to get ready for work, and their children had to prepare for school.

(Carmen was more than happy to stay at home, but as soon as everyone left, she realized she felt rather empty inside.)

(As if there was something lacking, despite how perfect this (dream) life was.)

While she worked on the family computer, she heard the sound of a machine whirring outside her window. For a brief second, she thought she could see a pair of red eyes staring at her through the curtains, but when she checked, the sound became quiet, and the red eyes vanished.

(Her beating heart sunk in sorrow.)

After making sure the windows were secured, and the alarm was on, Carmen approached the doors to double check their locks, only to see there was dirty mud tracks on the white carpet. She sucked in a deep breath as she followed the tracks slowly, and pulled out a small pistol from underneath a plant.

Carmen froze when she heard a click. She felt something burning in the back of her head, so she raised her hands up, with her finger right on the trigger.

Before it(/he) shot, Carmen immediately dropped to the floor, while twisting her body, and aimed the weapon towards the drone. She couldn't bring herself to shoot it(/him).

Instead, she saw a tall figure appear over her head. He slowly knelt down towards her, to place his hand on the pistol. "Is this what you'd always wanted?" he asked, with a very light Russian accent.

Carmen said nothing as she felt her eyes watered up.

"A 'perfect' life? A husband, children, and a home, where you feel safe?" The man snickered. "Well, I guess 'safe' isn't the right word here, considering you kept this underneath a plant, Santos..."

Carmen started to sob as she wiped her eyes.

(Even in her dreams, he tends to be there.)

"No..." she replied.

"Then, wake up, Santos... Wake up, and make due with what you have."

She could feel his fingers move over her skin, sending shivers throughout her body, until his hands laid over her eyes.

"Wake up, my friend," he whispered, which pulled her senses out of her body, and fall into an endless void.

 

Carmen's eyes fluttered open, to see the all so familiar fan spinning above her bed. She turned to her side, to see Racter sleeping. A soft sigh of relief escaped from her, before she sat up, to go to the bathroom.

\---

Carmen couldn't help but think about the dream, in the middle of showering. Even though it was rather pleasant at first, she couldn't deny how she felt towards the end of it. The excitement of danger, while in the hands of a person she trusts.

If it was reality, however, Racter wouldn't hesitate to kill her on the spot. It's what he tried to do when he first found her here, after all.

She wondered what would have happened, then, if someone happened to stumble upon her body in that world. Who would be the first to find it? A neighbor? Her possible children? Her husband?

Maybe Racter would put himself at risk, and call the police, before disappearing, so her body could be preserved as early as possible in some morgue.

If he left any remains at all, that is.

No, she thought, Racter would definitely let Koschei maim her, until she is an unrecognizable pile of gore. That would be hard to get out of the carpet and furniture.

An interesting crime scene that Duncan might have to "investigate," not that he needed to, since he would totally know who had done it at the beginning.

She laughed at the thought.

"Something funny, my friend?" Racter asked, nearly making her slip in the shower.

Carmen quickly caught herself with the handle in the shower, and pulled the curtains back to see him brush his teeth. "You scared me, Racter..." she huffed.

"My apologies," he returned with a smirk.

She shook her head to dismiss it, and pulled the curtain back.

It was actually rather jarring to see Racter act like he used to, after their discussion the other day. When he had claimed he had mastered how he is supposed to act, he wasn't lying, Carmen thought. She found it to be an amazing talent, even though he had to practice, and perfected it, since childhood.

A psychopath, with a brilliant mind, and frightening goal.

A man that she had fallen for, because of her attraction to danger.

Compared to her seemingly normal "husband," Carmen yearned for Racter more, and she wasn't sure how to feel about that.

Not that it mattered anyway, since her "normal" life is being a criminal, and kill for a living.

"Do you need the shower, Racter?" she asked.

"Once you're done, I'll use it," he replied, while drying off his face with a towel.

"I'm done now, so I'll leave the water running for you." She then pulled the curtain back again, and reached for her towel to dry herself off, as she left the bathroom. As always, Koschei sat on top of her pile of clothes, so it was difficult to find anything that wasn't shredded apart, thanks to him.

Once she found a surprisingly intact set of clothes, she slipped into them. Carmen then knelt down to fix the wiring around her computer, and plug them into separate square boxes. "Hey, Racter?!" she called out.

"Yes?!" he replied from the shower.

"Do you mind if you take over my job for today?! I got something I need to do in the Matrix!"

There was no response for a moment, but she waited until he turned off the water, and walked out of the bathroom not long after. Carmen blushed at the sight of his soaked body, from the sharp talons of his toes, to his silver hair that stuck to his cheek. Even though she had seen him naked many times before, seeing him like this unintentionally made her feel shy.

She forced herself to look back at the boxes that lay beside her computer, which made him smirk from amusement.

"I certainly don't," he finally replied, as he walked by her. She flinched when he gave her head a gentle pat. "But, I would like to be paid twice for covering your shift, my friend."

Carmen cleared her throat, before she said, "I don't know if he will, but feel free to ask him about that. I never really took a day off, and even when I got sick, Ryan still paid me for those days, so I hope he doesn't mind paying you twice the amount, just for today. It's his club, after all, and we are his workers."

"Very well." Racter straightened out his shirt, once he finished buttoning it up, and adjusted his belt over his pants. He signaled Koschei to follow him out of the room. "Be well, my friend."

"Same to you, Racter," she replied, before she climbed back into bed, with a cable in her hand. Once she plugged it in her datajack, her entire mind was immediately ripped away from her body, and spat out into a world of zeros and ones. Carmen turned to see through the camera set up on her desk, to check her body resting comfortably in meatspace.

This might take a long time, she thought, as she turned away, to face a portal. Time to find some information about this "Capricious".

\---

The thing about being a decker, in the wide world of The Matrix, is how they can manipulate, bend, and twist it for their own use. Everyone is connected to it, everyone needs it, but that's what makes it difficult to keep personal information safe, which is easy for deckers, and technomancers, to find and use for their own reasons.

Instead of taking her usual form, that is basically a reflection of herself in the cyber world, this time, she chose the avatar of a penguin, while making up personal information, for those that choose to hack her. She also made invisible points to find her way back home, just in case she gets in too deep. (For some reason, it’s hard to find her way into Club Sanguine’s system, whenever she dives into cyberspace.)

While The Matrix is certainly quite vast as it is, Capricious had a strong belief that it could be bigger, and better, with time. It probably won't be during her lifetime, but one day it may happen.

Funny enough, it made her think about Racter's goal, about bringing a future of metahumans that can change anything about themselves, without worry. Perhaps, it won't just be psychopaths and sociopaths that will make it come true.

But, she will have to keep that thought to herself, until she speaks to Racter in meatspace.

For now, she waddles through the Shadowlands, looking for any information about "Capricious".

 

"Hoi, Penguino," someone called out to her. "You seem like an amateur hacker... Want some help?"

Carmen hummed as she tapped her chin. As much as it bothered her to be called an "amateur hacker," she decided to play along with it. "I don't mind... Actually, I'm just looking for information about someone."

"Oh?" they purred, while teleporting right before her, making her jump back in fright. "Who is this person you are looking for?"

Carmen looked them over, noticing they carry themselves in a very masculine, but flamboyant way, much like Ryan himself. Actually, it was hard to tell if they were really masculine or feminine, given their adrongynous appearance, but it didn't matter. "I'm searching for details about a person named 'Capricious.' They were big news a few years ago, or so I've heard."

The person's image flickered as they gave her a perplexed look. "'Capricious?' I have heard of them - actually, they were, as you've said, big news for quite a while. But! I won't say much more, unless you pay me, Penguino."

"How much?"

They seemed almost taken aback entirely by her sudden acceptance for such an offer. "Ten thousand nuyen," they replied, while trying to recollect themselves.

Carmen lifted up her fin, and with a wave of her hand, she transferred the nuyen directly to the stranger. They looked at her in astonishment, while she seemed rather impassive about the deal. "Well?" she asked.

The person stuttered, before clearing their throat, and took the nuyen. "This is an archive of old data about 'Capricious', along with some relevant information about their sudden reappearance. It seems that cogs hidden in the shadows are starting to turn."

"'What do you mean by that?"

The person sighed as they dropped their shoulders. "There are plenty of strange things happening, and it seems that so many people got themselves involved in those strange things, but some, like me, prefer to avoid it, you know? And the fact that you are another person, asking about this 'Capricious,' tells me that I should keep out of The Matrix for a little while... Maybe relocate somewhere far from here."

Carmen hummed lowly, as she recalled the events in Heoi. "I know what you mean, and I wouldn't hold it against you if you choose to leave. Just give me the details. I may not fully understand what's going on, but that may just be someone else's problem, not mine. I got my own things to deal with."

"Fair enough, Penguino. Here." With a flick of their wrist, a seemingly small file appeared, which she took into her fin.

Carmen checked it over a fear times, before nodding. "Thanks a lot, stranger. Stay safe out there."

"You too," they replied, before they disappeared within the blink of an eye.

On her way back to meatspace, Carmen couldn't shake off the feeling of being watched, but it didn't stop her. Once she returned to her computer, she shut down the portal, and immediately jacked out, where she could breathe in fresh air, through her dry throat.

\---

Since her body felt like pins and needles, thanks to the time that flew by when she was jacked in, Carmen had to stay in the room to stretch out her limbs. When she heard the door open, she turned to see Racter had returned from the basement. "Hey," she greeted him.

"Good evening, my friend," he replied with a small salute. "Did you enjoy your time in The Matrix?"

"It wasn't bad." She slowly bend over to touch her right foot, while keeping her left one in place. "I found some information about 'Capricious', luckily, but I'm still trying to come to terms with it."

"Since they have taken your alias, my friend?"

She hummed as she bent over to the other foot. "Kind of..."

Racter was silent as he watched Carmen do yoga, until she was done, and sat down on the bed. "There is still some digging I need to do," she continued, "with the archive I've been given, but it seems that they were really dealing with some 'odd jobs'. But, there hasn't been any information about who they really were, except that they were an ork. They seemed to be shadowrunners like us, so anything about their personal lives is unknown. No real name, no information. Anything that may have been said about them, can only be taken as a grain of salt, given it is all just a bunch of rumors, but I can't dismiss them entirely. Sometimes, rumors have some truth to them."

"Very well. It's impressive to see that you have done so much in a day, however, my friend," Racter said as he slowly laid down on the bed. Koschei returned to the pile of clothes that no longer belong to Carmen now, even though some of them are still intact.

She sighed as she laid beside him. "Thanks, Racter. So, how was your day?"

Racter paused as he thought about it. "Not so bad, I suppose. Fixed some wiring here and there, and even upgraded Koschei, after asking Ryan for permission to use the medical room for him. It was decided that he would allow me to do that, since he can't simply give me double the amount of nuyen for your job."

"Fair enough, I guess."

"I've also repaired your drone as well, since I had a lot of time on my hands."

"Wait, what?"

"I will show it to you tomorrow morning, my friend. Buddy II has been repaired, and upgraded, to help us in our future runs. I have to admit, you did some impressive work on him, but I felt that he was lacking in something, so I added my own personal touch to the drone. I promise you, Santos, you will like it."

Carmen stared at Racter in disbelief, before she sputtered into laughter. "Of course you did, Racter..." Once she calmed down, she lessened the space between them. "I... would be happy to see Buddy II again tomorrow..."

Racter slowly reached out to cup her face, to allow her to be embraced by his warmth. Even though his gaze was as cold as ever, he couldn't help but think about how genuine Carmen really is.

She truly hasn't changed since then, he thought.

"Thank you, Racter," she whispered, as she nuzzled her face against his chest. "You... are a really patient man."

He chuckled as he ran his fingers through her hair, which made her shudder. "You are welcome, my friend."

Carmen couldn't fight the weariness on her mind and body, even though she had spent her time in The Matrix for almost the entire day. As she shut her eyes, she had realized the real reason why she felt so tired. It was Racter, and his warmth that she had yearned for so long.

She struggled to keep her eyes open, but as he continued to run his fingers through her hair, the more tired she had become. Eventually, she decided not to fight it anymore, and drifted off to sleep on his chest, that slowly rose and fell with every breath.

Racter couldn't deny that he was surprised to see that she had fallen asleep already, but he did not show it.

In fact, it bothered him.

He will never truly understand why she is so attached to him, even though she was the one who left him and the others. No matter what she says, he could not believe her, but her actions make it clear that she still cares about him. The way her eyes twinkle in his presence, how she acts when they are together in the same room, and the fact that she is willing to help him despite what she has done.

She truly does feel guilt, he thought.

Even so, he can't forgive her.


	15. The Scorpion

Carmen looked over Buddy II in awe, as the scorpion shaped drone stood on it's many legs before her. The tail was positioned upright, with a slight curve, where the tip of the end hangs, and the pedipalps had spikes drilled into them. She ran her fingers over the cold metal body, taking in every screw, plate, and wheel that Racter had secured together, to make the shape, then pried the abdomen of the body open, to reveal a large container of unknown liquid within. "What is this?" she asked Racter.

"Simply put, it's poison, so I recommend that you'd be careful with your companion, my friend," he replied, while waving the cigarette stick in the air. "Mr. Drake allowed me to install it, in return that I'll pay it off in our future runs. It's quite a large sum, but it's nothing compared to how lethal your 'Buddy' will be on the field. I've built it using some scraps, and similar material and resources that I had used for Koschei, so 'Buddy' will be able to withstand a few grenades. Honestly, I'm quite proud of my work, but I hope you will improve it. Don't let it all be for nothing."

Carmen giggled as she shut the abdomen close, and secured the lock, then got up from the floor to give him a smile. "Very well, Racter, I promise!" She paused as she picked up the controller from the table. "But... why did you do this anyway, Racter?"

"Despite our relationship?" Racter shrugged with a crooked grin, then took a drag of the cigarette. "It would be a shame to leave such a drone, with so much potential, to be collecting dust in a box, right here in the basement of a strip club, so I had to fix it. Especially since you didn't seem to be in any hurry to finish the process yourself, my friend."

Carmen gave Racter a look, then shook her head with a grin. "You're lucky I like you, Racter. The last time someone messed with a device of my own, he died, but then again, he was a total ass." Once she jacked into the controller, and flipped the switch, Buddy came to life.

Racter stood beside her, to explain to her what each button does, and how the drone operates with the sticks installed on it. Unlike Koschei, Buddy was a lot more rigid, which made it difficult for it to turn around corners, but the tail could stretch out far enough to catch people from corners. The pedipalps opened up to grab onto a metal bar, then shut tightly with a button command to put a slight dent in it, which would be a lot more lethal against flesh.

Carmen smiled as she commanded Buddy to release the metal, and approach her, so she could pet it. "Oh, man," she squealed in utter joy, "I can't wait to use him on a job! Thanks a lot, Racter!" She then hopped back up, to wrap her arms around the rigger with a laugh, nearly dropping the cigarette from his lips.

Racter sighed as he tried to get his arms free, so he could take the cigarette out of his mouth, and ran his hand through her hair. "I certainly hope you put it to good use, Santos. Or else, you'll have to pay me back all the nuyen I've wasted on it."

She laughed as she let him go. "Don't worry, I will."

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things have been rather off for me lately, for multiple personal reasons, but I still want to continue to write, even if it's just with bits of stories. To be honest, this was meant to be longer, but I wanted to just write something with both my protag and Racter again, because they give me inspiration to write. In a sense, they are my muses, and even if it's something short, writing them makes me happy.
> 
> Thank you peeps so much for reading, and I hope to continue to write like I used to!


	16. Surreal

It was barely five in the morning once Carmen woke up, and realized she was sleeping on Racter's chest once again. She felt her cheeks grow hot as she looked up at him, still slumbering. It felt odd.

Not wanting to disturb him, Carmen quietly got up, went to the bathroom to wash herself up, and left the room. The club was like a different world at this time, with no one awake. It was like some surreal dream, but Carmen dismissed it as just a feeling that grew from spending too much time in the Matrix. Since it was very early, she decided to stop by at the ground floor, instead of going to the basement. She was surprised to see Ryan awake, and standing behind the bar.

He beckoned her with a wave, and as she approached the bar, she noticed she wasn't wearing his sunglasses this time. Carmen assumed that maybe since it was just him and his runners, there was no need to put up a thinly veiled disguise this time. "Hello, Carmen," he greeted her.

"Hoi, Ryan," she replied with a smile. "Feeling all right?"

He scoffed as he placed down a cup and filled it with water. "I haven't slept yet, but I'm doing just fine for the time being."

"Long night?" she asked, as she reached for the cup.

"Something like that... Got a lot in my head."

The way he spoke made the strange feeling inside her grow stronger. Ryan without his sunglasses is one thing, but to drop his haughty personality, and act like a completely different person is another. Carmen frowned slightly as she took a sip of the water. "Do you... want to talk about it?"

Ryan stared at her in silence for a moment, then sighed while rolling his head around his shoulders, and straightened his posture. "You could say it's just paranoia, but I have this feeling that something is going to happen, and if we don't act soon, all of this," he lifted up a long clawed finger to wave it around the general area, "would have been for nothing."

"What do you mean, Ryan?"

Ryan bit his lip as he gave Carmen another look, and grinned as he leaned against the counter. "I worked hard to get where I am at now, Carmen, and I am not going to give all of this up without a fight. I don't know what's going to happen, but I need you and the others to work with me on fighting back whoever might bring us misfortune, get it?"

Carmen inclined her head with a raised brow, utterly puzzled. "You don't mean that someone is out to get us, do you?"

"Oh, yes, Carmen, I do. When your brother visited, I couldn't help but think about our recent deals with our clients, and that one run that nearly got you all killed. As your boss, it's my job to keep you all in the best condition, to keep this business up, and right now, I need to plan things out, in case it all hits the fan. I need to act first, and build a back up plan for everything... but, I don't know if I have the time for it."

"So, you need our help."

"Yes."

The two looked at each other in silence, until Carmen pursed her lips, and gave him a nod. "Okay then, you got me, so that's one. I will speak to Racter about this, and see what he thinks. For the others... well... I don't know how to talk to them about this, Ryan. I am... a pretty bad decision maker."

Ryan let out a snort. "Of course, as you've often point out, whenever you cry about what happened with this 'Yellow Lotus'. Anyway, thanks for hearing me out, short-stack. I need to get some rest."

"No problem, Ryan... I might head out for a walk, okay?"

"Very well. Stay safe." With a wave, Ryan vanished in a dark mist, leaving Carmen by herself to finish the rest of her drink.

 

It was getting colder, so Carmen returned to her room to put on a set of clothes, that was kept safe in her drawers. She checked on Racter once again, to see he was still sleeping, and turned to Koschei as he hid himself in the pile of once intact clothes, that has now become shreds of cloth and other sorts of material. She had accepted their fate, the moment she found her torn up panties.

At least they can be replaced, she thought.

Once she stepped out, she saw Brimstone walk past her. "Hey, Brim. Good morning," she greeted him, as she hopped into the elevator.

He looked at her with a crooked grin, revealing his long curled tusks. "Isn't it a bit early for you to be up and about, peanut?" he asks, as they walked into the elevator, and pressed the ground floor button.

Carmen rolled her eyes at the word "peanut," and chuckled. "Yeah... but, I'm feeling sort of... restless, y'know? I just want to go, and get some fresh air... Shake off this... feeling."

"If that's what you want to do, then by all means, go ahead, but do be careful out there. I have my own business to attend to."

"Aside from exercises?" she asks with a half smile, as they walked out of the elevator.

"Yep. I have to go pick up a weapon I ordered a month ago." He gave her a pat on the head, once they reached the door. "See you later."

Carmen gave him a wink, before she went down a different street with a wave.

 

Carmen sat outside a small restaurant, with a plate of food she had ordered. She didn't even realize she finished, until she reached for another slice of the tofu, only to see that there was none left. She stared down at the plate blankly, before setting the fork down, and stared up at the bright blue, cloudless sky.

Why does everything still feel as if she was dreaming?

Is something wrong?

Did she get injected with some sort of BTL chip?

No, that can't be the case. She is awake, but there was nothing she wants to do, or have anywhere to go.

There is no real reason for her to be out here, she thought, until she realized something, and checked her pulse.

Her heart was beating fast against her chest, and she didn't even realize it, until now.

Carmen got up from the table, to find another place to sit down, and rest. She found a nice bench, right underneath a tree decorated with lights. The holidays are just around the corner, she thought, as she sat down. How quickly time flies.

She took in a deep breath, and counted backwards from ten, to slowly breathe out, and calm herself. She struggled to not give in to her anxiety, but it just made her think about it more, which made it worse.

She couldn't even think straight when she pulled out her PDA, and picked a random contact from her list.

"What is it this time, Carmen?" Duncan's voice rumbled into her ear.

"D-Duncan...?" she replied. "I-I'm so-sorry... I just-" "Breathe, Carmen. Where are you?" he interrupted.

"I... don't know..." she said, as she looked around. "I really... don't... know..."

She could hear Duncan sigh heavily, before he cleared his throat, and said, "Okay, Carmen, I need you to listen to me, okay? Close your eyes."

"All right..." she replied as she shut them.

"Take a deep breath."

She did so.

"And exhale."

She breathed out.

"Now, open your eyes, and look at something that catches your eye, and explain it to me."

Carmen turned her head to the tree. "A... tree... with lights. Beautiful, colorful lights..." She got up from the bench, to reach out for a light bulb. "It's... amazing. I think... shamans usually come here to meditate... but... I don't know."

"All right, what else do you see?"

Carmen looked away from the tree, to find several more, just like the one she stood beside. "Even more... beautiful trees. I think... I am in a park."

"Right... so, tell me, did you do anything before you got there?"

"I ate breakfast... Wasn't bad... I think... I don't remember."

"Do you remember the restaurant?"

"Ah, yeah, it's just some fast food place. Kind of had a big as hell logo... but, the people inside... I think they were kind."

"I see... What else do you see?"

Carmen looked up at the clear blue sky, where the tall buildings tried to reach. "Nothing out of the ordinary... just... quiet." She glanced at the area around her, able to see things a little bit more clearly, thanks to Duncan's voice. "I think, I know where I am now...! Here, let me give you the details, okay?"

"Fine."

With a few quick taps, she sent Duncan her location. He then replied, "Stay there, okay? I'll go pick you up, Carmen."

"All right. Thanks, Duncan."

"Yeah... no problem."

 

As soon as Duncan arrived at the park in his car, Carmen immediately rushed over to sit in the passenger's seat. She gave him a wide smile as she said, "Thanks!"

"Don't mention it," he replied, then pushed the pedal gently to get the car moving.

Carmen stared at the window, lost in thought, while Duncan made turns and stops around familiar locations. She glanced at him briefly, noticing that he seemed to be at ease, even though she must be nothing more than a burden to him. Still, she was grateful that Duncan went out of his way to help her.

It was just difficult to accept that things weren't the same anymore.

Once they arrived to the club, Duncan spoke up, "There is something you should know, Carmen."

She gave him a puzzled look. "What's wrong?"

Duncan breathed in through clenched teeth, as he leaned back against the driver's seat. "What I'm going to tell you, is a breach of trust, between my client and I, but if I don't tell you, you wouldn't be ready to face it." He looked directly in her eye, making her body stiff as she tried to keep eye contact. "Catherine Talon is aware of your activities."

Carmen's eyes widen as her jaw dropped. "You... don't mean the same... Catherine... do you?"

"The one, and only, Carmen. It seems that whatever you've done has gotten her in trouble with some people, and she has tried to reach out to me for help. Now, I can't say much more, but take my advice: if you see Catherine, be careful. Something is not right here."

Carmen paused, and slowly turned towards the bright neon lights that hung over Club Sanguine's door. It seems that Ryan was right, she thought. "Okay, then, Duncan... You should be careful too."

"Trust me, sis, I know what I'm doing."

Carmen chuckled briefly as she reached for the handle. "Funny, I thought you didn't think of me as your sister, Duncan..."

Duncan shrugged. "It's just a slip up, Carmen. Don't read too much into it."

"Racter told me the same thing, when he called me, 'my friend.'" She laughed as she got out, and shut the door. "I'll see you around, Duncan... and... thanks, again. I appreciate your help."

"It's never easy, Carmen, but I know you can get through some of the toughest moments, with a little help." He paused. "And I guess... you will always be a sister to me..."

Carmen gave the ork a smile as she stepped away from the car. "And you will always be my brother, Duncan."

With that, Duncan drove off, while she waved him off.

 

Once she returned to her room, Carmen could hear the shower running, while Koschei was as animated as ever, by tearing into her clothes once again. She knocked on the bathroom door to hear Racter reply, "Yes?"

"I hope you don't mind covering my shift again, Racter... I am feeling tired."

Racter opened the bathroom door slightly, to look down at her with a raised brow. When they made eye contact, he could tell she wasn't lying, so he nodded as he shut the door. "Very well, my friend."

"Thanks," she replied, as she stripped off her clothes. "Um... If you don't mind, Racter, can we... talk, later? It's important."

"I certainly don't, my friend. Rest well."

Carmen smiled as she ran her fingers over Koschei's chassis, before she laid on the bed. "Thanks... Good luck, Racter!"


	17. Late Night Talk

Even though it was past midnight, Carmen couldn't sleep. She has felt restless since yesterday, when she felt that panic attack, and what's worse is what Duncan had told her. That Catherine Talon might be involved in something, that could bring trouble to Club Sanguine.

Or maybe it was just her overactive imagination that was keeping her up. She couldn't tell anymore.

As she was about to reach for her PDA on her night stand, she heard Racter say, "Looking for one of your 'toys'?" Making her flinch in surprise.

"I thought you were sleeping, Racter," she replied as she turned to him with a puzzled look. He chuckled as he rolled to stare directly into her eyes. Even though they carried no hint of emotion, Carmen's body shuddered slightly from his gaze, but she didn't turn away. In fact, she quite liked it whenever he looked at her like this. All of his attention was on her, and her alone.

Something she had long missed since she left the Yellow Lotus.

"Normally, I would be spending my time working, however, that is not the case anymore, unfortunately." He tapped his index finger against his temple before he continued. "So, I have been feeling rather restless tonight, especially with so many ideas running through my mind."

Carmen snort as she tucked her hands under her pillow. "I feel the same way, to be honest, but for different reasons."

"I assume it's about what Mr. Drake and your brother spoke to you about?"

She paused, then buried her face into the pillow with thinned lips. "Yeah..." she sighed. "I... don't know what's going to happen, Racter, and that scares me. What is going to happen to us, if we lose this place? I am going to have to find a new place... I am so tired of being homeless... I grew up on the streets, and I don't want to go back... And, what is Catherine going to do? Is she even related to this issue at all? What if Duncan said isn't true? What if-" "Santos," Racter interrupted her with a sharp tone.

Carmen glanced at him briefly, before she shifted her gaze to the pillow. "I'm... sorry," she said.

Racter huffed. "You clearly aren't the same person I've worked alongside with back at Hong Kong."

Those words pierced her heart, but they were true. Carmen never felt the same since she left the crew, and then Duncan. She wanted to say something, but no amount of apologies will fix this situation. Especially since Racter isn't the type to accept and forgive, nor forget.

The two laid on the bed in silence, while Koschei sat on top of the pile of shredded cloth, whirring quietly as he kept his sensors on them.

"Can I ask you something, Racter?" Carmen spoke up, breaking the silence.

"As long as you aren't going to bring up the past, go ahead."

"Actually, that's something I want to talk about." Carmen rolled around to lay on her back, and stare at the ceiling as she continued, "I know this was so long ago, but... did you always know about my condition?"

Believing that this will be a long conversation, Racter reached for the box of cigarettes on the night stand on his side of the bed, a lighter, and an ashtray. With the tray placed between them, he lit up a cigarette, and took in a deep breath. "Back in Berlin?" he asked, letting the smoke out in a puff.

"Yes."

"No, I did not. While I was very much aware of the fact you had a hysterectomy, the reason why never occurred to me. Why would it, since we weren't so familiar then?"

She smirked. "I guess not... When we met again, I remember that you tried to dig into it a bit, though. Then you tried to manipulate me, when you couldn't do it, saying that since I knew so much about you, why wouldn't I do the same with you... Knowing that, you were just doing it because you could, and wanted to. You were always testing me, thinking back on it."

Racter chuckled briefly, before he took another drag. "Why are you bringing this up, Santos?"

Carmen sighed heavily. "It hurts me when you said I'm not the same person... but, I can't deny that you're right. It got me thinking back to when we first met... and when we really first met back in Berlin." She laughed. "The memories have become fuzzy, but I could still remember that I've traveled up until my memories were wiped by Bleak... I think, I even tried to learn some new languages, but it was difficult to do. I'm still amazed that you could learn so much, especially within a year, Racter."

"I believe I had said I was very determined to learn anything when I could. That's the freedom we are given, Santos."

"And you plan to make that happen in your goal? Give the post-humans the ability to learn anything, if they wanted to, thanks to their advanced technology?"

That certainly got Racter a little excited as he sat up immediately. "One among many possibilities, yes."

Carmen giggled as she slowly sat up as well. "How did you feel when you could speak the languages fluently, Racter?"

He sucked on the cigarette stick for a moment, thinking. "When I had mastered them, I felt accomplished. Learning more than one language was an obligation in certain countries across Europe many years ago, and still may be now, in this era of mystics and technology." Racter then turned to Carmen with a curious look. "And since you are trilingual, my friend, how did you feel when had to practice Cantonese?"

Carmen hummed as she remembered how strict Raymond was about speaking Cantonese. He was quite a stubborn man when it came to it, but it did help her, as well as Duncan, once they arrived in Hong Kong. "Honestly? A little bit proud, I guess. While it may be because it's Raymond's primary language, and Duncan and I could only speak it in his house, it was sort of a fun challenge." She paused as she remembered her mother briefly. "But, in some way... I guess it reminded me that there is some importance to learning certain languages... Especially since at the end of the day, Raymond became my foster father. I mean, I had learned Spanish because I don't want to forget where I had come from, because it was the only language my mom and I spoke... So... you know..."

Racter said nothing as he let out another puff of smoke, and let the cone of ash fall into the tray with a few taps. "But you couldn't master some of the other languages during your time in Berlin."

"Nah... I mean, it was cool, I guess, to still be in some other country, but I never dared to install a piece of tech into my body at the time. You could say, I was scared..."

"That you would lose a piece of yourself in exchange?"

Carmen tilted her head with a slight frown. "I guess... but, then again, at that point in time, I was new to the whole shadowrunner business. It's strange thinking about that, then comparing it to the moment I was in Hong Kong. I certainly didn't expect that things would turn out the way it did, but despite it all, I was sort of... happy to be in Heoi. Well..." she chuckled as she rubbed the back of her neck. "More than happy, I guess. I felt welcomed, even though I was a criminal, and I loved it. I... really, really did."

Her throat suddenly ached as if something got lodged in it. Carmen struggled to hold back the tears, but she couldn't help herself. "I screwed it all up... I didn't mean to... but... I did."

Racter said nothing as she wiped away the tears.

"I'm... so tired of feeling sorry for myself, Racter... As you've said, there is no point to think about it... but damn it, I can't help it. I'm..." Carmen bit down on her tongue to stop herself from apologizing. She forced herself to clear her throat, and shook her head as if to forget the topic. "Anyway, you wanted to talk about your ideas, right? So, what did you have on your mind, Racter?"

"I could take your other arm off, and give you a new one..." he said out loud, surprising her.

"Wh-what?!" she squealed, then nearly jumped off the bed when Racter slowly turned his head to look at her from the corner of his eye, with a wicked smile on his lips. "Nope, no way, no, Racter! You aren't going to take my other arm!"

A puff of smoke escaped when he laughed. "Seeing you so frightened is an amusing sight to see, my friend... Perhaps I should actually do it, then."

As soon as Koschei's engines roared and stretched out his limbs, Carmen backed up towards the wall. "You wouldn't dare!" she yelled.

Racter simply smiled while Koschei slowly made his way towards the bed.

Then, a puff of dark red mist came out of nowhere, that revealed Ryan in his sweatpants. "Either you two get it on, or you stop this right now! You are causing a disturbance!"

Racter laughed as he gave Ryan an apologetic nod. "My apologies, Mr. Drake." He then turned to Koschei, while he returned to the pile of cloth. "You can lay back down, Santos," he said to her with a wink.

Carmen cautiously climbed back under the sheets with a look of disbelief. "Damn you, Racter..." she hissed at him. "Sorry, Drake."

Ryan eyed the two for a moment, then shook his head before he vanished in a cloud of mist.

"He certainly has his eyes and ears everywhere," Carmen sighed. "If we were indeed having sex, he wouldn't be here at all."

Racter crushed the cigarette into the ashtray, and brought it back to the nightstand. "Even if we were very loud, my friend?"

Carmen chuckled at the amusing thought. The last time they had done it, she was screaming his name, but it was only during the party that night. Normally, she would be quiet, just like before, in the Dowager Empress, so no one, except Gaichu, could hear them. No matter what they did, nothing ever escaped the ghoul's other senses, so he often left them alone during those times. (But, everyone knew, didn’t they, Carmen thought.) "Yep. You see, Ryan adores knowing that his workers are getting some on their own time, because he doesn't see sex as a bad thing, as long as it's consensual and healthy. Hell, he even approves of bondage, but I don't know who does that... and it's really none of my business either."

Racter stared at her with a raised brow. "I'm starting to believe that this is more of a brothel, than a strip club, my friend."

"Huh? Oh, no, not at all! I mean, yeah, sex workers do stop by at times, but it's not for sexual purposes. I think we had spoken about this before but, this club is also a safe haven for sex workers that need a place to stay, especially during certain days, or personal reasons. But, that's only on the floor below ours, where Ryan himself stays. He monitors everything in the building, but he doesn't treat the visitors the same way he does to us. We work under him, as shadowrunners, while the sex workers that come here, are taken care of, and looked after by him, but never have to work for him, unless they choose to. He pays them for their job, and then sees them off, if they choose to leave. But, for you and I, we have to kill, to get anything at all. At least we have access to the basement, so that's a bonus for us, but if you want something, you have to pay with blood. Most likely someone else's, of course."

"I see," he replied with a low hum. "Does he believe that the sex workers could be traitors, too? Or that they may be spies?"

"I think so." She shrugged. "I mean, Ryan is the boss here, but he can only do so much at a time, vampire or not. To be honest with you, I do think he has someone else working with him, and it's not Moira, the woman that worked in the medical room before. He may have another person, maybe another decker, that is a lot better than me, that manages most of the technology that they have installed here, like the cameras and such. Didn't you ever check the wiring down in the basement? Or try to find the camera they have hidden in here? Apparently, before you came, Ryan could only rely on me to do maintenance, since Valerie and Brimstone aren't so tech savvy, which makes me wonder, who else could have done it, until I came along. Maybe Moira did, but she prefers to take care of an actual mother, instead of a motherboard, you know?"

Racter looked up at the ceiling, then eyed the vents in silence, before he turned back to Carmen. "Do you believe that this person truly exists, Santos?"

"I can't say..." she replied. "But, there are some things in this club, that got me thinking that Ryan may have some connections out here in Seattle. I've always wondered how he could get his own club up and running, especially since he is infected with a strain of the HMHVV. You know how people tend to be around them."

He gave a thoughtful hum. "People can be quite judgmental in general, my friend, but I understand what you mean. You certainly got me curious about if your theory is true."

Carmen chuckled as she lay back on the bed. "I don't know if anyone else, but Ryan, knows, or even think that there is another person working for, or with, him. I already got a lot on my mind, already, so I think it's best to forget about it. Maybe I'm just talking out of my ass, again."

Racter silently looked over Carmen with an impassive stare, then reached out to brush her dark hair back. Her breathing hitched when she felt his warm hands brush against her cheeks, and stared into his eyes. "W-wait, Racter, what are you doing?"

His lips curled into a smile, as he retreated his hand, and laid beside her. "Teasing you, my friend."

Carmen pursed her lips, as she felt a familiar, frustrating sensation ran through her body, starting from between her legs. "Oh, screw you, Racter!" she yelped, right as she climbed on top of him. "You can't just tease me into getting turned on, and then act as if you didn't do anything! If you want to have sex, ask me!"

He looked up at her, amused, since she was sitting right on top of his cyber. "Very well - would you like to have sex, Santos?"

"Sure!" she replied immediately.

"Good, because you seem like you need it, my friend," he said, right before he dug his fingers under her top.


	18. A Party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Of course." Ryan plucked the cup from the air, as he pulled out his PDA to send a message to her. Once she glanced over it, she looked up at him, and nodded.
> 
> "I’ll do my best, but... I won’t promise it will go well."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many, many, many thanks to one of my friends, Shadow, aka shadowNova on ao3. I just banged my head against the keyboard, until I was done, and asked for her help to review it. Again, many thanks.

Carmen was silent as she stared at Racter's back. While this was the second time they had sex here in the club, it left her feeling much more fulfilled. For once, in a long time, she felt like her old self.

Only for it to wither away as she rolled off the bed to shower and change. As soon as she stepped out of the room, she noticed Valerie holding Aries in her arms, right before she disappeared into her room. Some part of Carmen wanted to go knock on her door, but for what reason? There is no doubt that Valerie is still heartbroken, so what can she do? There was no way to bring comfort to someone that has feelings for her, after sleeping with the person she prefers instead.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of her PDA beeping. Carmen was thankful for it, since she would had probably lost herself in anxiety.

It was a text message from Ryan, telling her to meet him at the ground floor. Without question, she walked into the elevator, to see him lounging on the couch, with a cup of blood in his hand. He lifted the glass to greet her, as she asked, "You got a job for me?"

Ryan's lips parted into a grin, before he took a sip. "Indeed I do, but it will have to just be you and your lover."

"'Lover?'" she repeated, puzzled at first, until it came to her that she was talking about Racter. "Racter is not my lover, Drake..."

"My recording of your recent love making says otherwise, darling," Ryan returned. She rolled her eyes with a scoff.

"It's just sex, Drake."

"Rough, hard sex," he continued, making her cheeks turn into a deep shade of red. "I can see the love bites on your neck from here, and you can't walk straight... He had equipped himself with your favorite 'toy' didn't he? The one with the rubber spikes?"

"Shut the hell up, Drake, it's none of your business!" she shrilled, as she jumped on top of him to grab him by the collar of his see through shirt. The cup was lifted by the mist that surrounds him, as he pets both of her hands with a wide smile.

"You are just so lively, darling!" He sighed softly. "It really makes you cute."

Carmen blinked, then let him go to sit beside him on the velvet burgundy loveseat. "The job... please," she pleaded.

"Of course." Ryan plucked the cup from the air, as he pulled out his PDA to send a message to her. Once she glanced over it, she looked up at him, and nodded.

"I’ll do my best, but... I won’t promise it will go well."

"I am not asking for promises. As long as you get out alive, that's all that matters. Just follow your orders to the letter, and things will be put right once again." He sipped down the wine to the last drop, then sighed in satisfaction. "I trust you, Carmen, and your partner too."

"Right." She got up from the couch with her PDA close to her chest. "I will let Racter know."

\---

They have been to parties a few times before, but this one had to take the cake for being the most extravagant. Classical music played, as the guests formed groups to talk, or stood to the corners to stay away from it all. Some were upstanding citizens, invited to the party, others were CEOs and Presidents of various companies, two were shadowrunners, disguised as a married couple, showing off their custom drones to the others.

With a face that seemed so flawless, thanks to make-up, Carmen kept her arms locked around Racter's, as they made their way through the crowd, with their drones right behind him. Ryan had helped them with their outfits, that were modest compared to everyone in the room.

The dark green dress, with a black band around Carmen's waist, reached to her knees, and covered both of her arms, to hide the scars and the cyber. The black leggings underneath fit her comfortably, so did her sneakers. Ryan also had brushed out the knots in her hair, to straighten it out, which cost quite a few combs, and a brush. The result of his troubles was perfect, even though she couldn't help but fiddle with it on the way here. She wasn't used to having such straight hair.

Unlike her, Racter was easier, given that he was already handsome, in a rugged way. He didn't like the idea of wearing a suit, much like how he didn't like the idea of going to a party, but for the sake of a job, he went along with it. Like her outfit, his was black, but with red accents around the edge, and the bottom of the sleeves. It complimented the bright red headwear under his collar, that was attached to a brand new bracer, and his belt. Ryan also trimmed his hair to make him look a bit neater.

To no one’s surprise, she quite liked how he looked.

"So, my love," Racter spoke up, amusing Carmen, "what should we do first?"

"You can drop the act, Racter," she replied. "No one here cares if we are actually married."

He chuckled as he held her closer. "When it comes to people like these, I can see why. By the time we came in, I've already heard about someone's infidelity, even though they weren't together anymore."

Carmen scoffed with a smile. "Everyone has some sort of 'juicy information' about someone, and unless it can be of some use to us, I think it's better to forget about it."

"Very well, my friend. So, what shall we do until we have to start searching?"

Carmen looked around carefully, before her eyes were fixed on the post that the host is supposed to be in about an hour. "I think now is a good time to start. I shall 'go to the bathroom,' while you keep an eye out. Remember," she took out her PDA to show the image of Catherine to him, "if you see her, try to strike up a conversation with her, and learn anything you could. I know this goes without saying, but please be careful, and never, ever, bring me up for whatever reason. Even if you're curious, we need me to stay hidden, no matter what my name is, okay?"

Racter brushed her dark hair behind her ears, soothing her nerves that were slowly bounding themselves up. Red crept up on her cheeks, but she didn't turn away. Instead, she smiled and gave his arm a firm squeeze, as she pressed her face against his chest.

"Thank you," she whispered, before she let him go to hide away in the crowd.

He gave her a salute, and turned away to take a seat far off to the side. Koschei stood beside him, to let him run his hand over the drone's chassis and wait.

 

To act as if Carmen belonged was second nature, thanks to her years of living on the streets, and her time as a shadowrunner. But second thoughts started to rear in her head, as she walked down the hall filled with people gossiping and laughing to each other, dressed up in beautiful dresses and suave suits. She even jumped when a security guard approached her from behind, asking, "Are you okay, Miss?"

She cleared her throat before she replied firmly, "Yes, I am just looking for a bathroom."

"Then just keep going straight down. There is a sign that says 'restroom'."

"Thanks," she said with a slight bow of her head, then turned away to speed walk her way there.

Much like everywhere else, the bathroom was filled with guests, making her anxiety worse. With a deep breath, she stood beside the door, to let people come and go, until she decided it was the best time to leave, following a troll out.

To her surprise, she found a large vent in the corner of a hall, so with her eye on the crowd, she rigged into Buddy, to let it crawl up the wall and enter. With her PDA in her hand, she turned on Buddy's camera to see where it was going, while she guided it through the narrow tunnel.

 

"Excuse me," spoke up a man, catching Racter's attention, "Do you mind if I sit here?"

Even though he wasn't the person he was looking for, Racter waved his hand over the chair beside him with a shake of his head. "Not at all."

He smiled as he adjusted his coat and took his seat. "I can't stand parties like this... It's too exhausting," he started. "So many people acting like their some big shots, while people like me are still struggling to even lick our bosses boots to get a promotion. Now, I don't really want to complain but I've been doing business for years, and I haven't gotten anywhere close to where I wanted to be."

Racter was lost in thought the moment the man began to vent his frustrations, almost letting his act fall off to reveal his cold interior, but he took in a deep breath to speak. "I understand what you are going through, as I've been there myself. I've used to work in drone technology back in Russia, until I found myself yearning for more. It wasn't until an opportunity arose for me to break off the chains, and found myself travelling for about a year. It was grueling, but fulfilling work, once I had found, and build a foundation for a brighter future."

Racter immediately noticed stars sparkling in the man's eyes, as he latched onto his every word. "Did you... really do that?" he asked, almost stumbling over his words.

He chuckled while Koschei stood before him to show the man. "Koschei is the fruit of my labors, thanks to it all. I may had suffer from quite a few setbacks, thanks to former friends, but I found myself in reliable company to carry on my work." Even though one friend made him lose it all, he thought, but he didn't say it outright. Why he didn't, he wasn't sure.

"I-I see...! That's impressive! It's impressive! Tell me, who do you work for now, if I may ask?"

Racter paused as he idly ran his hand over Koschei. "I don't work for anyone. Instead, I freelance," he lied. "Unfortunate circumstances nearly made me lose my entire work once again, but I've decided to take what I have, and start... anew."

"Oh... I guess you kind of have to expect some drawbacks, if you work independently. It's not as reliable as working for some big shots, but having the freedom to work as you please...! That sounds wonderful!"

As easily as ever, he smiled with a nod. "Indeed, it does." He then pulled out a box of cigarettes from his pocket. "As interesting as this conversation was, I need a moment, so excuse me."

"Ah, okay. Thanks, sir!"

Racter said nothing as he got up from the chair to walk away, with a cigarette stick between his teeth.

To his surprise, the man hopped out of his seat to stop him by placing a hand on his shoulder. "But, maybe, you could help me with something, if you don't mind, that is! After all, you did catch my boss' eye, Dr. Racter."

 

With the use of Buddy's tail to open the door, Carmen slid into a room with a computer, and a server. The lack of security made her question if this was the right place, but she quickly shook that thought of her head, as she shut the door, and made her way to the seat. Before she could jack into it, she heard a click, shortly before metal clamps sealed her into the chair, while gas poured into the room.

Within seconds, she was out cold.

 

Racter kept his hands in his pockets while he followed the man into a lounge, where an ork stayed, with two armed guards behind her. The man bowed his head to the chair across from her, signalling Racter to take his seat.

Koschei's limbs dragged against the marble floor, ready to pounce at anyone nearby, but Racter made sure to keep his hold on him tight once he sat down. "Pleasure to finally meet you face to face, Ms. Talon," he greeted her with an impassive smile.

The ork shook her head dismissively as she replied, "The pleasure is all mine, Dr. Racter. And it's Mrs. Talon, if you don't mind. I'm married to a wonderful person."

"I see. Well, congratulations, Mrs. Talon, I certainly hope you have a long beautiful life with your spouse."

Catherine took in a deep breath, then said, "I would love to have one, if you weren't meddling in my business, Doctor. It took some resources, and lives, but I was happy to have finally found out who was it, that threatened to take everything I worked so hard for."

Racter raised a brow. "Well, I suppose there is no point in playing any tedious games then, which, to be quite honest, tends to bore me. Not to mention, wastes time, so, what do you want me for, Mrs. Talon?"

She chuckled then sipped her tea. "Thank you for making it easier for me, because even I have little patience." Catherine shrugged. "Anyway, I wish to make a deal with you, Doctor. You see, I know who you are, who you work for, and who you work with. I can give you what you need, in exchange for their lives, even the one you call 'Llorona'. I just need their information, and then you can just easily walk away from all of this, with your pockets filled with nuyen, no strings attached."

Racter eyed her for a moment, before his smile widen. "That's what you want from me? Information?" He scoffed. "What a waste of time!" The armed guards aimed their guns at him, but it didn't wipe the smile off his face. "You clearly don't know how to do business well."

Catherine snort with a shake of her head. "Are you sure?" she asked, and as if on cue, a tall person wearing a gas mask and a leather armor walked in, with Carmen over their shoulder, and holding Buddy by its tail.

Racter blinked as soon as they slumped her into the chair, and dropped her drone right next to her legs. Catherine noticed the way he slowly reached out to her, to pull her face closer to his. Some look of relief seemed to have washed over him once he knew she was breathing.

(But, she didn't know about his condition. That the look he had wasn't relief. Even though it was a good thing she was still breathing, he was anything but happy.)

"Carmen is adorable, isn't she?" Catherine cooed. "So small, so free... so naive." She sighed as she took the hand of the gas masked person, and cupped it between her own. "But, I knew there were better ones out there for me, just like you, my dear."

The person took off the mask to reveal his scarred face, with large tusks. He wasn't anyone that Racter recognized, but he could see the metal plates in the back of his head, with tubes going down into the armor. Racter clicked his tongue in disappointment as he held Carmen close. "What a lovely couple you two make," he commented in irony.

Catherine stood up to kiss her husband, and gave his arm a firm squeeze. "We do indeed... But, back to the matter at hand. You could easily walk away from all this, and the girl, with nuyen, and anything else you wish, as long as you give me information. You see, there is someone else inside your vampire's little crew that was meant to work under me, but things went awry. She was supposed to work for me, but unfortunately, she was in debt to the vamp thanks to her unfortunate accident... If that didn't happen, then the club would had long been shut down. I would had not worried about some man prying into my business, just because he can."

Racter narrowed his eyes at Catherine, then scoffed. "You can go on and on about what went wrong, and why you're after Mr. Drake, but honestly, you are becoming even more of a bore, and I'd rather not listen to your little rant anymore." He then pushed Carmen back, to pull out something from his coat. Before anyone could react, Koschei leapt out towards the guards, while Racter picked Carmen up to drag her away from the fire fight that started.

Catherine's eyes widen in shock as she saw him run off, and shouted at her husband, "Chase them!"

It took him a moment to register it, then let out a loud roar, as he rushed towards them.

He didn't notice Buddy already had his ankle in his pincers. With a click, it snapped off, with him yowling in pain, while Catherine's jaw dropped as both of the drones followed the duo out.

 

Guards were already on alert, which meant the party was cancelled, not that it mattered. Racter pulled Carmen into a closet, to help her wake up from her slumber. "Slept well, my friend?" he asked, as he lifted her head up.

She shook her head with a growl, which made him chuckle, then yelped when he injected a needle into her vein, pumping her with substance. Even though she was going to be sleepwalking this whole time, it was better than carrying her around, he thought. Unfortunately, he had to guide her from here on.

At least he didn't have to worry about Buddy, he thought. With her controller in Racter's possession, he was certain that there was no need to worry about it.

 

Racter didn't hesitate to unleash Koschei on any guards that attempted to block his way, and made his way down the fire escape, while escorting Carmen. In an alley, a van was parked, and with a single hard bang, the back opened up.

"Hurry!" Brimstone shouted, as they climbed on board with the drones.

The troll immediately pushed the gas to get out of the darkness, into the streets, so they could get far away from the building.

Once they turned a corner to where Club Sanguine is, Brimstone and Racter stared at the collapsed neon sign among the rubble.

With a huff, Brimstone drove off.

“The plan went well,” Racter spoke up, as he soothed Carmen to sleep, by running his fingers through her hair, with her head on his lap.

Brimstone chuckled deeply, but his only eye held a hint of sadness. “Don’t count your chickens, yet, Doctor; that was just the start,” he replied.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Most, but not all questions, will be answered next chapter.


	19. Calm and Rage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for any errors in advance. Half asleep as I edited this.

Fire.

Everything was on fire.

And Carmen stood in front of it, holding a canteen of gas.

Flesh like tendrils wrapped around her limbs, making her drop the canteen, and drag her into darkness, where she found herself in a city of flesh. Towering over her was a beautiful creature, with rows of sharp teeth, calling out to her to return to where she belonged.

She did not fight as the figure picked her up from the ground, to force her to face them.

Unable to hold them back anymore, tears started to pour down Carmen's cheeks as she shook her head. "I don't have a home anymore! Now get out of my head, monster!" she spat, then found herself falling into the abyss below.

 

Carmen's eyes shot open, while her heart pounded against her chest. Realizing that this was a panic attack, she took in a deep breath, then slowly exhaled. It was a horrible feeling to wake up with, and what’s worse, is that she didn’t know where she is.

The only thing she could remember was being in an office, when gas started to pour in and forced her into unconsciousness. Everything else was a blur, except, she swore she felt a familiar warm hand, as she followed a shadow through long halls and unsteady stairs. Carmen ran her hand over her face, to see a smudge of make-up on her palm.

A low hum escaped from her as she recalled what Ryan told her.

\---

“You just need Racter to find Catherine, while I deal with the traitor here in the club.”

Carmen frowned slightly at his words, but it’s what he wrote in the message. “What is going to happen, when you ‘deal’ with them, Ryan?” she asked.

He was silent for a moment.

Then shrugged. “I don’t know,” he finally replied. “At least, I don’t know what will happen to me, but I need you to hide out in this safehouse for about a month. It’s already supplied with food and items, so you don’t have to worry about that. I trust that Racter will be on your side for that time.”

“You trust him?” she asked in disbelief.

“Don’t you?”

Carmen blinked in surprise, and tried to keep a straight face, only to smirk. “Of course I do.”

Ryan chuckled as he placed his hands down on her shoulders, and gave them a firm squeeze. “You may be a cry-baby, short stack, but you are a reliable runner. Just keep your head up, your focus on the goal, and fight, Carmen. I can see something in you, and all you need is a little push. But! Do be careful, of course, especially if you see Catherine. If you can, stay far away from her.”

Her face hardened as she gave him a firm nod. “I’ve already said I can’t promise you, Drake.”

He smirked. “Your life is much more important for the sake of this mission.” Ryan then pulled her in to give her a gentle kiss on her forehead. “You will do well, I’m sure.”

\---

Carmen rubbed the spot idly as she remembered his thinned, lipstick coated lips placed a magenta mark behind. A smile crept on her lips, while she tried to fight back the tears.

The sound of something clicking against the door grabbed her attention. She slowly got up from the bed to open it, to see that it was Koschei tapping it with his right leg. Carmen’s smile widened as she pet his chassis. “Good to see you’re around, buddy,” she cooed.

“That’s not Buddy, my friend,” Racter spoke up, making her jump. “Your drone is currently under your bed... or did the gas made you delusional?”

Carmen sputtered into laughter, even though she still felt very weary. Her body and mind felt so heavy, but she didn’t want to lie in bed for the time being. “That depends. Are you really the person I think you are, or are you just a figment of my cracked up imagination?”

The moment she saw a glint in his eye, Koschei lunged towards her to pin her down on the ground. The saw he pulled out was getting too close to Carmen’s head for her liking, so she pleaded for him to stop with a laugh. It did as soon as it nicked off some strands which fell on her cheeks.

She forced out an unsettled laugh. “All right, you’re real,” she said.

Racter hummed thoughtfully, then turned to the stove behind him. “I cooked something, so here.” He walked up to Carmen. as she straightened up, to give her the bowl, and guided her to the couch in the center of the room. “Considering that you were asleep for almost two and a half days, I’d believed you would be hungry.”

“Wait, two days? I was out for two days?”

“Yes, my friend, you were. It might have been because of the gas, and the substance I pumped into you. Normally, one shouldn’t mix either of those together, but your life was just as important as mine, so I had to do it. Tell me, did you wake up with a fast heart rate?”

Carmen slightly scowled at the thought, then took a bite of the food. To her surprise, it was rich in flavor, and so much more fulfilling than her usual meals. Once she swallowed it, she sighed. “I... did,” she replied. “Um... May I have some water, by the way?”

Racter snapped his fingers as he realized that was something he had forgotten, and took a pitcher out of the refrigerator to pour into a cup before her. “That’s a normal reaction,” he said. “Fortunately, you’re alive. However, you will need time to recover.”

“Right.” She nodded in agreement. “And... thanks, by the way. For the food.” She paused. “For everything, actually.”

“You’re welcome, my friend.”

  


The safehouse was a simple two floor house, with the rooms above a garage and a workshed. It was small, but not uncomfortable. It had everything that they needed. A room with singular twin size bed, that both Racter and Carmen didn't mind sharing, a bathroom with all sorts of essentials, a living room with a kitchen, a couch, and a television.

It wasn't the worst place to live, Carmen thought, in fact, it was better than most places she had slept during her childhood. Everything was intact, so there was no need for touch ups of any kind.

Unfortunately, there was nothing here to keep her busy, except watch the news, which she grew bored of quickly. She already knew the destruction of Club Sanguine, since it was apart of the plan, and there had been no reports of Catherine either.

What did bother her though, was that Ryan didn't contact her, or anyone else, yet. She didn't even know what happened to Valerie either.

As far she knew, she may be part of the plan, but for what exactly?

"I'm happy to see you have become rather lively, my friend," Racter spoke up, stopping Carmen from pacing around the room.

She blinked a few times, then shook her head to clear it. "I'm sorry. I have a lot on my mind."

"Obviously." Racter sighed as he sat up on the couch, to extend his hand out to her. "Come sit down. I think it's about time we talk."

It has been a few days since they came here, Carmen thought as she took his hand. He didn't tell her what happened during the mission, because he thought it would be better for her to rest and clear her mind, before they discussed it. Whatever happened would had troubled her, which she didn't doubt.

"Tell me," she said, as her grip on him tightened. "Did you... really see her?"

Racter looked into her eyes, filled with questions, and apprehension. Once he took a drag of the cigarette, he answered, "Yes, my friend. I did indeed meet Ms. Talon."

She felt a slight twinge in her heart. "But... you didn't get hurt..."

"Thanks to my quick thinking, along with the help of your drone. Even though you were unconscious at the time, I decided to tap into its system to control it to snap her husband's ankle. It's simple when you already know how a drone functions, and what you need in order to make it work."

"Not to mention you added your own bit of touch to Buddy," she replied with a lopsided grin.

He gave her a smile in return before he inhaled smoke. "I apologize for doing that without your permission. I know that what I had done, was no different than what your old partner did."

Carmen sighed as she let him go to lay back against the couch. "There is a slight difference, Racter; you didn't use Buddy to invade my privacy."

Racter shrugged. "Perhaps. But, back on topic - Catherine and I had a talk. She tried to bribe me to work for her instead. Of course, I didn't take the offer, but she did say that someone else was working for her as well. Someone that is in Ryan's crew."

Carmen's brows furrowed as she wrapped her arms around her body. "It's... Valerie, isn't  it?"

"I can’t say-" "You don't have to say it," she interrupted him. "I had... some suspicion... But, I don't want to believe it. Honestly, I don't want to believe any of this. Catherine is a married, successful business woman, and I have little to no doubt that she really built herself a cozy little life, while I spent my years in prison. She used to act so wonderful and lovingly to me, that I believed and helped her, until she decided that I was no longer of any use to her. She is a vile woman, who is willing to let her own husband die, so she can claim a throne. Can you tell me that I'm wrong, Racter? That the person you met, is worse than the actual monsters we had faced?”

Racter stared at her in silence, with his hand over his lips, while smoke escaped between his fingers. He reached out to cup her cheek, as she struggled to hold her tears back. When they made eye contact, Carmen noticed that there was a hint of awe in his icy gaze. "What?" she asked.

"There were a few moments that I've thought you were angry before, Santos, but apparently, I was wrong. For the first time, I could actually see the real you, behind your facade. You are built on fury and rage, and to some extent, determination, I think." He brushed back the strands of her hair behind her ear, feeling her shudder under his hand. "How... humane."

She gave him a quizzical look, before shaking her head to clear it. "Is it a bad thing?" she asked.

He chuckled briefly. "Oh, no, I think not. It's a natural reaction when it comes to betrayal, and we have been betrayed quite a few times in the past. I may have known how it feels, but I've never expressed it the way you did just now. I wonder, Santos, can you rebuild yourself together, into the person you once were, or are you going to change into an entirely different person?" Racter hummed thoughtfully as he pulled his hand away. "To be quite honest, it would be better for you to stop denying everything, and accept that what had happened, is in the past, where we can't go back to. What you do from now on solely depends on your decisions."

He then turned his gaze back to her with a casual smile. "I wish to see how you will grow, my friend..."

Carmen inclined her head to one side as she took Racter's words to heart. Or at least tried to. She was so confused and frustrated, she felt utterly lost.

But, what he did say, that they can't go back to the past, echoed in her mind.

She completely forgot about the kind of person Racter is, and she felt ashamed to admit it. "You're.... right," she muttered.

"Pardon?"

Carmen took in a deep breath, then repeated, "You're right. I am not the same person... And whoever I am now... I don't know. But... isn't that a common thought to have? I'm barely thirty, and I have no real foundation to stand on. At least, not at the moment. Of course, no one is the same, but sometimes, even if we had built our lives just right, anything can happen, where everything falls apart... At that point, isn't it best to just rebuild? I know I've said it before, but I don't think I ever truly meant it... That I want to rebuild... your life. I've never wanted to rebuild my own. The only thing I cared about, was trying to 'fix' things, but it's... Everything is beyond repair..."

She forced out a laugh as she got up. "I... I need some time to rest... Get my thoughts in order. Sorry... Racter."

He simply smiled as he placed his hands on her shoulders. "I agree that it's better if you rest as well, my friend. We can talk more another time."

"Right... thanks." Carmen stepped away from him, to return to the room. As soon as her head hit the pillow, memories started to run through her mind, as vivid as a trideo program. Unable to contain it any longer, she started to silently cry in frustration.

Eventually, her rage settled down enough for exhaustion to take over, so she slept.

 

Later on, the bed creaked as Racter laid beside her. Thanks to her short height, and slender build, there was enough room for the both of them. He could see streaks of her tears down her cheeks, which told him enough, but he didn't say or do anything to wake her up.

While Koschei hid underneath them, right beside Buddy, the two slept quietly. Carmen slowly became entangled with Racter, but neither one woke up.

 

Brimstone decided it would be best to sleep in the back of his van. He didn't want to deal with anything that is going on between the "couple," and rather keep to himself. However, his sleep was interrupted when his PDA went off.

A message, he noticed.

"I have Valerie secured somewhere in a different location. As I've said before, everyone has to stay out of the public for a month. I will send you a message for further any news. Until then, stay safe darlings," a message said. Brimstone huffed as he pocketed the PDA.

"Whatever you say, Drake."


	20. Sera

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carmen makes up her mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the sudden shift in tone and writing half way through. I was hit by writer's block for a little while, as I tried to write this chapter out, but I decided to give up on quality to finish the story, and proceed with the plot. If there are any mistakes, I'll try to correct them ASAP, but do feel free to let me know what I need to correct as well. God knows how many mistakes I overlook when I write. [shrug]

The days felt agonizingly slow, but no one could do anything, except make the most of it with what they have. Racter kept himself busy inside the workshed, doing small projects, while also brainstorming new ones, with the supplies they had. Brimstone either spent his time training, or making sure the van works well, by replacing old parts with new ones.

Carmen, on the other hand, decided to spend most of her time meditating. She kept thinking back on the fact that she had hit rock bottom, which pained her, even though she knew it was out of her control. What kept her from wallowing in self pity, however, is that there is a little bit of hope that things will be all right somehow.

She had been through worse, she thought. While one of her biggest mistakes lead her here, there is no point in wasting time and energy wishing that she did not sided with the elf. That she should had burned that building to the ground.

What she can do instead, is figure out where to go from here. Carmen still has faith that Ryan is okay, but if something did happen to him, they will have to rely on a back up plan that might set them back a bit. At least Ryan has planned it all out for them, which started to make her wonder about a few things.

Has he been planning for this for a long time, or since Carmen started working for him? There hasn't been any sort of news about Catherine, until Racter strutted back into Carmen's life, but that was a coincidence. He was working with another group for some time, and besides, it was confirmed by both Ryan and Racter that Valerie is the traitor.

As far as she knew, Racter cut all ties with his old crew, once he found Carmen, and decided to work with her, to kill her. But, he has decided to forget the promise they made, to continue his work for a better future. Did Ryan really persuade Racter into changing his mind, or was that his own choice?

So many questions whirled around in her head, until the sound of a machine whirring brought her back to reality. For a very brief second, Carmen thought she stood in the basement of the Dowager Empress, as she laid her eyes on Racter’s back, then sighed heavily as the image faded away, bringing her back to reality. "Hey, Racter," she greeted him. "Are you doing okay?"

Racter turned to her, with a cigarette stick between his lips. "I'm well, my friend, all things considered. How about you?"

Carmen snort as she approached Koschei, as he stood off to the side. "I'm... confused, to say the least. Since there is nothing for me to do here, I'm just left alone with my thoughts, and I really, really don't like it. I wind up asking myself stupid questions that I don't think will ever be answered."

Koschei inclined his body to one side, while keeping his sensors on Carmen. She smiled at how adorable he is, and even cooed as she wiggled her fingers at him. Racter inhaled the smoke deeply, then said, "I certainly don't mind talking, as I happen to have a lot of time on my hands these days." He gestured to the workshop around them, that sorely lacked compared to his previous ones. "Not much to do, to say the least."

"I feel your pain, Racter, since there isn't a computer here to mess around with." She shrugged with a smile as she turned to him. "But, if you really don't mind, I would like to talk to you about what's on my mind these days."

Racter pointed at nearby stool for Carmen to pull up and sit across from him. Once she got comfortable, she clasped her hands over her thighs, then took in a deep breath. "I can't help but think about why you're working with me again, even though you were out for my head the moment we saw each other back at Club Sanguine. Did Ryan put you up to this, or did you make the choice yourself, Racter?"

He sucked on the cigarette for a moment, staring into Carmen's dark brown eyes. "I suppose it's a bit of both," he replied, letting the smoke out in puffs. "Ryan and I spoke about our relationship, and perhaps it would benefit me to keep you around, given that you happen to have connections. While I'm not happy about our current predicament, I trust that Ryan knows what he is doing."

"Why?"

"Why what, my friend?"

Carmen pursed her lips while her hands balled into fists. "Why... do you trust Ryan at all?"

Racter leaned back to take another drag, then slowly exhaled through his nostrils. "On the surface, Ryan seems nothing more than an HMHVV infected person, but he is definitely a lot more than that. I assume he was another shadowrunner, until he decided to take things into his own hands, and became a Fixer." He chewed on the butt of the cigarette before he continued, "However, these are just my assumptions. Ryan is an incredibly private man, and who knows if he ever was a shadowrunner at all. It would certainly explain how he came to own a strip club in the first place, built with all sorts of equipment, from turrets to medical supplies and cyberware."

Carmen frowned slightly at that thought. "If that is possible, then why hide it?"

Racter shrugged. "Who knows? If you want answers, you will have to speak to him yourself."

A brief growl rumbled in her throat as her brows furrowed. "Ryan is a pain in the ass..."

"I suppose that comes with the job of being the boss, no?"

Carmen couldn't help but chuckle, then sighed. "I... have to find him."

That got a raised brow from Racter. "How do you plan on doing that, my friend?"

"I will figure it out, by tracing his steps, starting from the rubble of Club Sanguine. He has to be somewhere where he can keep Valerie secured, and himself safe from public view, like how he put us here. I know, it's almost about a month, but I can't wait any longer, Racter. I have to find out if he is all right... and to ask Valerie some questions."

He stared at her impassively, then gave another shrug. "Very well. If you don't mind, I would like to join you, my friend."

Carmen was taken aback by Racter's unexpected response. "You're okay with this?"

"I'd rather do something than built little useless things from scrap," he grunted in disapproval.

"To be honest, I thought you would find this place boring," she replied with a crooked grin. "I also prefer to have you and Koschei around, instead of going solo... Do you think Brimstone would join us?"

"You should ask him, my friend, not me."

"Right, of course." Carmen paused as she eyed the workshop for a moment. "First things first, we need to get prepared. I think Brimstone has some equipment in the back of his van." She hopped off the stool to leave, only to be stopped by Koschei as he lept towards her.

Before she could ask, Racter tugged at her shirt to pull her back. "One moment, my friend," he said, then turned towards the table to reveal a mask made from metal from under a towel. "Here."

Carmen took it from his hands, and looked over it in awe. The face was made of metal, but the back had paddings in several areas so she wouldn't suffer anything worse than a bruise, hopefully. There were also slits around the cheeks and under the nostrils, with mesh built within them. "Oxygen mask?" she asked.

"It should save you a few seconds to escape, if someone happens to carry sleeping gas. I also made one for myself, just in case."

"Oh?"

Racter pulled out another mask that is somewhat similar to hers, but slightly different in appearance and structure.

"You were planning this for a while, weren't you?"

Racter's grin was enough of an answer, which made her laugh.

"Of course you were..." She let out a heavy sigh as she turned on her heel to leave, with Racter close behind.

It shouldn't have come as a shock that Brimstone was leaning against his van, with his arms crossed over his chest. "Decided to finally take action first, eh, Carmen?" he asked with a grin.

"Yes..." she replied with a firm nod. "Do you want in?"

Brimstone barked a laugh. "You'll have to be daft to think I don't! But, are you ready?"

Carmen paused, until she remembered her drone. She quickly went up the stairs to turn Buddy II on with a controller, and ordered it to follow her back to the others. "Now I am!"

 

Brimstone's van had clothing and armor prepared for them, along with the weaponry, first aid kits, repair kits, and a new board for Carmen. Since she struggled with putting the mask on, Racter helped her. Once the straps behind her head was tightened, he turned her head to face him. "Remember," he spoke up, "if they throw sleeping gas, act quick and get out. There is only a little bit of oxygen installed, and it will trigger once a gas slips through the vent."

"Okay," she replied. "Do you... want me to help you with yours?"

Brimstone snickered as he overheard her, getting a look from Carmen. "You might as well be fixing his tie, if he wore one, like a kind wife," he joked.

"Shut up, Brimstone," she growled through gritted teeth.

As the troll laughed, Carmen shook her head with flushed cheeks. She flinched when she felt Racter cup her chin to lift her gaze up to his. The idea of feeling his lips against hers made her heart beat fast against her chest, but she quickly pulled herself back to clear her throat and her head. "Stop teasing me!" she huffed.

"You're reactions are amusing, my friend," Racter replied with a grin. "However, you don't have to worry about me. This mask is easier to put on than yours."

Carmen nodded her head firmly. "Right. So, let's get going to Club Sanguine." She paused. "Or at least, what's left of it."

Once he clicked the belt across his body, Brimstone turned the keys to bring his van to life. Carmen stared down at Buddy during the drive, as she struggled to keep her nerves calm. She didn't want to accept it, but she had to face the facts that the place she once called home, is now destroyed.

When they made their way through familiar territories, the sight of where the club once stood confirmed it, with the lack of the bright neon sign.

Carmen wanted to scream, but when the van came to a screeching halt, she held on tight to the seat beneath her. Brimstone's low growl rumbled through the van. "Get out," he ordered. "Now."

Racter did not hesitate to open the back doors to leap out, with Carmen close behind along with their drones. Even though they should be moving, Carmen was curious about what is it that stopped them, so she leaned over slowly from behind the van, to see a large figure with a large axe of his own. "Mr. Talon," Racter whispered to her. "I'm surprised to see him up and about."

"Yeah, well, Catherine is a business woman, so obviously she had paid someone to replace his ankle." She huffed as she turned away. "Let's go, Racter. Brimstone can keep him busy."

As they ran off, Brimstone clashed against Talon with a large smile. "Been a while since I fought anyone as tough as you!" He laughed. "Let me guess, you are practically built from the ground up with some top notch cyber, eh?"

Talon said nothing as he rose the axe once more.

"That's what I thought, you metal zombie! No one can ever be strong enough without proper modifications!" Brimstone raised his weapon up to block the attack, and kicked him in the leg, which didn't give in, not that he was expecting it to, but it did push the tyrant back a bit. "Let's see how long you'll last..."

 

The way to the club had become blocked off by barricades and police tape, but there is always a way around it, Carmen thought. She looked around the area to find a small gap that was big enough for a drone to crawl into. Once she rigged into Buddy, she controlled it to break a nearby panel and open a hidden door.

She gave Racter a thumbs up, before she cautiously stepped inside. Racter decided that now was the best time to slip the gas mask on as he followed her in.

Carmen rose her hood over her head to hide away her masked face, then took a look around the rubble. With Buddy's help, she was able to push them aside, with the hope that they would find some sort of clue, or sign that the messages that Ryan sent them were true. That he is indeed alive, with Valerie.

During her search, Racter had joined her, along with Koschei, to clear out the mess. While they didn't find any sort of reliable evidence to help ease her apprehension, they did find some sort of large container that was somehow left without a scratch. Carmen examined it, to find a panel on the side.

Before she could take a closer look, Koschei's engines roared, which forced her to bring her attention to the figures wearing military gear. Right as she rigged into Buddy, Carmen raised her hands up to reveal she is unarmed. "Who are you?" she asked.

The military said nothing as they readied their weapons.

A scoff escaped from her, before she decided to make the first move, by slicing one of their arms with a flick of her wrist, letting the laser wire free. Koschei followed suit by ripping into a nearby enemy, and Racter pulled out a pistol to shoot at another armed soldier.

Nostalgia mixed into the rush that pumps through Carmen's veins, as she took out the head of a soldier with ease. It blinded her from the grenade that was thrown at her feet, until Buddy skittered to bat it far enough to hit a nearby wall. Carmen turned to it, then grabbed Racter's arm to run towards the brand new exit that led to an alley.

She glanced behind them to see that their drones were following suit, along with the enemy, as they ran down the dimly lit pavement. There are no way to outrun a military, but if they are Catherine’s hired men, then maybe it would be best to face them instead. Carmen stopped Racter to yell, "Run! I'll handle them!"

He flinched for a very brief moment, but then simply gave her a pat on the arm. "I promise to kill you after you die, my friend."

She let out a snort as he ran off with Koschei, then stood firm in front of the army. They took their positions with their weapons aimed directly at her. Carmen disconnected herself from Buddy, then unstrapped her mask.

" _ Que sera... sera.. _ " she sang under breath as she tucked it into her hoodie. She then tucked her hands into her pockets, glaring at the armored soldiers with a smirk.

The song continued in her head, as their weapons clicked.

With a deep breath, she shut her eyes. Maybe she should have asked Racter for a cigarette, so she could taste death before a bullet could.

The sound of her heart beat against her ear drums, as she waited for the sound of gunshots, but it turned into screams of anguish instead, while something bright hit against her eyelids. She slowly opened them to see a large dancing flame engulf the soldiers.

A bandaged hand sat on her shoulder. "I'm sorry... Carmen..."

She turned to see Valerie trembling with hiccups. Before she could speak, Carmen took her hands to run from the bonfire. "Now is not the time, Valerie!" she yelled.

Valerie had to force Carmen to stop, to guide her through the narrow passages, and down a manhole, where they reunited with Racter, Ryan, and Brimstone.

"Hello, darling," Ryan greeted her, then yelped when she leapt into his arms.

"You're alive!" Carmen cried.

"I guess you could say that, yeah..." he replied with a grin, as he patted her back. "Anyway, we have to get going now. Moira is expecting us."

"What...?" Carmen blinked at the vampire as she let him go.

"Well, a small group, actually... Some old - and new! - friends of mine." Ryan turned on his heel to snap his manicured fingers forward. "Let's go, ladies and gentlemen!"

 

"I'm... sorry, Carmen..." Valerie whispered to her, as they continued to follow Ryan. "I... I..."

Carmen let out a huff. "I don't take betrayal lightly, Val... but, I'm not like Racter, so I'll hear you out. What happened?"

Valerie wanted to answer her, but found herself stuttering, until Carmen placed her hand on her shoulder.

"Breathe."

She did as she was told, then spoke clearly, "My life... was going nowhere until... I met Catherine. She promised me a better life... but... when I was caught in an accident... Ryan and Moira saved me... even though I was supposed to kill them..." She paused. "I... decided to repay them... then... I met you..."

Valerie planted a hand on Carmen's back. "I thought... you and I were the same... We didn't have anyone to rely on anymore... Afraid to face our past, because... we were traitors... but..." Her gaze turned to Racter. "He... came along... and... things changed. You were... happy with him. Even though... he wanted to kill you... you still... loved him... I... was jealous."

Valerie lowered her hand to hold it against her chest. "Ryan knew how I felt... and what I was planning... so when you were gone with... him... I attacked Ryan... but he didn't kill me. Instead... he destroyed Club Sanguine... saying that no one but him is going to bring him down."

Carmen let out a brief chuckle. "Well, this is Ryan, Val. Club Sanguine was his pride and joy, since he built it from the gr-" she stopped when she realized something, then bit her lip.

And grinned.

Ryan couldn't help but smirk as he continued to walk on ahead.

"Anyway, yeah," Carmen huffed, while Valerie was confused. "Are you okay by the way? Hopefully, you don't have any more plans to stab us in the back?"

Valerie shook her head.

"Good." Carmen gave her a warm smile, making Valerie's heart thump faster.

Thank Cat her face was covered in bandages, because she never saw such a beautiful smile before. Racter is a lucky man, and he doesn't even know it, or even appreciates it, she thought.


End file.
